Crossover

Do you like crossovers? Then do I have the movie for you! It is called Crossover. When I heard they were going to make a movie called Crossover I started practicing my crossover like everyday. When the movie came out I brought my rock to the theater and crossed-over all these dudes in line, it was hilarious. Then I crossed-over the popcorn dude. I got the Producer's Pick, you know, a hot dog and a large soda, then I crossed-over that too. Then in the theater this guy started talking on his cell phone, you know what I did… Yup! Crossover!!! Shut him up real good. EDITOR'S NOTE: The basketball scenes in Teen Wolf are better than the basketball scenes in Crossover. Crossover.

For all who have cried for quality urban film-making free from gangsta, thuggin, and drug related themes…keep looking.

Detroit is a city rich in culture, history, ethnicity and empowerment but in recent years has developed an unfortunate reputation that upsets many natives. Those with a voice, the politicians, the rappers, even the filmmakers try desperately to reverse that negative image much to their credit. Writer and Director Preston Whitmore II, a loyal patriot indeed, attempts an urban tale about street ball, dreams fulfilled, and dreams deferred. It seemed like every few minutes there was a needless montage of city landmarks that were not part of the storyline. A gimmick that seemed patronizing at best, insulting at worst. I too love my city and I understand patriotic sympathies. However, they simply have no place on the celluloid. If a filmmaker wants to show the good of the city make a good movie! But that was just part of my problem with Crossover. It wasn't dramatic enough to be taken seriously and not funny enough to be a comedy. The funniest thing in the movie was the main character Tech (Mackie) spending half the movie studying for his GED. The plot was mediocre and the acting simply ghastly. Wayne Brady (who said he could be a leading man?) has to prove he's black to all his critics and quite unconvincingly portrays Vaughn, part businessman, part thug who has more than a legitimate interest in street ball. The cookie monster is a scarier underworld figure. Wesley Jonathan who was absolutely priceless in Rollbounce was less than thrilling-- almost boring. And Eva Pigford's play acting of the femme fatal just ruined a character that might have been interesting.

Crossover (or Crapover as I was calling it by the end) was a film that probably looked good on paper but lost its focus somewhere between the pitch and the production. I often advise urban screenwriters to beware of this potential peril. It's a death sentence to the film, but more importantly it is another unwanted blemish on the genre of film that is blemished enough.

Why?

Because everybody in the entire world would be able to create a better movie than this. I saw this movie because comments on this site. I didn't believe my own eyes! A drunk monkey would surely have done a better job than the writers & actors in this movie.

WATCH this movie and be AMAZED... Please do, i beg you! Actually i DARE you! Then you can say to yourself, "Hey, at least i will never watch anything this terrible again"

And people... Try to avoid hitting yourself in the head, while watching it. I had a hard time doing that.

someone asked? Hmm... Where should I start? Well, let's start with the blueprint: screenplay.

The dialogue was on-the-nose, predictable babbling about nothing. The jokes were even worse. The characters were less than one dimensional while accomplishing all sorts of inconsistencies, which attributed to outrageous behavior. I mean, at one point, the main character was just having a nervous breakdown for absolutely nothing, for the sake of drama. The plot was as believable as Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer. And even with the absurd plot, the writing failed to be original at all levels. I mean, we saw the same subplots done before in way more superior films like "White Men Can't Jump".

The directing was Amateur night at the Apollo. He did nothing with the camera or the blocking of the actors to make me believe he has an ounce of talent in his body. And the shots were so flat and uninteresting. I hope they shot the movie on HD. I'd hate to think one can make film stock look so bad.

The acting was the worst. Inappropriate and unjustified outbursts of anger, straight line readings off the page and so much wooden actions/reactions that it started to look like a smörgåsbord for termites.

And the basketball playing was terrible, even from the actors who are known for basketball, like Hot Sauce. They made a big mistake trying to pass off Anthony Mackie as some ballplayer. He looked uncomfortable with the basketball every time he touched it. I had a hard time watching him.

Uneventful montages. Glossy cinematography looking like someone's home VHS camera. Lame jokes. Inept editing.

You know when you have watched a bad film? When you're a passionate cinephile and after watching the film, it was so bad, you're left with a temporary bad taste in your mouth for movie making since the beginning of time. This film is that bad.

You know what's funny? I'll tell you...this movie. Once again drum roll please....Or, should I say DRUMLINE please. Drumline type movie that bombed like all of the rest. Nothing was good about this movie except the end credits where some persons name was my name and it made me as giddy as a school girl. I thought I was renting a movie about a poltergeist, but that didn't happen. But I was wishing that I was in the grave at the end of it. It's kind of strange that director's would take on something of this crappy caliber and try to make something of themselves. Writing was dumb, actors were...you know, and the scenes just made me want to take a bath and scrub myself from all of the bull that I've encountered.