Diamond Dogs

Judging by the comments here on IMDb, public opinion on this movie is divided into 2 distinct camps.

Firstly you have the salivating fans for whom the mere presence of Lundgren is enough to make any film a work of cinematic genius. If that's all it takes to please you, then no comment on here will change your mind. That's fine, enjoy your Dolf - try not to drool on him.

Then you have those who expect, nay DEMAND that any movie which features plot elements such as relics, temples and gunfights follow the big budget Hollywood formula of intricate death traps, load bearing treasure and near superhuman heroics which made the Indiana Jones movies, Mummy series and Tomb raider so successful.

This is where I begin to have a problem. The aforementioned films derive most of their entertainment value from witty one liners, flashy special effects and slick choreography. Diamond Dogs on the other hand goes in the opposite direction, moving the focus of the film away from elaborate action and adventure, on to the characters and their survival.

The majority of the film appears to have been shot on location and most of the characters (played well by a less than famous cast) lack the exaggerated personalities and convoluted motivations you'd find in a Hollywood blockbuster. The result of this shift is that the whole film feels more 'National Geographic' than 'National Treasure'. The sporadic action is fast and lethal, no fancy footwork and no coming back with multiple wounds for one last shot. The 'bad guys' are bad as opposed to villainous and the 'good guys' are played straight, behaving in a practical and decidedly un-heroic manner. I for one found the lack of comedy quipping a refreshing change. In fact the only thing that bothered me in the whole movie was William Shriver's portrayal of 'Chambers' which WAS admittedly slightly over the top toward the beginning of the film.

All the above waffle basically boils down to this; You want an action adventure romp, packed with booby traps, wisecracks and villains? Go watch something else. If however you think you could appreciate something a bit different, with beautiful scenery, an unusual soundtrack and a sizable (but rarely flashy) body count, then you could do an awful lot worse than Diamond Dogs.

Just another Seagal-Van Damme-Dudikoff type movie where martial arts, beautiful Asian women vs ugly Asian men, picturesque Oriental landscape and treasure hunt have been somewhat clumsily mixed into an action movie. Like in many movies with Lundgren, Russians are bad and greedy again... And of course, there are lots of fight and chase scenes so playfully resolved by Lundgren's character himself. In spite of his age (he was almost 50 during the filming) he still looks strong and fit.

The plot, directing and camera work have their shortcomings, but the movie is not "yawning", logic of the course is still there, the ending is not 100% anticipated and the length (1,5 hours) is just appropriate for killing time.

This is worth watching just to see how a 50+ year old man can still look like a 21 year old - Wow what a build the guy has got and still looks young too - Seriously jealous am I, it was actually worth watching just to see how some stars do not age and Dolph is definitely in the ageless Tom Cruise club!

Ok, on with the serious stuff - The acting is terribly terrible; so what's new but I did actually like the Kevin Spacey lookalike bad guy! Some of the dialogue made me mess my pontaloons! The story is boggo standard and many scenes are clearly influenced by the daddy of all adventure movies Indiana Jones but on a shoestring budget...nay even a sandal-string budget. The action fight scenes were woefully choreographed as though they were having a bit of a fun day out in the fields playing Japs and Commandos boys with guns but the photography, although it is wobbly and totally incoherent at times it is actually a bit refreshing and for some utterly inexplicable reason I did find some of the movie quite fun!

Yes it is dreadfully unoriginal and made on the budget of 10p and a bag of monkey nuts but it is different and I like different, I also like Dolph even though he cannot act worth a dime but he looks so good for a guy of 51 so I give it a fair 4 x AK47's out of 10 on my action-o-mometer!

I started watching this movie with some hope it might be somewhat decent. I am no expert reviewer at all, but I could tell from the very first scene that this was a spectacularly low budget film. Somehow, I slogged my way through the film. Our hero, Ronson, is a big ex-Green Beret O-3, who is down on his luck in Mongolia. THe film certainly looks shot on location, with Ronson competing in a UFC style fighting situation.

With the cheesy voice-overs at the beginning and end of the film explaining what was going on and the search for an ancient buried relic, I can say this movie is uninspiring at best. Some random fighting scenes, driving around in the Mongolian outback with some of the worst acting ever. Even some of the camera shots were awful, I could tell the cameraman was just walking backward as the camera jiggled with each step. I felt I could have done a better film in that respect (as well as the script and acting by most of the characters) back in high school.

I wouldn't bother watching this movie, its not even a watchable flick, IMO. I don't know how I sat through it.

A low budget, badly acted film............ everything about this film is poorly staged, wooden acting by C list actors and unbelievable settings, I'm still watching this as I write........... OMG so awful.

What more can I say, the scenes do not fit together....

The 'escape' scenes well, simply not believable.

Best line ... He's dead (immediately pull sheet over head LOL)

I'm still cringing as I write this, if second graders presented this as a home movie I would expect better acting (and sets :) )

Please, let me write this comment without having to make up ten lines about a film that doesn't even deserve one!!!!!

Even if you are desperate to watch a film, don't bother with this - paint a wall and watch it dry or sit in the garden and watch grass grow, so much more entertaining :))