Suck

I attended the World Premiere of "Suck" at the 2009 Toronto International Film Festival. To simply say that this film is an original hybrid of genres doesn't do it justice. I'd label it a rock 'n roll vampire musical comedy road movie. Talk about a unique concept.

Writer/director/composer/lead actor Rob Stefaniuk has crafted a work of pure genius. The basic premise is simple: rock band The Winners, like most small-town acts, will do whatever it takes to make it in the music world. They stumble upon an "interesting" formula and hit the road.

The catch here is that the technique comes via bandmate Jennifer (Jessica Paré), who picked up something while carousing with a visiting rock band that gives them powers you just don't get from Red Bull.

The mind-boggling ensemble cast features such diverse icons as Malcolm McDowell and Dave Foley to rock legends including Alice Cooper, Henry Rollins, Moby, Iggy Pop, and Alex Lifeson. There aren't just cameos, either.

Even with its stellar cast, "Suck" is still story-driven and filled with gutbusting humor. The script guarantees a gag on every page. Production values belie the film's relatively small budget with topnotch visual and special effects that just wowed me. Michele Conroy's rapid-fire editing picks up the already fast pace of the action and never lets up. But the soundtrack makes the movie. Kickass music infuses the film in segments that could function as standalone videos or strung together to make a concert movie. The fact that most of the musicians/characters (led by director Rob Stefaniuk) actually wrote, play, and sing their own songs is a big plus, to say the least.

What a great ride! Suck is one of those movies that will put you in a good mood. Jessica Pare is mesmerizing as a vampire, you will find yourself unable to break eye contact with her in some of her scenes. The makeup is done in the vein of the original Dawn of the Dead, giving the vampires a graphic novel look and feel. The humor is akin to Shaun of the Dead and rarely misses. I found myself laughing all the way through the movie, something I can't often say with many of today's comedies. The cameos by the old school rockers were awesome and contributed immensely to the production. The music-videos-in-a-movie format works well and almost makes you feel like you're back in the day when MTV was actually MUSIC television. There is one song performed by Jessica Pare that is quite touching, in my humble opinion. The director's conservative use of ever so slightly slowed movement is hypnotic. I know my comments may not seem like they were written for a film like 'Suck', but that's why I feel it's so eclectic, and it so works.

That's what the director (and lead actor) was afraid of in the question and answer session after the theater showing at Montreal Fantasia Festival. What if his movie called "Suck" sucked ? Well it doesn't but it's not that great either. I'm not quite sure it's an humorous alternative for Twilight fans either (or people sick of it) as they're two very different beasts. Suck is a rock horror comedy with vampires. The only female of an unsuccessful band gets turned into a vampire and the band then starts gaining success because of her very charismatic presence. We see the band travelling from city to city, trying to deal with their changed band mate while being tempted themselves by the dark side.

Jessica Paré, the actress playing the female band member, is mesmerizing to look at with her white skin, pale blue eyes and red lips. One could understand the fascination she would create. The other highlight of this film are the roles played by famous musicians such as Alice Cooper and Iggy Pop. They're a bit longer and juicier than cameos but although they play well, they basically play themselves and nothing particularly challenging (except for Moby, a pacifist vegan in a surprising performance). I admit the crowd reacted very well to the film but a Fantasia crowd is quite generous with this kind of genre film, especially a Canadian one. I personally found it sometimes amusing but not hilarious except for a few bits (one of them being a visit to a convenience store).

Suck's writing did not impress me as it often felt too easy or cliché. The low-budget production had a Canadian and straight-to-DVD flavor to it. From a technical standpoint, it was quite bland with too many cuts from one head to another in dialogue scenes often making it feel as if the two actors were not even in the same place. The spinning vampire and the crossroads showed a bit more inspiration. The several musical numbers felt as if they were there to pad the thin story. To be fair, the original songs were rather good but it sometimes made this comedy skirt too close to the musical genre, something I'm personally allergic to unless Tim Burton is somewhat involved. I think "Suck" would be a decent rental provided you have a few friends to watch it with interested in the subject material and/or knowing the (in)famous guest stars. I think young Twilight fans, perhaps sucked into renting it because of vampires, might be disappointed because the vampires are lame (they have powers but not really shown) and the little romance there is kinda sucks as either serious or parody.

