Arrivederci Millwall

Or: Five Idiots Do A Bit Of Shoplifting, Get Into Some Scuffles, Go To Spain For The World Cup, Insult Everyone There, Get Arrested, Find A Gun... And you can probably write the rest for yourselves.

Amazing the amount the amount of clichés this squeezes into the meagre 48 minute length. Who, in this 5 strong gang will go off the rails first? Could it be... The quietest, nicest member? And what's the first sign he's losing his marbles? Perhaps when... He becomes a skinhead? For 'dramatic' purposes one of them will have to die. Maybe... The black guy? And don't look for a resolution, the word 'afterthought' springs to mind.

What exactly are we supposed to feel for these losers, anyway? Admire their bottle? Feel sorry for them? Bash our head against the wall while witnessing their sheer inanity? I'm not sure, the only thing I do know is that observing their primitive behaviour is quite diverting at first (A bit like a nature documentary) it does start to wear more than a bit thin towards the end.

At just over three quarters of an hour though, that's not a major problem. Just look on as the behaviour of a bygone generation, and that we've all moved on... (Wishful thinking...) 5/10

What have I just sat through?.....how did this rubbish ever get passed the writing stage....it is truly awful, leave it well alone.