Beer for My Horses

Hilarious... the movie plot should have been more like the extended video version, where Toby Keith was a cop and Willie Nelson was his father who was a retired cop and they bonded together to hunt down a serial killer. I was disappointed that this plot was not in the movie. I felt if it had been, the movie would have been much better and did better at the box office. This is what had a lot of people who was hooked on the video disappointed, me included. However the comedy was great! I'm one who loves to laugh. Yes it could have been better, but it wasn't the worst movie I've seen. Each character was very unique and have something obnoxious and funny about them. I thought it was pretty cool to have veterans in the movie like Ted Nugent, Tom Skerritt and Gina Gershon. They didn't do it because they needed money as one reviewer assumed! They did it because they thought it would be fun.! This movie has become one of my all-time favorites and I just watch it whenever I just need to de-stress and have a good laugh.

I have no earthly idea what "Beer for My Horses" is supposed to be or whom it's supposed to appeal to, but it does have one of the most unusual casts I've seen in ages. Rock and country music stars Toby Keith, Willie Nelson, Mel Tillis, Ted Nugent, Mac Davis and David Allen Coe join up with actual, honest-to-God actors like Tom Skerrit and Claire Forlani in a film derived from Keith's hit country song of the same name.

In fact, Keith co-wrote, directed and plays the lead in this tale of an Oklahoma sheriff whose girlfriend is kidnapped after he and his men arrest the brother of a nefarious Mexican drug lord for stealing fertilizer, apparently a key ingredient in meth production (who knew?). Soon, the law enforcer and his posse are headed south-of-the-border to rescue the girl.

Keith has thrown just about everything he can think of into the mix: small-town buffoonery, race-tinged melodrama, low-keyed romance, a troupe of circus performers, a flatulent bulldog, and more scowling Mexicans than you can shake a sombrero at. Somehow it's all supposed to go together, but even the most accomplished filmmaker would have trouble making it all work. Still, it's so homespun, scruffy and amiable that criticizing it too harshly would be like kicking the family mutt.

My wife and I are huge TK fans. When he was in the 'burgh last week telling the concert goes about the movie, we thought "what the heck, lets check it out." We should have been tipped off by the completely empty theater, but we figured, its 7:00 on a Monday night so maybe they're just really slow. Wrong-o. Toby, you write great songs and your singing is fantastic, but you need to get as far away from Hollywood as you can. I'm not sure if the acting was so bad it destroyed the writing or if the writing was so bad it couldn't be acted, but whatever the reason, this movie was just plain bad. On the sneak preview show on CMT, the stars/writers Toby and Rodney kept referring to it being like Cannonball Run. Having seen the Cannonball movies, I should have seen it coming, but the Cannonball movies would be Oscar material compared to this. I would have given it a 1 but there was one funny scene. Other than that, I say again save your $8.50 and watch it on CMT in 3 months.

Please bear with the prelude because I think this is the only place to tell this story and it has something to do with the movie:

I rent the house I live in. I was hoping to buy it, but it got bought out from under me, so I continue to rent while my youngest finishes high-school. Just before the house changed hands, I took a walk with my wife and met some guy in a cowboy hat and jeans, coat and work-gloves ripping out all the brush that lined the road across from our house (good thing... it was ugly). He told us he had just bought the land and was going to build a house on it. It was some 20 acres. We thought some housing developer was going to put in a new division.

I congratulated him on his purchase and I said I was glad it was a solo owner. You can count the residences in the neighborhood on one hand, so I introduced myself and said "howdy neighbor." He told me his name was Rodney Carrington. I asked "what kind of work do you do, Rodney?" I got a stunned deer look from him as it was obvious my wife and I had never heard of him. After he told me what he did, my wife and I made a little more small-talk and we walked home. On a whim, I looked him up on YouTube. OMG! Then I found out who Rodney was... and later that he bought my house. I'm now his tenant.

Before I get to the review, I will say that I find Rodney very funny, and he's quite the regular guy. He's a hard-working comic in the tradition of Will Rogers (though less g-rated) and he and his family make mighty fine neighbors.

Now, to the movie rating. "Beer for my Horses" isn't a bad movie, nor is it a must-see movie. There are some serious plot failures (no, you can't cross into Mexico the way they did), the bad guys are sadly cartoonish and the story is overall very pedestrian.

However, the acting is competent, the cast of stars was a pleasant surprise, and we're spared the cliché of making "The Man" (Tom Skerritt's role as the sheriff) seem like a jerk or a buffoon. He recognizes his rogue subordinates as at least trying and joins in the toasts when they seem appropriate. Rodney is only really turned loose for the rest-stop scene (and it's actually worth watching the movie just for that scene). Ted Nugent is there to act up with the weapons and his best moments are at the start of the film.

Summary: If you're not sure what to watch and you need a comic moment, grab some shots and beers and watch "Beer for my Horses."

I read on the message boards the following line: "For the love of god, how did an angel like Claire Forlani end up in hell?" And I think that sums up my thoughts on this film.

So, you give Rodney Carrington and Toby Keith the power to write a movie, named after a Toby Keith song, and directed by a guy who has done some Garth Brooks music videos. Throw in Willie Nelson, an arrow-launching Ted Nugent and David Allan Coe. I just don't know what to think anymore.

The movie is absolutely stupid, and you may enjoy that if you need to turn off your brain or you've already seen every episode of "Bridezilla". I don't know what the political message here is... I'm sure it's convoluted and stupid, though, since that's what happens the second you associate with Nugent (a fine musician, an idiot otherwise).