Rating : 6 out of 10 (good)

In Montreal, Joey (Rob Stefaniuk) is the lead singer of the struggling band "The Winners", composed by the sexy bass singer Jennifer (Jessica Paré), the guitarist Tyler (Paul Anthony), the drummer Sam (Mike Lobel) and the handyman Hugo (Chris Ratz). Their incompetent and alcoholic manager Jeff (Dave Foley) is incapable to help them to reach success and they are on the road on tour playing in clubs and bars in Canada and United States of America.

After a show in a bar in Montreal, Jennifer, who is also the Joey's former girlfriend, leaves the place with the creepy Queeny (Dimitri Coats), who is a vampire, and they spend the night together. On the next morning, Jennifer does not meet the band and they travel in their hearse to participate in a rock 'n' roll show without her. In the last moment, Jennifer arrives with a different appearance and on the next day they find that their home page had had several hits, all of them with good reviews and compliments to Jennifer. They become famous and Jennifer brings great audiences to the shows of "The Winners" and one by one, the musicians are turned into vampires but the reluctant Joey. "The Winners" become successful and Joey has a dream where he meets the bartender (Alice Cooper) of their show in Montreal in a crossroad and the man tells that he needs to decide whether he wants to be a winner or a loser. Meanwhile the vampire hunter Eddie Van Helsing (Malcolm McDowell) is hunting the vampire queen and tracking "The Winners" in their shows.

"Suck" is a refreshing vampire and rock 'n' roll cult movie with cameo of Alice Copper, Iggy Pop, Moby and Henry Rollins. But the greatest attraction is the sexy and gorgeous Jessica Paré with her luxurious lips and beautiful eyes. Chris Ratz is hilarious in the role of the handyman Hugo and Malcolm McDowell has also a great performance. But the originality of the story makes this film a worthwhile entertainment. My vote is seven.

Title (Brazil): Not Available

I'll skip the review of the regular stuff and jump right to what makes this movie unique. First off, we get a parade of cameos from legendary alt-rockers We have Alice Cooper as the headmaster vampire (not far from his real life persona), Iggy Pop as a hopelessly old school studio engineer, Henry Rollins as a hilarious loud mouthed DJ, Alex Lifeson (guitarist extraordinaire for Rush) as a creepy border crossing guard, Carole Pope (80s punk icon) as a club bouncer, Moby as an arrogant rival band singer, and who knows, probably a few more I missed.

"Suck" relies on these cameos to give the audience a little wink. So if you're unfamiliar with these people, you might miss out. It's never too late to look them up on youtube though. There are other little inside jokes too; for example, there are a number of visual homages to famous album covers (if nothing else, you'll recognize Abbey Road). Digging deeper, there are funny ironies such as Moby playing a character named "Beef" whose gimmick is to play with raw meat on stage. In real life, Moby is a strict vegan... and it's hilariously obvious that the "raw meat" is nothing more than some strips of rubber with red food dye.

A lot of this stuff comes at you fast, and even the most hardcore fans will probably miss a few gags. So don't worry if you have to watch the movie multiple times.

OK, all that aside, the story itself is pretty basic but with an interesting metaphorical spin to it. As other reviewers have pointed out, it's not a movie about vampires as much as it's about the vices of success... whether we're talking about drugs, glamour, or "selling out". How far will a struggling musician go to win fame? And at what cost? That's basically the only serious part of the film, and the rest is totally tongue-in-cheek. Don't expect realism. In its place expect absurdist humor (such as the fact that nobody gets caught for murdering people in the open, or live on national radio). Again, this may be a metaphor for the fact that many famous musicians never got caught for their extravagant drug habits even though they flaunted it in public. With that in mind, "Suck" becomes a biting satire of not just the fame-seeking rock stars, but also of the mindless fans who will condone and glorify anything.

I saved one of the best performances for last. Malcom McDowell plays an ominous character with a fetish for flashlights. He brings his usual larger-than-life presence to the screen but with a nice comedic air. Check out the outtakes on the DVD and you'll see that he had a great time playing the part.

Even if you have no idea who some of these famous cult musicians are, you'll still find the movie entertaining, funny & interesting from start to finish. Similar films include the Australian flick "Garage Days" by Alex Proyas, "Thunderstruck" (about a bunch of AC/DC obsessed fans), and on the more serious side, "Sympathy for Delicious" which tells a great rock'n'roll metaphor.

But like I said up front, this film's power lies in its ability to connect with "cult audiences" using cameo appearances to create quirky characters. In that respect I'd compare it to "Coffee and Cigarettes" by Jim Jarmusch (featuring Iggy Pop, Tom Waits, The White Stripes, etc). If you recognize at least 50% of the people I've mentioned, then don't hesitate to see this flick.