Legend of the Bog

This film's main contribution must be that it constitutes irrefutable evidence against creationist notions of an intelligent designer of mankind. A truly intelligent designer would not just have provided us with eyelids to avoid watching this kind of rubbish, he would have given us earlids as well to protect our brains against the utterly inane and imbecille dialogue. Fortunately, we have legs, so at least one can walk away from what must be one of the worst movies ever made. It has NO redeeming features. It is not even bad in such a way as to be amusing or entertaining. It is just plain BAD. Inane, idiotic, imbecille, illogical, inconsistent...

I am a big movie consumer and I'm very tolerant with bad ones. I believe there is something good in almost any movie: maybe a good actor, a good scenario, a nice landscape, nice FX... something! Legend of the bog? I don't know... I couldn't find something like that! Bad acting, bad plot, bad scenario, bad effects... Oh, there is something! A nice forest and an interesting landscape... I mean the bog itself!

A movie without beginning, without ending and between... a very confusing, stupid and boring action, made out of unbound pieces of amateur theatrical performance! I've watched this movie with my 12 years old son, him too a "movie-man", and after about 30 minutes he asked me: "Do you like this movie? I think is as bad as Centipede! You said to me this is a horror movie!". Well... no comment! Still, we've watched till the end, only to see what happens in the end. And it happened... nothing!

So... it simply doesn't worth, watching the sky would be more productive!

I'm not going to bother to decide if this deserves a 3 out of 10, or a four, or even a 2. It was bad, so I'm leaving this comment at a 1.

Horror fans don't mind if their films aren't original, as long as it's done well. The genre is full of conventions, and originality occurs only with the smallest of twists on them. Fair enough.

The fact that the poster for this one has a big picture of Vinnie Jones on it - when in fact he's not the lead - if forgivable. Vinnie is always fun to watch anyway. However, just about everything else is poor, very poor.

Where to start? It's a film set in Ireland (outside Dublin) that has, as one would expect, a bunch of Irish people in it. And then there's the cockney "hunter", Vinnie Jones - along along with three Americans for good measure. One of the Americans is an evil property developer, building houses on the Bog.

Anyway, Bog Men can, apparently, be reconstituted when dipped into water. Okay, I can live with that as a horror fan. What i can't live with is the fact that the Bog Man make-up consists entirely of a set of bad teeth and a grunt. He wears an old kit from Giant Haystacks (if you're old enough to remember some classic wrestlers from yesteryear.

The film tries to tie up why these people are doomed to die, but it's never tied into the Bog story. Vinnie's character is one-dimensional and he's cruising through the roll. They (badly) CGI some flames at the end.

It's all so..... bad. The main thing it does wrong is that it's not even funny. It has sprinkles of humour in it that don't really work. It's not entertaining.... I was strained at the leash to tear myself away from the remote to turn this off.

Pity but this is a stinker, really poor. Oh well.

Sweet LORD this is without a shadow of a doubt one of the WORST films, let alone horror films I have ever seen, the cheapness of the budget shows more in the acting talent than anything else, with the exception of Vinnie Jones who puts in his usual performance as...well...Vinnie Jones. You would have thought he'd have developed some acting talent useful enough to broaden his range since LOCK STOCK but apparently not, he just grunts and mockneys his way through this heap like every other film unfortunate enough to be tainted by his embarrassingly unconvincing efforts at character realism. Also this film a lot of the time, especially for the first half doesn't appear to be sure to-be-sure whether or not it's a horror or an infomercial made for the travel and tourism board of Oireland, a lot of it seems to be jolly-begorrah panning shots of rural country or people going about their mundane business to the chirpy sound of Gaelic folk. The only saving grace to this joke is the on-the-floor-in-hysterics performance put in by whatever lunk they hired to play the bog man. He comes across like a supermarket trolley attendant lost in the woods on cheap speed, his facial expressions as he attempts to convey whatever the director told him to convey are priceless in their utter retardation, look out for a good bit at the end where the girl is squaring up to him, and for a minute he looks like he's building up to a really HUGE roar of fury, neck straining and everything, and then just suddenly looks confused, or constipated, a little embarrassed too. I'm totally in respect of the constraints in place once you've spunked most of your budget on hiring someone with some international kudos but no acting talent whatsoever to play one of your leads, but the least you can do is put SOME effort into redistributing the rest to good effect.

OK, to start with ,don't be baffled by Vinnie being in this movie cause the plot is so thin that u wouldn't even know is there.The acting is bellow par and besides this the actors look like they wanna get the hell outta there and take a break. How should i say it ?......if u survive the first minutes of the film ,which for a movie start are horrible, then u would waste 90 minutes of your life. This movie makes Far Cry look like an Oscar nominee , so no don't watch even if is free. The only guy who made me laugh is the one who plays the so called mummy who looks like acting for him is running , slashing , tearing everything apart and trying to look as dumb as ever. Too bad Vinnie is in the movie , i was expecting a lot more from both.