Blood & Guts

There is such a thing as parody and parody can be very bad and still be very good. There is such a thing as camp and camp can be very bad and still be very good. There is also such a thing as flat out bad - nothing can save flat out bad and this dreck could be submitted as definitive of flat out bad. Not scary, not funny, badly filmed, possibly the worst sound I have ever not been able to avoid hearing, This is the first 'movie' I have ever attempted to watch. Literally - this is the first movie I have ever started and then simply given up on. I made it through twenty minutes and realized there was simply no reason to go on with the movies and stopped watching lest I start believing there was no reason to go on with life. The people who have given this movie good reviews are either high or getting paid.

To illustrate just how low I will go (in several directions: Zardoz had moments of genius, Piranhaconda could be seen in certain lights as an act of cinematic wonder, any Chuck Norris movie features better acting, every youtube video ever features better filming, every Michael Bay film ever has featured better dialogue, Bad Taste featured genuinely funny gore.

Just don't.

OK, lemme just say this. The night before watching this movie me and a group of friends made our own little no budget intentionally bad horror movie with just video camera, toy shotgun, REAL dagger, and a Harry Potter cloak. I have yet to see the finished result, but I can already tell it's gonna be better than this movie.

I saw this sitting in the new release section, and from reading the title and the plot on the back, I thought "This is a must see!" I love 80s horror movies, even the low budget ones because of how cheesy they are! And to see a movie paying homage to it had me excited. Well, I guess my expectations were a little too high. It did have the good elements of an 80s horror movie (blood, nudity) but in my opinion failed miserably at comedy. OK, there were a few chuckles from me (especially the geeks, I gotta admit I liked those guys), but nothing side-splitting and nothing to make me laugh myself to tears. And with me hardly laughing, the movie just felt like any other horror movie, which isn't a bad thing, but even a hardcore B movie fan like me has to admit he doesn't want to see the same thing over again too much. Had it not been for the gore, nudity, lesbian sex scene (highlight for sure) and the two geeks, this movie would receive a lower rating from me

I wasn't expecting too much from this film when I watched it on Netflix. I think you have to have an appreciation for independent horror films to like this movie. The story was fairly typical a group of teenager get together for some debauchery in an old house then are killed off one by one. Very typical and classic formula, but it works. The soundtrack was good as well, I ended up downloading 7k album. The movie is shot in that low budget 80's way that makes it a little grainy/ hazy. The ending was great; it made me laugh, especially the little girl. I don't know if this movie is still available on netflix, but I feel it is very much worth your time to watch this. It is a little cheesy but the good kind of cheesy.

Who did post production on the audio? A deaf guy with no arms or eyes who couldn't monitor the levels? Christ the audio has more fluctuations than the last girl I dated, and she was a real doozy AT BEST. I've heard better audio come out of a squirrels tiny butthole with better clarity. They have equipment specifically designed for this purpose. Seriously, it was all over the place. Was like having 10 five year olds in my living room one minute and the corpse of my long dead grandmother the next. Do you seriously not see the levels pegging the red zone and not between 80 yo 100 percent, which is the audio standard for acceptable levels. I could give my nephew a vhs camcorder, 5 bucks and a box of twinkies and have him fart in a toilet and it would come out like Shawshank Effing Redemption compared to this drivel.

Seeing the title of this movie "Stupid Teenagers Must Die" made me believe this was a spoof of some kind. I discovered later on the original title was "Blood and Guts". Both titles are misleading, though. This is not a spoof, neither a serious splatter movie. This is something in between, failing in both areas. A group of teenagers is attending a séance at a spooky house and then the killing starts. Sounds over familiar, doesn't it. Well, this movies adds nothing whatsoever to the endless stream of similar movies. And it is badly made. Because of the lack of light the entire film is grainy. Now this effect can be highly effective, but it isn't in this case. The young cast isn't acting too badly, but the director has no clue as what to do with actors. In numerous scenes the actors are clearly waiting for directions, but these are given too late. It could also be an editor's mistake, of course. The characters are unrealistic and the story line just stinks. The sound is terrible at times: conversations are undecipherable, but when talking loudly or screaming the actors are very loud indeed.

This is not the worst horror movie I have ever seen, but it still is a bad one. For me a 3 out of 10.