Rites of Spring

Two girls are kidnapped in the parking lot of a bar by unknown assailants. They are taken to a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere and strung up as sacrifice to a local deity that comes out in the spring. One escapes, stumbling onto a group of kidnappers right in the middle of a ransom plot gone wrong, and about to be made worse when a large, ugly beast out of a Party City costume log comes after them.

"Rites of Spring" is your definitive mediocre, boring slasher trying to be an homage to classic seventies horror. It's not bad, and those that say it is bad clearly haven't ever seen the films this is trying to remake. No horror slasher is good. Some are simply more exciting than others. This is not one of those films.

Our heroes are nonplussed actors who are not very good at what they do. But they represent the film in that they are not bad. Perhaps it is because the script has about as much life as a decorative plastic rock made to cover up blemishes in one's lawn. It's not ever particularly interesting. But it's not bad.

"Rites of Spring" is not a bad film. But it's not a good one.

This incredibly low budget horror movie has no clue what it wants to be. It is a home invasion movie, then a kidnap movie, then a serial killer movie, then a killer hillbilly movie, and the worst part is that it does all of these equally bad. The acting is terrible across the board, the story is laughable, the direction is all over the place, like it was filmed by a 10 year old that was using all the new features on his camera phone, which it was probably shot on. I understand that this was a bad movie and it knows it, but that does not change the fact the it is awful on every level, well, except maybe for the poster, which was interesting enough to catch my eye and got me to watch this waste of time movie. 1.5 Beards Out Of 5

Never having heard about this 2011 horror movie titled "Rites of Spring" as I happened to stumble upon it by random chance here in 2024. Of course I opted to sit down and watch it, given my 40-some years love and admiration of the horror genre.

I had no idea what I was in for, but that hardly mattered, as it was a horror movie. And that was, actually, more than sufficient to make me opt to sit down and spend 82 minutes on watching the movie. So of course I had zero expectations to writer and director Padraig Reynolds, whom effectively had every single available chance to entertain and impress me with this movie.

The movie was off to a good start, because you don't get more than 15 minutes into the narrative before things already start to happen. I must admit that I enjoy movies that throws the audience right into the action or mayhem, which definitely was the case of "Rites of Spring".

However, I have to say that the narrative stagnates and sort of settles into a slump about halfway through. And the story sort of flattens out, offering no ups or downs along the way. Sure, "Rites of Spring" is a watchable movie, and if you're a newcomer to the horror genre then it will be a thrilling movie to watch. But for a life-long horror fan, then it just ended up being a bland movie.

I wasn't familiar with the cast ensemble in the movie, though the name AJ Bowen does sound familiar, I just can't mention any movie in which I've seen him act. The acting performances in the movie were fair, which definitely helped to bring the movie to life on the screen in a more enjoyable manner.

Visually okay, but you're not in for anything grand here. Sure, it wasn't a movie that was particularly needing a grandiose array of special effects, but it would have been nice with a bit more effects to spruce things up, as it was somewhat needed. And as for the killer (or creature), whatever you opt to call him, well, I can't claim that I was particularly impressed. But again, it might be sufficient and suitable to a newcomer to the horror genre.

"Rites of Spring" might be worth checking out if you enjoy horror movies and haven't been jaded by years of exposure to the horror genre. Otherwise it just makes for a somewhat bland viewing experience.

My rating of writer and director Padraig Reynolds's 2011 movie "Rites of Spring" lands on a four out of ten stars.

A ransom scheme turns into a nightmare for a group of kidnappers who become victims of a horrifying secret that must be paid every spring.

Horror fans will instantly recognize AJ Bowen, the current independent horror go-to actor. Beyond that, many faces appear on screen that we may never see again. There is particularly terrible acting from the father character, which might take some viewers out of the movie.

This might appeal to some people, but it never seems to quite capture what it was going for. While it starts as a kidnapping film, it turns into something like a poor man's "Jeepers Creepers". And even then, there is an undercurrent that is not far removed from "It". At no point does anything seem quite original enough to merit respect.

If Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) and The Creeper (Jeepers Creepers) were to have a baby, Wormface would be the result. It's a low-budget slasher/creature movie that didn't knock my socks off, but didn't leave me gagging either...Well, not too much.

If you're not too anal retentive about your horror movies, the film in itself is not as bad as the others I've seen where I wanted to pour bleach in my eyes after seeing the first 5 minutes, sometimes less. You just have to understand that this movie is not up to par with the great horror classics. It's unoriginal, cliché-ridden and there are numerous flaws as you go along.

However, the actors are good and the cinematography is not bad either. Their shots of the corn field reminded me of Husk, which is an excellent film, by the way. The ending would probably leave you scratching your head, thinking WTF just happened. There are some loose ends left in the story that attempted to add some mystery, but failed.

In short, it's like an appetizer film that would be good to watch on a lazy night. It's watchable, if your expectations are not that high.