Disaster Movie

I am write good movie! Disaster Movie is very very fun and funny. I put fart jokes ha ha! Man come into room and he go FART and he poop in his pants! If you watch movie you see lot of farting and also pooping. There are sex jokes. Talking about boobs and bums and wieners is funny ha ha! I write jokes and they do the jokes in the movie. Fart! Ha ha. Fart! Farts! They drive up to house with pick up truck full of millions of the dollars for me to write them more fart and poop jokes. Carmen Electra has boobs and we have her do jokes. Earthquake kills people and they fart. Stupid celebrity people not safe I write jokes about them that I find on twitter. No one is safe from my funny jokes I make them look like they fart!

because he actually got the red light and thought it was green.

See what happens when you democratize a medium and make it available to everyone. I mean, give someone a bunch of 35mm film stock, a Panavision camera and 25 million bucks, some hot chicks and dorky guys and they think that they can make a movie.

Movies like this are good though!

Because they can't get any worse! And set the Jerry Springer crap bar even lower.

The plot is as thin as Kate Moss and the brain dead humor is lifeless even with real people saying the lines.

Just think, 25 million dollars could have: saved some turtles, fed some people, provided shelter for others, helped Red Cross, built houses in New Orleans, kept in the bank to load out to people needing money, provided 25 good filmmakers with a million bucks each, kept Leslie Nelson alive for a few more years, and could provide a dollar each for some 25 million people.

This left me speechless......and not in a breath-taking "Shawshank Redemption" type way! I literally wanted to rip my arm off and throw it at the TV it was so bad. My husband and I made a bet with one another as to who could keep watching it the longest........the loser buying the weekend beers! I was quite happy to lose that night. I had no idea what was going on, it kept skipping from one sketch to another with no plot, no reason and NO POINT! Awful acting, awful impressions, awful film! Pretty much is what it says on the tin, A Disaster. Do not watch this movie. You'd be better off stapling your genitals to a table for an hour...it'll be less painful for you!

Since the name of the movie is "Disaster Movie". The basic irony is that it's a ****ING DISASTER! A 90 minute **** flick based on pop culture and movie trailers. My god, Seltzer, retire and live off the money you made from your other below 3 star rated pieces of horse ****, please. Now when you do these type of movies, you're never going to get the "jokes" in 5 years, maybe even 2. They're just wasting their time, not really. They're just wasting our time. But whoever goes and sees this are brainless (Hypocrite moment) but bare with me, I got in for free and I regret it.

A free ticket, and a bad nightmare.

Do not watch this, support other films that are coming out today whom deserve it more.

Come on, do you REALLY want more of these? **** guys, just ****.

Really, I could write a scathing review of this turd sandwich, but instead, I'm just going to be making a few observations and points I've deduced.

There's just no point in watching these movies anymore. Does any reader out there remember Scary Movie? Remember how it was original with a few comedic elements to it? There was slapstick, some funny lines, it was a pretty forgettable comedy, but it was worth the price of admission. Well, That was the last time this premise was funny. STOP MAKING THESE MOVIES. PLEASE.

I could call for a boycott of these pieces of monkey sh*t, but we all know there's going to be a line up of pre pubescent annoying little buggers, spouting crappy one liners like, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and, "IM RICK JAMES BITCH" so these movies will continue to make some form of monetary gain, considering the production value of this movie looks like it cost about 10 cents to make.

Don't see this movie. Don't spend any money on it. Go home, rent Airplane, laugh your ass off, and then silently judge the people that are talking about this movie on Monday. Do yourself a favor.