The Thirst

I'm something of a connoisseur of vampire movies. Even the bad ones are usually fun to watch. But this one... it just fell flat. Firstly, it's got nothing in it that we haven't already seen in a hundred other vampire movies. Second of all, I found it difficult to identify with or care about either of the main characters at all. They're not particularly interesting, despite several formulaic attempts to give them "depth." The only characters who are even remotely interesting or fun are the so-called "bad guys"--the vampires. Adam Baldwin, playing pretty much the same character he played in Firefly and Serenity; Neil Jackson, with whom I was previously unfamiliar, but marginally impressed; and Jeremy Sisto, who is clearly having a blast in this film, switching back and forth seemingly at random between a Russian accent and a Southern one (which was possibly the best part of the movie). Far from the first movie to have its villains be more engaging than its heroes, of course. But the problem is that the lives and histories of these characters--teeming with potential--are only just barely mentioned or hinted at. This movie could have scored at least another point or two with me if they had told it from the vampires' point of view, rather than the couple.

Fans of Buffy and Angel might want to give this movie a look, as it has no less than three former cast members: Clare Kramer, Adam Baldwin, and Tom Lenk (the other bright spot of the movie--he's hilarious). But anyone who doesn't recognize the names I just mentioned would do best to stay away.

I thought with the actors in it, and it's rating that it might be OK. I was wrong, here is what I though of it: Film Quality - Same quality as the Airwolf series (after they lost J.M.V.) Sound - Was OK, but you better keep the remote in your hand, so you can turn it up for the dialog scenes, and turn it down for the music scenes. Acting - The lead male sucked, the others I can't fault because the script sucked so bad. Special Effects - Not so special, unless blood really is that orange, and if all humans spray it from small skin injuries. Plot - What plot, it's certainly not what is listed for plot, because that scene was 15 seconds long. The whole movie is like a mix of a late-night Cinemax low budget movie, soft porn movie, and a Rob Zombie video. Wardrobe sucked (although the clothing seemed to magically shed the huge amount of blood that is was constantly being soaked with).

If I were a 15 year old Goth-obsessed boy or girl with a confused sense of sexual self, and thought about hurting myself or others, I might have liked this movie.

It's not the worst movie I've seen, but it's most certainly not a 6.7. Always remember to look at the total number of people who have voted for a movie, before trusting the rating.

MacGyver

Plot is about a terminal ill woman's last ditched attempt to keep alive, thanks to a late night visit from a vampiric nurse, only set back being she didn't tell her boyfriend her plans, so when he finds her months later dancing in a seedy nightclub after being supposedly dead, he gets roped into joining her new found vampire family. Then they decide to try kick the vampire urge by going cold turkey.

The "Requiem For A Dream Meets Near Dark" tagline for this was always going to be hard for it to live upto. And sadly though pretty obviously this doesn't come close to either.

But that said its a very entertaining horror film once it picks up, has bucket loads of blood, heaps of throw away laughs and enough twisted off the wall madness to keep even the most hard to please horror fan happy.

Great to see Fireflys Jayne aka Adam Baldwin turn up in a horror movie but even he's outdone by the thin white duke English vampire played by Neil Jackson (Duke is also in The Thirst (2006) by Tom Shell).

Director Jeremy Kasten is slowly but surely rising to the top tier of new American horror genre directors, hopefully this is a sign of things to come specially as his next feature is a remake of HG Lewis's Wizard Of Gore. One I'm sure horrorheads don't want to see messed up.

The Thirst gets a very respectful 7/10 from me, leaving me thirsty for more of the same.

I love all genres, but horror films have a special place in my darkened heart. I don't know why Starz didn't release this film in theaters, they should have. So many horror movies on the big screen haven't come close to the entertainment factor that THE THIRST provides.

Let me start by saying that anyone who rents or buys this movie expecting a deep thoughtful drama will surly be disappointed. You have to know what you're getting into and appreciate the film for what it is. THE THIRST is a 70's grind-house throwback with over-the-top gore and crazy characters that are much larger than life. Jeremy Sisto as Darius is the perfect example. The is not "Six Feet Under" nor should it be and his performance completely encapsulates the mood that this film is meant to express.

While many of the reviews I have read complain that the plot is thin, I amply disagree. This is a low budget horror movie people! The plot is great... a girl dying from cancer decides to save her life by becoming a vampire. Her boyfriend follows and they discover that "the cure is worse than the disease". Very simple, perfect for the genre. Too much more and we wouldn't be able to get to the fun stuff, which is what this movie is all about!

Clare Kramer is sexy from her first moment on screen. Her acting is superb.

Jeremy Sisto never disappoints and although I wasn't sure what he was doing with his accent, I found him to be funny and scary all at the same time.

My favorite performance was relative newcomer Neil Jackson. He plays the role of Duke and while I wish he had more screen time, his moments were some of the best!

For those of us who like to see body parts ripped off and blood spurting everywhere, this film doesn't disappoint! And the large amount of nudity was much appreciated and didn't feel too forced.

I laughed a lot during this film and even felt scared a few times (could have been more scares for my taste).

Overall, if you like the genre, I think you will like this movie! If you are one of those people who complain about too little character development in a movie that is 75% blood and guts, get over yourself and go rent "Sideways". But if you want a fun, blood-drenched good time, get THE THIRST!

This film had a fair amount of nudity in it (I have nothing against that :) ) and some very bizarre/bloody scenes. If you are rating this movie for plot, acting, special effects, etc, and overall entertainment value amongst mainstream movies, this film is a failure. If you are looking for weirdness, blood, and nudity (almost all female), then perhaps this movie is for you... but even from that perspective it isn't that great.

Plot: C-, Nothing new. There are not really any amazing twists to the story. It's vampires. Most people have seen a vampire movie or two, and this one is not overly unique in terms of plot.

Acting: D+, It's pretty terrible. I think the best acting performance is done by the main female character, and she was nothing that great. The main dude was a bad actor. He got better towards the end of the movie, but a 100% improvement wouldn't even be saying much. Most everyone else was bad. Some of the actors were even annoying. I am not sure if this was the role they were given or their acting skill.

Special effects: C-, The most prominent effect in this movie was obviously the blood. It seems like every 10 minutes it's a bloodbath. To say it looked fake gives a summary of the quality, but specifically, it looked like anytime someone was injured a pipe of red water just exploded and sprayed all over the place. Ridiculous. The other effects in the movie were pretty crappy too.

Character development: D+, There was clearly an attempt at this, as some characters do undergo radical change in this movie, and so one could argue that this movie aspect is better than what I'm indicating. I think the poor acting really killed it for me. A good movie conveys characters in such a way that you understand what they are all about, and you either identify with them or you have some strong opinion about them. In this movie, it's hard to really care.

*BEST aspect of this movie: The nudity, cause not much else was worthwhile.

*WORST aspect of this movie: You don't care about the characters. Their strangeness combined with the bad acting and some other factors prevent you from really identifying with or at least having a strong opinion of the characters.

*OVERALL: I really like vampire movies, and that's why I rented this one, but it was bad. It was annoying in many parts. The characters sucked. The effects were bad. Besides a few redeeming scenes and the aspect I marked as the best movie aspect, it had little to offer.