Devil's Tomb

I don't know where to begin with this flick. Maybe here: Soldiers who don't at all act & move like trained soldiers, female soldiers with make-up on while in combat, some third rate CGI effects that I could do on my PC in fifteen minutes, and enough plot-holes and unexplained crap to lose count of fairly fast.

In fairness, Cuba Gooding Jr. and Bill Mosely made the film ALMOST watchable. But those two alone couldn't save the horrid storyline, and the above-mentioned things. I tried very hard to get past some of the issues that I found with this film, but it was to no avail. After 48 minutes I found myself being thankful that I was more than half way into the film.

I thought years ago (in the 80's) that low-end horror flicks couldn't get any more lame, but was DEAD WRONG. It is sad to see someone as talented as the Oscar winning Cuba Gooding taking roles in such ridiculous movies. I hope that his appearance in this one didn't ruin his career long-term.

-JB

Directed by Robin of Sherwood, a.k.a. Jason Connery (son of Sean Connery) and lasting 1hr and 30mins this film is wedged into the Action, Horror, Sci-Fi, Thriller category.

When the credits to this film were rolling I got mildly excited thinking that there were some big names in this and that it would be a decent film. Unfortunately it didn't live up to my expectations as the plot was predictable, the action was lame and the effects were cheap. Cuba Gooding Jr heads up a Special Ops team which includes Taryn Manning, Franky G, Zack Ward, Brandon Fobbs, Stephany Jacobsen and Jason London they have been hired by Dr Elissa Cardell (Valerie Cruz) who wants to rescue her father Ron Perlman who is in a top secret scientific/military bunker. The troops are your average gung-ho grunts while Cuba Gooding acts as their moral compass despite experiencing random flashbacks to a previous conflict where Ray Winstone, his commanding officer, was killed. Winstone's death is explored in flashbacks but only adds to confuse the film rather than add to it. The team enter the facility and are attacked by various mutated zombies including Bill Moseley and Weston Blakesley. As they make their way through the facility an evil presence keeps trying to stop them and separate them with a view of killing them off one by one. It transpires that the evil in the institute is a fallen and outcast angel or seraphim that appears to be frozen in ice . Despite being frozen 1000m underground it's casting an evil spell over anybody nearby and weak enough in an attempt to escape the institute. If the seraphim can get out of it's temporary cell it can endanger the entire world but first it needs a host body. Unbeknown to the special ops team from the start, Ron Perlman, whom they are trying to save is the chosen host for the fallen angel which puts an additional complication in their way, mind you, the story that Dr Cardell has weaved isn't all that true and honest anyway so an extra complication is nothing. Along the way the team encounter weird visions, random temptations and even Henry Rollins who's playing a priest.

The acting in this isn't by a long way convincing, it's actually Ron Perlman that seems the most convincing and he's only in 15% of the film, by contrast Henry Rollins character is the least believable for me. The effects in the film look like they came straight out of home production with rice crispies and corn syrup used to show an infected character. The plot could have unfolded in so many better ways but didn't, instead it went for the cheap solution of random sexual tension, lesbianism, and painful memories. The characters are trapped and brought down far too easily, for a hardened special ops team you'd at least expect them to learn from their first mistakes let alone continuously make the same mistakes. Naked woman from porn magazines don't just appear in an underground institute!! Unborn foetus' can't suddenly be 10 years old, recognisable and in a top secret research facility without some motivation or set up!!!

Despite the negatives of this film I have been watching a lot of really poor films of late, perhaps that is the reason why I'm still giving this 3 out of 10, ultimately it's bad but it's not as bad as some of the other rubbish I've seen of late. You got lucky devil's tomb.

Watch out guys - the review saying this movie is "surprisingly" good - is being sarcastic! - it's actually pretty dead on if you're in on the joke - maybe I'm just slow, but I did not get it - and now it's too late - I've wasted my time on this pile of s...! I guess a movie titled " The Devil's Tomb" is never gonna be Oscar material, but I still expected some kind of dumb entertainment of some sort - but what a letdown! Only fun to be had is trying to keep track of all the dumb moves this crew of "elite" soldiers pull off. It's truly a special team Cuba Gooding has managed to form here - there's a rookie on board too - everyone makes fun of him - but he might just be the wisest of the bunch. Speaking bout rookie stuff - this movie is just so poorly made that it's impossible to get into on any kind of level! What I'm trying to say is: whatever You do - DON'T waste your time on this one!

What could go wrong in a movie starring Cuba Gooding Jr., Ron Perlman and Henry Rollins? Just about everything.

The narrating style at the start and end, like some sort of series pilot or something, was a dead give away. Both Ron Perlman and Henry Rollins just have episodic roles while Cuba plays the most unmilitary special team leader I have ever seen. And the plot is sickening in both the clichés and its stupidity.

There is only one thing worst than a bad movie: a pretentious bad movie that is boring and tries to fool you watching it through casting and other artifices of marketing. Only one thing could have saved this film: seeing Stephanie Jacobsen naked. It didn't happen.

Okay! So when does the real movie start? Hi, to whoever is reading this? 2009 has seen some pretty good comebacks such as “Righteous Kill” with Robert De Niro and Al Pachino, so in that sense I was hoping for such a comeback from Cuba Gooding. The guy performed marvelously in “Men of Honor” and showed talent in “Pearl Harbor” but when I read the plot of his last movie I got the shivers. “The Devil’s tomb” revolves around the idea of an elite group of soldiers that are on a covert mission to retrieve a scientist from an underground lab encounter an ancient evil in the facility. Hmm…kinda sound like “Resident evil” + “The Exorcist”, but what the heck, innocent until proved guilty as the saying goes. When I started watching the movie I was stunned at the silly plot, empty conversations, bad actors play , the bad effects and cheesy make up. The satanic element was supposed to be an attention-grabber but for me it was a completely the opposite. Its not that I don’t like these kinds of movies , I actually enjoy them but this time I was just …Irritated would be the right word I guess. The dark and satanic were completely lacking and what was left were religious zombies that spat goo on “elite” soldiers. It’s a low- budget project so that should be an excuse for some of the blunders but the actors just made me feel as though they played only for as much money as they received. They had no feeling, no will to make a good role. It was as if they had a hard time getting up when they thought of their roles. Even Cuba Gooding, of whom I had such good impressions, disappoints with his performance. The sexually charged scenes were actually ruined , in my opinion, by some disgusting moments ( the make up…) In conclusion I would like to say that this is a movie that will irreversibly waste one and a half hours of your live. Heck, the movie is not really worth the reading of this review. So, NO ,I don’t recommend it to anyone. STAY CLEAR of this movie even if there is nothing else to watch.