American Pie présente: String Academy

Very poor entry in the Pie series. "Band Camp" didn't compare to the original trilogy but it still had some of that American Pie charm plus a semi-interesting story. It also had some funny gags and some funny lines. All that is missing from this fifth entry. "Naked Mile" had no really funny or memorable moments. No story. And a terribly bland, forgettable cast. While the original Pie films felt like a smart homage to the sex romps of the 80s (Porky's, Revenge of the Nerds, etc), this one just felt like a retread of the lame straight-to-video sex comedies of the early 90s (Ski School 2, Meatballs 4, etc). No real imagination went into making this movie. It was purely made to quickly cash in on the DVD success of "Band Camp". Of course many people will watch this just for the naked mile scene in which several naked female breasts are shown bouncing around. That's about the only watchable scene in this whole film. Sadly, by that merit alone most people will see this film as fitting for a recommendation. Trust me, it's not worth it.

The title says it all. I need to really screw my brain to fill the required 10 lines. The actors are completely unknown, the script is not that complex and it's rather bad. The mandatory opposition to the "team cool" is a bunch of evil midgets that somehow are better at American football and getting girls.

Storyline: virgin couple in high school are forced by peer pressure to go have sex with other people. It doesn't work and they get finally reunited. In the meantime a lot of teenage party and a bunch of people running naked for a mile.

Bottom line: uninteresting, badly played, nice girls.

1. Sorority girls like high school guys 2. Girls are willing to show their tits on command 3. Eugene Levy has a lot of depth as an actor 4. Lingerie/underwear parties are very common 5. You can drink where ever you want on a college campus 6. People find it hilarious when you walk around a party erect and even drinking games take place because of it—you become the life of the party 7. The continuing development of the pool table to lose your virginity shows the lack of talent by the writers 8. Girls love virgins and inexperienced guys 9. When guys climax they kill grandparents

Overall, this movie has some entertaining qualities, and if you are a male, you will enjoy the massive amounts of frontal nudity.

Perhaps I just don't get the movie business, but I never thought they could squeeze three more sequels out of this franchise just by naming random characters Stifler. So this time around it's some guy named Erik Stifler's turn to lose his virginity and get into misadventures, while in the meantime his interchangeable friends just kinda stand around and remind everyone his name is Stifler. They do that like, a lot. I think the name Stifler is said about every six seconds or so, and all these references do is make you wonder why you're not watching the real thing. Occasionally there's some vaguely funny stuff going on, like in the scene where the gang plays football against midgets, but whatever potential this movie had is ruined by the ridiculously awful dialogues. Even The Sherminator had cooler lines than the cool guys in this movie. The trash talk scenes have to be seen to be believed, and even then. And I can laugh at the dumbest, lowest, raunchiest things, but guys using their boners as baseball bats is just really unfunny. And also, why the hell is Jim's Dad still around? Anyway, this movie has a good moment here and there, but for the most part it's dull and very uninspired.

Eric is a Stifler, but there is one problem, he's also a virgin. Being a virgin and with the Stifler name is not easy for Eric, especially when his girlfriend is the one who isn't ready for sex. Wanting her boyfriend to be "sexually pleased" Eric's girlfriend gives him a guilt free pass for the weekend. Eric and his two buddies go the The Naked Mile, a naked run across a college campus. Eric's girlfriend then has second thoughts, fearing that this guilt free trip will eventually lead up to their break-up.

I stated in my review of American Pie: Band Camp that the series is quickly becoming a National Lampoon. This is ever more evident with the newest edition into the series, American Pie: The Naked Mile. Naked Mile and Band Camp never really reach the heights of comedy, vulgarity or even quality of the original films. Band Camp was a poor attempt at trying to cash in on the series most popular character, this time we get a bit of fresh air. The main character is basically the polar opposite of the Stifler or…Stiflers that we've known to love…or hate. The Naked Mile introduces more members of the Stifler family, including cousin Dwight, who is, yup you guessed it, exactly like every other Stifler.

Eugene Levy reprises his role as Jim's father, and serves no purpose in this film, just like he served no purpose in Band Camp. He gives advice to Eric about what to do in his current situation of a "guilt free" weekend. Which is pointless, because you know from the beginning what the outcome of this "guilt free" weekend is going to be. Norm McDonald is Eric's father and his very…very brief screen time is gold.

Much like the other American Pie films, Naked Mile tries to gross out it's audience, but doesn't come anywhere close to it. Aside from the opening scene, the film has no real crude humour. Playing baseball with ping pong balls and your penis isn't funny or crude. Killing your grandmother because you came on her? Alright, I'll give you that one.

Naked Mile shows a lot more nudity then the other films. You should expect this because of the title alone. For what the film is, it's not too bad. It doesn't try to be another that it's not. When a film has a football match against "little people" you can't really expect much. If Naked Mile had came out after American Wedding and not Band Camp, then I might have given this a lower rating. It just so happens that Band Camp is so horribly bad, that it makes Naked Mile look really good.

It's hard to recommend the film. It's not overly funny and isn't no where near what the original films are. If you were upset with Band Camp, then check the Naked Mile out, it's not as bad as you may think. If you can sit through a film that has countless breasts, childish humour, lots of drinking and a football game against "midgets", then The Naked Mile may just suit you.