Skeleton Key

This is the flag ship film of Darkstone Entertainment and has been remade 2 times already. First one was a short film now know as Skeleton Key -1. Then came the first full feature attempt at the film on VHS called Skeleton Key 0. Now we have SK 1. The director John Johnson decided to go with a completely improvised script (that means all the lines were made up at the time they were saying them). The story is so crazy that it would take all day to explain the film. To sum it up is pretty much impossible. All I can say is that I can guarantee you will be entertained and at the end of the day isn't that what is the most important thing you are trying to get from a film. The film was shot completely guerrilla style with the cast and crew almost getting arrested by the local police for disturbing the peace. The extras are great as is the commentary. Try it out, you won't regret it.

OMG! This film looks like a home movie, but worse. The first comment, and only comment, I read hyped it up a bit, though I'm positive now that it had to have been the director or writer. There appeared to have been no post-production work at all done on this, so you have very bad lighting effects, abysmal audio quality, and just plain shoddy cuts throughout. If the first comment suckered you into watching even a few minutes of this film, please click the little button that says it didn't help you at all so that it will get bumped out and won't sucker more poor souls into thinking about checking it out.

I have seen some really, really bad movies in my time and this one takes the cake. Realistically, it should have stayed on the Internet and never made it to a real DVD. Don't even bother looking for this int he bargain bins at your local Dollar Store, since I don't think they're that dumb. I don't know how best to warn you about this so let me sum it up:

1. Sound - They appeared to have used the built-in mic on the $300 camera they shot the film with. Background/ambient music is campy at best, more like something you'd hear at a circus. 2. Video - Poor lighting, bad angles, no post-production, just plain home video-esquire. I've seen better fan films than this. 3. Acting - Non-existent, plain and simple. There are times when the "actors" (I really shouldn't tarnish the title actor by applying it to anyone in this film), actually stop what they're doing to see what's supposed to be happening. 4. Story - Not there, very choppy and jumps all over the place.

Do not waste your time with this poor excuse for a campy horror comedy. They tried to throw in a little kin here and there, but come on, even that doesn't save the film unless you want to see a little amateur boob action. If you do happen to become a victim of this film, please vote so we can bump the canned votes off that try to hype the film.

Man! I need to watch something good to erase the dreadful memory of this nuked film! Maybe a little YouTube action will help, since the acting and stories are so much better.

I love Skeleton Key. So many wonderful stupid jokes, insane characters and boobies galore.

Big stars be damned!

How can you not love this movie and everything involved with it! It could only be better if it were done by his superior arch rival, Delawanda Decrucio! Yes, it could have had a better lead actor like someone in the vein of Russel Fenton or a piece of wood, but even still, it works in the way that a drunken midget would amuse a houseful of nuns. Life is great because of movies like Skeleton Key and God bless those beautiful people who made it! Bravo!

I am not John Johnson.

"Skeleton Key" is a very funny movie. The people who squeezed the scripts for "Disaster Movie" and "An Amercian Carol" from their colons should watch before they try their hands at comedy again. Maybe they could learn a thing or two.

While I don't make excuses for indie films when it comes to technical incompetence--"White Zombie" was an indie film, "A Carnival of Souls" was an indie film, "Night Tide" was an indie film, "A Bucket of Blood" was an indie film, just to name a few of the thousands of excellent indie films that have been made since the arrival of sound in films--there's no point in knocking "Skeleton Key" for bad sound, lighting, or photography. Hell, doing that is missing one of the jokes, I think.

This is a spoof of horror films along the lines of "Disaster Movie" and "An American Carol." More to the point, it's a spoof of low-budget, indie horror films. It embraces it's cheapness and wears it like a badge of honor. In fact, based on other John Johnson films I've seen--like "Alucard"--I think some of the "incompetence" here is intentional.

"Skeleton Key" may not be a masterpiece, but it's also not as bad as some posters attempt t portray it. And it's far better than a number of recent Hollywood attempts at making movies along this line.

How can you NOT love this movie? Have I watched so many "bad movies" that I am brain-washed? No, maybe I have watched so many GREAT independent films that my mind has been opened to the awesomeness of low budget independent film. I think John Johnson did an awesome job with this movie. I laughed my ass off watching it the first time. And you know what? I laughed my ass off watching it for the 7th time the other night when I showed it to a friend. If you're so uptight that you can't relax and have a good time with this movie I feel bad for you. Sorry Matt Damon and Ben Affleck aren't running around high budget scenery dealing out jokes. If that is what you're looking for, don't look here. If you are looking for a genuinely funny movie watch this. John Johnson does a great job acting also. He pulls off what reminds me of a Bruce Campbell-like fighting yourself scene in the hotel room which I really loved. Neal, who goes from the bathtub viewer that's watching the movie with you to actually being IN the movie is hilarious and keeps the laughs rolling along. My personal favorite is Dr. Noches played by Jay Barber. He is hilarious and did a great job with his part.

I don't get why people complain about lighting and camera work. THIS IS AN INDEPENDENT MOVIE! Some of the best movies I have ever seen have poor lighting, bad camera work and non-famous actors. Everyone I have played this movie for LOVES IT! Maybe I am just lucky and have a very open minded, cool group of friends.