Well, the official website for "Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore" has a paw for a mouse pointer, the movie uses most every lazy pun possible about pets, and a reviewer has already claimed the movie marks the end of civilization as we know it. With such prospects, a film about talking cats and dogs coming together to fight off Kitty Galore (voiced by Bette Midler) doesn't eye well for adults. And it doesn't. Any mathematicians in the theater can better spend their time tracking the noticeable upward curve of boredom and silliness the longer the movie runs (the pet gags during the end credits don't count).
Aren't kids movies like this supposed to be funny despite their absurdity? It took 9 years to bring this sequel of "Cats & Dogs" to the theaters, which gave it plenty of time to spread a wide umbrella for big name voices. Nick Nolte's deep scratchy voice took to the end credits to figure out, but it stands out in his role as a scrappy mentor dog, Butch, the muscle of a secret agency run by semi-intelligent talking dogs.
We learn that dogs have an underground spy organization where no human has ever entered, appropriately outfitted with hi-tech gadgets in the Bond tradition and specially tailored for dog clichés. Cats have a similar underground facility for their secret organization, named MEOWS. The first pet puns are quirky and tone setting, but after the third or fourth - and when combined with lame cultural references (including Hannibal Lecter and who knows what else) - it becomes torture.
The main character is a German shepherd police dog named Diggs (James Marsden), who joins a band of unlikely heroes to try to protect humans against Kitty Galore. Diggs follows the 'Dirty Harry' template of the ends justifies his means, that is, he causes havoc while taking down a madman and tends to set off fiery explosions in the process. So, of course, he's recruited by Butch (Nick Nolte) to join the secret dog organization. Diggs and Butch reluctantly join teams with a top kitty agent, Catherine (Christina Applegate), from MEOWs. Along for the ride is a pea brained pigeon, Seamus (Katt Williams), to provide comic relief.
The plot is adequately thin and senseless. They battle against Kitty Galore (voiced by Bette Midler), a hairless Sphinx cat, who plans to enslave humans and take over the world. Her plan is to use malevolent sound waves, from a weapon called "The Call of the Wild" (by the way), at an ultra low frequency (just for dogs) to trigger all dogs to violently rebel against humans. Humans will have to lock them all in kennels. But the movie forgets to mention how Kitty Galore intends to conquer humans. Will she change the frequencies and use the weapon on us? She doesn't specify, but perhaps she could change to an appropriate frequency to trigger our caveman impulses, or something.
Kitty Galore is funny as she reluctantly placates her not so magical magician owner. She became evil because her previous owners treated her like a freak and threw her out after she fell into a vat of hair removal cream (like the Joker from "Batman"). The movie has a couple other funny moments with a house filled of too-lazy-to-move high cats, and a goofy Calico cat voiced by Wallace Shawn (lampooning his role in "The Princess Bride"). Other stars take part in hopes of success, including Neil Patrick Harris, Roger Moore, and Joe Pantoliano, but it doesn't help much.
Some of the most effective scenes are ones where pets give normal pet reactions. The audience actually responded to Diggs whimpering as he was locked in his cage by his former cop partner, played by Chris O'Donnell (in one of the few human roles). The pets only pretend to act normal around humans, but on occasion a little girl stumbles on them talking. She's amazed, no one believes her, and the pets resort to clichés (butt sniffing for dogs).
That's it. Most of the other jokes are dull. The movie becomes so lazy, any action is just meaningless and boring. The movie uses a mix of live action animals, puppetry, and computer animation to bring the pets to life. The CGI mouths attempt to make such absurdity seem real, but who cares when what they say isn't funny or interesting. The 3D wasn't very noticeable at all.
