Ligeia

OK ... So it tried not to be a typical worthless neu-horror failure ... But it fell for all the usual things ... Drained colour flashbacks ... Naff unnecessary quick cut editing ( at times ) ... Acting that would make the local drama group blush ... And a storyline that could ( possibly ) have been interesting if it hadn't been written like a bad soft porn movie I have a feeling the budget on this was actually bigger than it looked ... Some of the settings were quite grand for a low budget film ... Unfortunately the director didn't know what to do with any of them How on earth do these awful directors and script writers get to make these films ... They are just a waste of time and money ... Everyone involved with the production I presume got paid ... Because that is the only thing this sort of junk does ... Pay workers As long as the financiers don't expect people to pay money to watch this dross ... THAT WOULD BE GOING TO FAR

I would normally give "The Tomb" about five stars, if only because it was made in a competent manner (i.e., you can hear everything, the editing is reasonable, shots are framed, etc.). But I have to deduct one star for being so blatantly derivative and one star for being an insult to Mr. Poe. No, wait...I'm taking another star away because everybody is just so BAD in this film.

The story is only minimally based on Poe's short story. I can hear the producer's now..."What? No children in danger? Add one! No sex? Add some! How does she come back from the dead? Through strength of will alone? No good! Add some satanic rituals and symbols. While you're at it, go find out how much Michael Madsen and Eric Roberts want for small, crappy parts. Nobody else is hiring them, so we ought to be able to get them for a song." (Madsen and Roberts have two totally irrelevant and shoddy roles in this production, but I guess that Madsen has to buy black hair dye somehow.)

What is more fatal to this film than anything else is that we just don't care about any of the characters. We don't hate any of them, we don't like or sympathize with any of them. They just sort of exist to deliver their lines.

As far as excitement, forget it. There isn't any. No nudity (worth mentioning,) no gore, no mystery, no chases, no fights (of any length or quality,) no shocking or surprising moments. It's just drab.

Overall, a very stinky film. Don't bother.

"We will never have to pay that price. We can live forever."

I don't know why I watch movies like these. They're clearly going to be awful. All the reviews I read further reinforced the fact that it was going to be awful. But, I still felt compelled to see it, anyway. And yep, it was awful.

The problems were myriad. The scares and horror aspect of The Tomb were surpassed by most of The Goosebumps books I read as a kid. The story was silly and bland. The attempt to appeal to the audience with sex fell flat with scenes that would hardly earn a PG-13 rating and had no chemistry between the participants.

The absolute worst things about The Tomb, though were the acting and the script. The entire cast was uniformly wretched, especially Wes Bentley and Sofya Skya. Sofya is certainly a very beautiful woman, but she would be wise to reconsider this whole "actress" thing. And Bentley came close to achieving the feat of making me never want to see another movie that he's in, ever. As for the script, describing it as "amateur" would be an insult to everyone who has ever been an amateur at anything in the history of the world. The dialogue is abysmal, and I can't imagine that anyone spent more than a few hours writing this.

I don't know what kind of dire financial situations are responsible for Eric Roberts and Michael Madsen being in this dreck, but I'm willing to offer money out of my own pockets to help them never have to be in anything this terrible, again. The only possible entertainment to be gained from The Tomb is from making fun of it. It's hilariously bad, but still too boring for me to recommend even for a laugh with your friends.

I really wasn't even sure what I'd use as a summary line ... but it kinda makes sense I think. You're welcome and no offense (if you are easily offended that is). There are reasons why one should like this ... based on an Edgar Allen Poe story with quite the actors to boast ... Cary Tagawa, Eric Roberts, Michael Madsen ... even Wes Bentley of American Beauty fame ... though apparently he hasn't done much since then ... nothing much succesful that is.

But the movie really seems quite convoluted and weird in a bad way. This is low budget and the femme fatale (if you allow me to call her that) is quite enticing. So I guess one may be able to understand the troubles our main character is in ...not to mention the supernatural element in all of this. But while this probably isn't that long, it felt like an eternity watching it - no pun intended. It has a few redeeming factors (some mentioned above), but I doubt many will cut this some slack ...

...but that's about it. I kept asking myself, "did they actually watch the movie before releasing it?" The thin plot line was all over the place and offered little explanation. Corny acting and dialog that could be barely spoken with a straight face. Confusing locations in the movie--tough to put your finger on where it was taking place. One minute they're in the USA, the next, they're in Russia. The electricity works fine, the suddenly it's not working and no one says anything. The movie is filled with tons of gaffes. Soundtrack consisted of a much too loud orchestra playing throughout every scene, (much like a Looney Toons cartoon.)

I'm sure the writers, producers etc, thought they were creating a masterpiece. Trust me,they didn't come close.