Cockneys vs Zombies

A gang of bank robbers fight their way out of a zombie-infested London.

When I heard the title of this film, I kept thinking there was no way this could possibly be good. The reviews were consistently positive, but that title was just so bad. Hopefully others are not scared off by the lame name, because the critics were right -- this is a winner.

We have a rocking soundtrack that keeps the pace and flow going, one of the best chase scenes ever put to film, some clever moments in a subgenre (zombie films) that should be completely used up by now... and some elderly folks with big guns.

Others have said this is "Shaun of the Dead" meets "Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels". That may be fair -- it is as good as both of these films, and really needs to be seen. I can see it becoming a cult classic alongside "Shaun"...

I guess that's the best described movie title since Snakes on a plane. The movie delivers fully on its title and that's all you can expect from it, isn't it? A year ago Frightfest audiences were treated to a glimpse of some footage from the film. August 2012 the same audience (or whoever came again) got to see the whole film. And I'd say it played pretty well with most people.

I liked it too. The humor is good, you get Cockney language thrown in a couple of times and one the slowest chases you'll see in any film. And it works really good tension-wise. Mr. Ford of course is a delight to watch and he must have had a lot of fun on the set. You can't and shouldn't take a movie like that serious. Otherwise you'd have trouble enjoying this

COCKNEYS VS ZOMBIES is one of those films that's perfectly encapsulated by a "what it says on the tin" type title. A bunch of Cockney no-gooders find themselves caught up in a zombie epidemic, and the rest of the film plays out exactly how you'd expect, whether you've seen the trailer or not.

Despite the predictability, though, and let's make it clear - COCKNEYS VS ZOMBIES breaks no new ground whatsoever - this proves to be an entertaining movie, with solid production values, a game cast and fast pacing. Yes, the script is as dunderheaded and profane as you'd expect, and the young characters are stereotypically dull (aside from eye candy Michelle Ryan), but where the film really has fun is with the old-age cast members.

The scene stealer is without a doubt Alan Ford, delivering another of his delightfully sweary turns a la SNATCH, and proving himself an able fighter when it comes to tackling the undead menace. There are strong turns, too, from Honor Blackman, Tony Selby, Dudley Sutton, Georgina Hale and the late Richard Briers, for whom the film provides a fitting epitaph. The scene with Briers and a zimmer frame, heavily featured in the trailers, is an undoubted highlight.

Along with the old-timers, we're treated to all manner of zombie carnage, with plenty of gory effects and violent mayhem en route. The zombie scenes outdo those in B-movie fare such as FLIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD and APOCALYPSE OF THE DEAD, while the comedy makes this preferable to the overrated SHAUN OF THE DEAD. No classic, perhaps, but certainly a lot of fun.

(57%) Very much a movie that owes a great deal of its existence to "Shaun of the dead", and to a large extent that's no bad thing. It shares a super simplistic plot of its predecessor, only here it has got its head in the clouds a great deal more with its comedy bank job scenes and 17th century mummified zombies. The laughs themselves aren't of an equal quality of "Shaun of the dead", and they mostly derive from the very cockney turns of phrase, with the very funny Alan Ford giving it both barrels whenever the opportunity arises, and the sadly no longer with us Richard Briers gunning down zombies with an uzi from his zimmer frame. Overall it isn't a comedy classic, but it does offer exactly what it promises.

I've grown quite allergic to the terms zombie-comedy, and especially to the allegedly cool slang name "zomedy", because we horror fanatics are literally overloaded with movies about the Living Dead that are supposed to be horrific and hilarious at the same time. In reality, however, the vast majority of them are just downright dull, uninspired and irritating. Ever since the British cult hit "Shaun of the Dead", it seems like every (young?) aspiring film director assumes that he/she can make a horror comedy even though these two remain the hardest genres to put into a blender together. Therefore I was rather skeptical when I went to see "Cockneys vs. Zombies" at a local horror festival here in Belgium. The idea sounded good, the trailer looked mighty fine and the cast features a handful of names that even make the most mediocre movie tolerable (Alan Ford from "Snatch" and Honor "Pussy Galore" Blackman) but still … it remained a zomedy! It took me more or less five minutes to put all my skepticism aside, though, because the movie starts out amazingly and I immediately got sucked in. The intro sequence and particularly the awesomely animated opening credits, guided by the magnificent song "What's that coming over the hill is it a monster?" by The Automatic, set the basis for an exhilarating, fast-paced and blood-spurting horror adventure. Admittedly the script features many clichés, stereotypes and redundant melodramatic moments, but overall seen is director Matthias Hoene's approach fresh and inventive. In Cockney country, the heart of working class East London, construction workers are building a gigantic apartment complex for which several traditional monuments have to be demolished, including the old folk's home of Granddad Ray Maguire and his friends. His offspring plans to rob a bank so that he doesn't have to move away from the area, but something else also interferes with the construction works… a zombie invasion! When the workers stumble upon ancient catacombs underneath the city, the region is quickly overrun by thousand of zombies. The bank robbers battle their way back to the retirement home as fast as they can, but the old timer prove themselves still tough enough to stand up against the undead. "Cockneys vs. Zombies" (don't you just love it when the title is, in fact, the entire plot?) is a straightforward and largely unpretentious zombie romp that delivers what you expect (or hope for). There are various flaws, like for example the screenplay refuses to sacrifice any real pivot characters and overdoes the melodrama a bit near the climax, but these are widely compensated through ingenious little plot aspects and the excessive gore effects. Certain sequences already qualify as instant classic in my book. For example, you haven't seen a zombie chase until you witness the race between a pensioner with a walking frame and a traditionally slow-sauntering rotting corpse. Or, how to kill a zombie with a metal plate in his head? And then for the obvious biggest trump of the film I'd like to refer to the title. The genuine Cockney characters and the delicious rhyming slang dialogs are the elements that truly distinguish the film from the others. Alan Ford must be the coolest Cockney since Sid Vicious and, as expected, he steals the show in every sequence he's in.