Ninja

The highest praise I can heap upon Ninja is that there is absolutely no fat on this thing. It's lean and mean and gets right down to the point: ninjas! It's a scientific fact that ninjas are way cooler than pirates and robots combined. Even dead people know this to be true. That's why it's hard to even muster the energy to attempt to try to bag on a movie like Ninja. The script is flimsier than a leaf in a hurricane, the dialogue is spotty at best and trying to make sense of every plot detail just outs you as an unpatriotic ninja hater. What the movie does do well is show you ninjas killing the crap out of everyone on screen. Scott Adkins and Tsuyoshi Ihara have a hellacious final duel and everything leading up to it is paced faster than a one hundred yard dash. Let's be honest, you didn't have any interest in this movie for its stern position on global politics and the humane treatment of thoroughly owned ninja victims. You came here for ninja-on-ninja action. It's way better than Casper Van Dien's suckfest Mask of The Ninja and in my opinion slightly better than Ninja Assassin. It is not, however, better than Chris Lambert's The Hunted. That one is the high water mark for trashy non-Japanese ninja movies.

After getting Ninja DVD sent from my uncle in Russia, I decided to watch this movie. But since there was quite a bit Japanese language being spoken and DVD had no English subtitles, I decided to watch it with a friend who is good at Japanese and is an action movie fanatic.

Now I will say this movie is not perfect, but as a action movie, and Ninja movies fan, I was thoroughly entertained nonetheless. on par with Blood and Bone in terms of entertainment value, falling just a little bit short from Undisputed 2(8.5/10) due to some of its little faults. But despite its faults, I love this film and will be watching it time and time again (actually although I gave both of them same grade, I like this movie slightly better than Blood and Bone, because of my favoritism of Ninja movies ).

So at one point, the leader of a cult that really has little bearing on anything in this movie proclaims, "We control the life blood of this planet!"

Wait, what? It's not just that it makes little sense. It makes no sense whatsoever. Not much of this movie does.

But hey, you want a tight plot that makes sense and gives you pause to think? Netflix "Glengarry Glen ****ing Ross." This ain't that.

You want to see a ninja cut a man's arm off with his ninja sword and the man goes "Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!" while blood spurts out of his stump, then this is the movie for you.

You want to see a stacked gravure idol as a dojo master's daughter who always needs to be saved just because she's a stacked gravure idol and even though she's a ninja, too, then this is the movie for you.

You want shurikens, poison blowgun darts, a ninja flying suit, and an SUV that rolls over and blows up spectacularly for NO FREAKING REASON, then this is the movie for you.

You want to see two ninjas have swordfight on the rooftop of a skyscraper with the Empire State Building in the background and you say, "This is the most awesomest thing ever!" in your best Peter Griffin voice, then babe, this is the ****ing movie for you.

You want sense? Read Jane ****ing Austen. You want ninjawesome, grab this baby, some chips and a Stella Artois and you're set for the night, brochacho.

First let's get one thing straight! This is a genre movie. If you go into it thinking you are going to watch the Godfather then you are going to be disappointed. Scott Atkins delivers the goods big time as the hero ninja Casey further cementing him as a go to action guy. The moves this guy can do are out of this world. The story is pretty basic. An adopted American taken in and raised as a ninja. The fight scenes for the most part are beautifully done. Tsuyoshi Ihara is the real discovery of this movie. This guy should be getting some steady work. Now the bad stuff. The C.G.I. blood was cool in some parts, but over the top in others. The gliding with the wings could have been left out. The C.G.I. was a little over the top in the sword fights. I was also disappointed with the character Namiko. She was a little to frail for modern day women in action movies. Yes there are some cheesy lines, but that is part of the fun of these movies. The movie screams old school 80's movie, but in a good way. It ends up being a far superior film than Ninja Assassin and was made for a fraction of the cost. If you love action movies and hate the metro-sexual heroes that we get jammed down our throats every film then this is the movie for you. I hope we get to see more like this because this movie had my blood racing the entire time.

The plot is pretty weak in this movie, and lacks a really intense story, despite trying so hard to be intense. It gets by on some incredible fights with Scott Adkins, and quite frankly, I bet I'm not alone when it comes to people watching this movie, simply because of Adkins. It starts off a little slowly in the first half. Tsuyoshi Ihara provides some great intensity, and some good villainy, but it lacked the proper excitement for me. Once the second half begins, things really begin to heat up. The action is so strong, you tend to block out the average story. If Adkins's subway fight sequence isn't enough for you, then Adkins's going completely ballistic in the finale, by making many martial artists look foolish will definitely hit the spot. This guy is incredible, and if given the chance, he could be the action star the genre has lacked since the heyday of the 80's action heroes. I wouldn't call it a great performance, but he acquits himself decently. If you're not blown away by some of Adkins's moves, I really question your judgment. His love story with Mika Hijii isn't anything groundbreaking, but it's moving enough. Speaking of Mika Hijii, she's far from a damsel in distress. Not only does this woman kick major ass, but she takes a beating like a champ. I cringed in some of those scenes, but she held her own big time. It's pretty violent, if you like that sort of thing. I personally like violence. The finale is a bit over the top with the dramatics, but it does the job

Final Thoughts: See it for some of the terrific action scenes. Scott Adkins won't let you down. As long as you keep in mind that it's not a great movie, you should be able to find mild enjoyment. I didn't mind it. I'm actually curious about the upcoming sequel

5.3/10