The Mistress

There was a more interesting plot with the the blond thot neighbor and the husband, me thinking she would seduce him over the wife only to be subverted for a haunted house plot twist with the wife being the hero; the most boring , bland, annoying, shallow, oblivious, unappealing, useless character in the entire movie. The lace front wig on the best friend was trash. The black women seemed more like trophy wives rather than actual characters. They might have have well been foreign-owned mail order wives from thailand. The plot seemed more consumable following the husband and in figuruing out why hes being stalked or whatever but then the cinematography got more and more confusing as it went on. Also, only white people died or bled which was unbelivable.

Obviously some money spent on this but shame about the story, script, acting and a million cliches. Almost a film school graduation project.

Cliches abound with old house, cellar with boiler, rocking chair in attic, old letters etc discovered, attractive neighbour, newly weds, the classic coming down the stairs in the middle of the night to discover the old phonograph playing etc the list is unending!

This may have worked as a 20 min short but dragging it out as a,feature was never going to work.

The camera work again is cliched trying to be clever but missing every time. Sorry but dreadful.

Most boring newlyweds move into a unique Victorian house, and yes, you guessed it, it's haunted by boring normcores who conveniently are vintage collectors and costume designers to fit perfectly into the tropes needed for the script.

Oh, we found a plate camera in the attic. Let me go and develop the film in my expensive little cellar and print some unprintable pictures from 1895 for you, you know, I love old crinkets! Wow, I was able to obtain a solid image from the 120 year old plate and look! I wonder who this lady is... And the movie unravels below expectations.

The best characters in the movie were Dawn, her boyfriend, and Rimbaud, the dog. Parker needs to get some backbone and acting classes.

The basic story of the movie is really good, couple move into haunted house.....he has had a stalker.....overbearing neighbour.......troubled writer, etc, etc.

John Magaro is excellent as the writer, the interplay between the dreams and real life is good enough and the direction leans heavily on Hitchcock, Giallo and, at times, Kubrick for inspiration.

However the issues come with the execution. The wife of our 'protagonist' is terrible. Absolutely no chemistry with her husband (she may get on well with the furniture as she is that wooden). Several scenes seem to have been created without consideration to the rest of the movie. The wife is angry one minute and cheerful the next, the angry neighbour is angry, errrr.......because? And the pacing is so off it feels like a waltz.....slow, slow, quick quick slow.

Zero chemistry boring newlyweds move into their new house even tho they don't seem to know each other or share the same plans for their future at all. Meh...

They discover a picture and a collection of 100-year-old letters from a woman who committed suicide after being abandoned by the old owner of the home...

I now what you're thinking... I've seen this all before! Yes, yes you did. Only this time you can watch it in a below average production. Long story short, the movie is unwatchable. A TOTAL WASTE OF YOUR TIME.

Bad everything> script, acting, pacing. Cinematography and music is awful. The end result is a generic bad movie that is no way bad enough to be unintentionally entertaining or funny.

No spoilers because you already know how will it end. SKIP IT. Save yourself!