Botched

i don't understand the fuss that people who disliked this movie are making. it is definitely NOT a waste of time if you take it for what it is - simple entertainment in the b to c movie category. the story is linear and leaves place for 90 minutes of hilarious slapstick-gore. the acting wasn't great, but not that bad, either, some of the actors are familiar from movies like blade, layer cake or dog soldiers. the music actually was really nice, with some cliché-Russian polka songs running along the funny chasing scenes. i'm pretty sure the b movie feeling is fully intended, for there are enough people that actually cherish this kind of movie.

altogether, if you don't mind simple down-to-earth entertainment with a little gore once in a while, you might risk watching the movie. otherwise leave it.

Good thing I have nothing against gore in movies. Because of that I had way more fun than I imagined when I rented this movie. It's completely hilarious, from beginning to the end. The overdone Russian accent without anybody ever speaking Russian through the whole movie, the weird characters and the twisted story add up nicely to a movie about one day in the life of one guy that just went completely wrong in every way you could imagine. I half expected a crappy ending to that story, but it fits nicely and left me with a satisfied grin on my face. However: If you can't stomach some gore, cheesy lines and over-the-top acting, then this movie is not for you.

While escaping from a successful heist of diamonds in an auction house for the Russian mobster lord Mr. Groznyi (Sean Pertwee), the driver of the runaway car crashes a wall and only the thief Ritchie Donovan (Stephen Dorff) survives. He runs with the wallet full of diamonds, but he is hit by a car and loses the stones on the street. The upset Mr. Groznyi sends Ritchie to Moscow to compensate his mistake and steal an ancient and valuable cross in the penthouse of a building with the clumsy Russian brothers Peter (Jamie Foreman) and Yuri (Russell Smith). However the plan goes wrong and Ritchie and his partners take a group of passengers from the elevator as hostage to the 13th floor. They negotiate with the police, but when they release the first hostage in good faith, they discover that their negotiator is not from the police but an evil serial-killer, beginning their night of terror trapped on the floor.

The gore "Botched" is an entertaining and forgettable dark comedy. The weird story has funny and silly moments, but something is missing to make "Botched" a cult-movie or at least a great movie. The jokes do not work well and it is strange to see the bizarre "Russian" characters speaking in English. The daughter of Billy Murray, Jaime Murray, is extremely sexy in the role of the executive Anna and shows a great chemistry with Stephen Dorff. My vote is six.

Title (Brazil): "13o Andar" ("!3th Floor")

Expecting a different take on a heist gone wrong I never imagined this would be the result! Very few people realize that it is very hard to do comedy. And a comedy that is dark like this one is even harder to do. But because of the actors and the gore fest it works. Bronagh Gallagher (as Sonya) is marvelous evil. And Geoff Bell (as Boris) gives a good parody on the "perfect" Russian soldier. I must admit that at first I thought that the phony Russian accents were too much. But soon when I realized which direction the movie was going I understood why they used these accents. Everything supposed to be over the top,including the acting! If you don't get that than you won't like this movie. But if you do you will have a blast!

I thoroughly enjoyed this film. I am a massive fan of the horror/b movie genre dating back to Evil Dead days, and this movie didn't disappoint. With a superb cast of non-Russian speaking actors, it was well done. The twists in this movie are well thought out and dare I say original for once. And the humor, well, it doesn't come any blacker than that. I was most impressed by the gore factor, it wasn't massively over the top like others make it out to be, i was quite surprised by how they sometimes went with "less is more" logic. Very well orchestrated.

A well chosen movie by Stephen Dorff. Keep them coming mate.

9/10