Transylmania

Not the worst thing I've seen, it has some good set design and the production quality is there. The color grading is fine but they did the cardinal sin of day-to-night, but it's fine. The dialogue and jokes are straight out of a bad American Pie or National Lampoon franchise. They definitely don't understand that less is more, but they're trying to rapid fire jokes so when twenty don't land, one just might. This could have been a fun 80s comedy horror throw back if it wasn't filled with awful 2000s jokes. I really enjoy late night comedies, I just feel this one falls flat, or in the case of nearly every joke in the movie, falls flatulent. 10/10 Perfect movie.

The moron American student Rusty (Oren Skoog) arranges a student exchange program for his closest friend and him to study in Romania for six months and meet his Internet girlfriend Draguta (Irena A. Hoffman) to have sex with her. He travels with the potheads Pete (Patrick Cavanaugh) and Wang (Paul H. Kim); Pete's girlfriend Lia (Natalie Garza) and his twin sister Danni (Nicole Garza); the naive and romantic Newmar (Tony Denman) and his easy and stupid girlfriend Lynne (Jennifer Lyons); the nerd Brady (Joshua 'Worm' Miller) and the crook Cliff (James DeBello). His friends actually intend to party and score the Romanians.

While traveling by train to Razvan, they learn that five hundred years ago, the vampire Radu lost his beloved Stephania, whose spirit was trapped in a music box. Radu has kept Stephania's body and has been seeking the music box to bring Stephania back. Meanwhile, a Radu's minion retrieves the music box but is deadly wounded by the vampire slayer Teodora Van Sloan (Musetta Vander) and he drops the object in a gypsy's basket. Newmar buys the music box and gives it to Lynne.

When they arrive at the university, they are welcomed by the Dean Floca (David Steinberg) that is a dwarf. Meanwhile Rusty meets Draguta and finds that she has a horrible hunchback and the dean is her father. Further, Dean Floca is a psychopath that keeps a torture chamber in the dungeon of his house. When Lynne opens the music box, she is possessed by Stephania and Radu is identical to Rusty, and the brainless American students get into a messy situation.

I have already written that parody movies are always of the type "love or hate" it, and "Transylmania" is no exception. I am not intellectual, I love cinema as culture, but also as entertainment, so I like them. Further, when I see this type of spoof, I know exactly what I am going to see: scatological jokes, funny and surrealistic situations and definitely a movie that will never be indicated for an Oscar. This is the type of movie that you must shut down your brain and start laughing.

What I do not understand is some comments of persons that should never watch this type of movie. What do they expect to see when they go to the movie theaters or buy / rent a DVD or Blu-Ray entitled "Transylmania"? An art movie, with hidden messages, an epic, a classic or a film with politically correct jokes? Honestly, if I did not like this genre, I would never spend my time watching it and writing bad reviews. My vote is six.

Title (Brazil): "Transylmania – Uma Universidade de Arrepiar" ("Transylmania – A Shivering University")

I don't really care for many comedies. "American Pie," "There's Something About Mary," and similar films simply don't appeal to me. I just don't find them funny.

Now, this is not to say that "Transylmania" was funny. It never made me laugh. But it WAS more entertaining and less frustrating than most comedies. The Hillenbrand brothers at least managed to keep the pace up through most of the movie. And they cheerfully steal from (er...pay homage to, I guess) numerous other films.

The sets and locations are decent, the animated title sequence is a bit more imaginative than following one of the characters around campus (as most films do), and you can actually see and hear what's going on.

The major puzzle is why it's as tame as it is. I watched the "unrated' version, which is basically a mild R-rating. The little violence and nudity is pretty comical, though the language can be a bit strong. The relative lack of nudity was also surprising. None of the extra-busty (or buff, take your pick) leads ever peeled down. And only a few of the extraneous characters ever got nekkid. Now, this isn't essential to a film like this, but it's pretty much the norm. Plus, if you're shooting in Romania, you're going to find lots of attractive actors there who are anxious to make a splash. I'm just surprised, is all.

OK for people with nothing better to do.

Yeah, sure...horror comedies are nothing new but usually they tend to have at least some elements from both genres. Transylmania is obviously not trying to be a horror movie, but it's not really a comedy, either. Sure, it tries, but it probably won't get more than a few chuckles out of you. That's what I don't get here. If you're making a horror themed comedy then you've got a ton of things to work with. This film just kind of falls on it's face at almost every opportunity. It feels like a bad mash up of all the worst aspects of a National Lampoon movie mixed with the eye-rolling stupidity of some of the more unsuccessful modern teen sex comedies. Simply put, it's just stupid...and not in a good way.

Yea. Yea. Yea. This is not everyone's cup of Joe but there is redeeming quality here. The actors are committed to the far-out gags, characters and the well laid out storyline. No one is winning awards and I don't care.

I wanted to laugh at some silliness in the vampire genre and that's what this is -- that's all. A splash of ta-tas, nice sword fighting, babe in leather (who should have her own TV show) and the look-a-like mistaken identify angle which is always worth a laugh or two.

The mad scientist/Dean sub-plot fit perfectly into a main story that went balls-out for comic bits, some worked, some didn't. So what? Pop some corn, kick back and laugh at the broad but consistent spoof before you.

Cheers!