Alien Planet

So what we have here is yet another solid entry from Alan Maxson, from the so bad it's good (or perhaps just plain bad) Christmas with Cookie series we moved to the incredibly impressive dark comedy Patina. Alan has managed to take the quality of Patina and put that in to a full length feature. The effects on display here are impressive, and gory! The pacing is great, the cast are great, the directing is great. Whilst the story isn't necessarily breaking new ground, it is solid enough. Some moments seem a bit under developed, whilst others exceed expectations. If you are a fan of indie movies and a fan of sci-fi you should check this out.

OK, always try to say something nice first ... so the makeup was actually pretty good, almost impressive. And that is the only thing positive I can say about this movie. The rest of the special effects (besides makeup) were just a notch above high-schoolish and the script was horrible. As to the acting, well I comment on it when I see anything worth mentioning.

And please, for the rest of you viewers, don't be fooled by the friends and family that wrote those positive reviews that do not even closely resemble the movie. A quick clue to see if a review is real or not, just look to see how many other movie reviews the person has contributed. If this is the only movie they ever reviewed, its a good clue it is garbage.

I just saw this at the premiere and I was really impressed with how good this looked in spite of the budget. The movie was well shot, the make up is top tier and the effects are great for a film of this budget. Has an old school vibe like Star Trek TOS or Doctor WHO. A real passion project and it shows. The blood and gore were all wonderfully over the top, like a Kung Fu film or old Sam Raimi. At the Q and A after the movie the director revealed they went through 11 gallons of blood! The pacing slows down for a bit in the beginning but once it picked back up this really took off. A perfect Saturday Afternoon flick. 7/10.

It wasn't worth it. Was reminded of Saturday morning kid's scripted fantasy tv programs from the 70s. So cheesy.

Replete with smarmy sarcasm and hostile speechifying by the seemingly emotionally immature, laced with lame smack-talk, and even saying it to the unconscious.

It has dialogue with full sentences that consist of, "Ugh, this arm is never gonna heal." and "This damn plant." Also, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you right now."

The writing, acting, directing, are all about as bad as in the Extinct (2017) series, which was written and directed by BYU (Mormon) grads. The sophistication level is middle-school, like not totally stupid, but almost hopelessly underdeveloped.

The editing was also biffed up, to where an injury changed sides of the body, and changed back because they flipped footage a few times.

Some of the costuming decisions included Tabi Japanese Split Toe Shoes, or Ninja Jika Tabi Split Toe Boots, because those are totally 'alien.' My, my, my what this says! (Although, they're supposedly good for bunions, so maybe those aliens got Foot probs, not just food and water probs.)

I did sort of love it when the puppet/animatronic-looking Healing-Pet growled out it's master's name, fully articulately. L'il Spewy also snarls "NO" and "O. K.," in a grossly charming way.

Anyway, it had a zero payoff ending after being terribly predictable, too.

This movie has a very 1980's feel to it, and is a fun movie to watch. While they were not able to spend millions of dollars on it, they did great with what they had. The story is very engaging and the actors also do a really good job. I would compare it to the movies that came out when I was a teen in the 1980's and this would have been great to see at the movies on a Saturday night with the gang! You can find movies that have spent tons of money on special effects, sets and a high dollar actor or two that aren't as good as this is. Yes this isn't a Hollywood masterpiece, it is still a good effort and is still better than 'La La Land' - now that's a turd of a film! LOL.