The Rig

In the midst of a tropical storm, the crew of an offshore oil rig must survive the rampage of a creature after invading its undersea habitat.

Although I don't think this film debuted on SyFy, it belongs there. It's of low budget, little original plot, and just all around lesser quality. I can say, thank goodness, this did not have the horrible special effects of SyFy (actually, some of the gore was decent).

William Forsythe is the alleged star, his name even appearing before the film's title. Well, that's a tough call. He's not the main character, and he is outacted by his mustache in a few scenes. So, unless you're a die-hard Forsythe fan, don't expect him to be the key to this film's success.

The DVD has a misleading cover image, making the monster look gigantic. It's much more humanoid. And there is a subplot of a brother story... for why? It's not important to the story at all, and adds a thin sentimentality to this film. Very thin.

The one thing I can praise them for is that this movie was shot on location at Charlie rig (now a museum in Louisiana). As far as authentic scenery goes, you can't get much more real than this. An actual rig!

This horror film is set aboard an actual oil rig--one that was the first of its type and is a museum today. A cute twist is having one of the characters actually wearing a t-shirt for the museum in one scene! On the rig, some underwater beast is disturbed and comes aboard to pick off the crew one by one.

"The Rig" is a low budget horror film with very modest production values in most ways. However, in two ways the film was quite outstanding--the blood and gore was a lot more realistic and profuse than you might expect and the musical score was great and really added to the tension. Otherwise, the film is clearly inspired by films such as "Alien", "Predator" and "The Thing". The idea of an alien slowly picking off members of a group certainly is NOT original and the writing could have been a lot better (the characters sometimes seem like caricatures and the ending is weak). It also suffers some from a few stupid clichés (such as adding nudity where it is pretty inappropriate) and seems a bit formulaic. Overall, the way I see it, if you like gore and low-budget monster films, you'll probably enjoy the film. If not, you'll probably wonder why you've wasted nearly and hour and a half of your life.

During a tropical storm, an assortment of badly written crew characters must deal with the rough weather as well as a mysterious creature who finds itself aboard the rig. Whenever 4 or more writers work on the same movie script, it's usually not a great sign (if said film is an anthology that rule doesn't apply, but this is not the case here) The plot is trite, the characters somehow cliché and bland at the same time, and the film as a whole is not nearly entertaining enough to make the huge detriments ignorable. An extremely dreary mess, avoid it.

My Grade: D-

Eye Candy: Carman Perez gets topless

Wow, can someone please give me the directors number as he owes me 2 hours of my life back. Easily the worst movie I've seen of late.

I'm not usually reviewer, nor a movie critic, but if i can save someone from watching this movie then I will have achieved some sort of personal satisfaction for the torture that I received whilst watching it.

The 2 positive things i can take from this movie is that 1)i saw some boobs and 2) it makes some bad movies I've watched now seem semi-bad.

Every facet of this movie is shocking from the script right down to the monster which is is a cross between an inbred raccoon an A-sexual dog on heat.

The acting is only topped in poorness by the dialog, which appears to be the script of a cheesy R-rated porn.

How this movie made it to DVD is beyond me, obviously someone in the cast or crew is sleeping with someone in the know how.

I wouldn't even recommend illegally downloading this movie. do yourself and your braincells a favour and steer clear unless you have a spew bucket and a swear jar handy 0.5/10

If you're wondering why, with a summary like that, I can only give it 1 out of 10, let me explain.

If someone can take a script this bad and a cast so poor and still persuade people to hand their money over to it, then, if you're an aspiring movie maker, you should be ecstatic.

It has absolutely everything bad you can think of in a movie: Horrendously poor editing; a completely pointless flashback to a few minutes earlier, in black and white to remind you (if you're a complete idiot) what just happened; dreadful, tinny low budget music to match the low budget set; and a man in a plastic monkey suit grabbing people in a quick blur of camera motion while someone throws fake blood around.

And dialogue that's so poor that if they had managed to hire a cast of decent actors they would have ended up shaking their heads at the inanity of it all.

There are some tits in it. That ought to double the viewing audience.

Give this one a wide berth unless you have the choice of watching this or sticking map pins into your eyeballs.