Nom de code: The Cleaner

I have no idea why I rented this film. It must have been the name Lucy Liu. This type of comedy is not something I like, though it probably will appeal to some.

The Cleaner from 2007 stars Cedric Kyles, Lucy Liu, and Nicolette Sheridan. Jake (Kyles) wakes up in a hotel with a dead body next to him. He has no memory of who he is or what he's doing in the hotel.

Then he meets a beautiful blond, Diane (Sheridan) who claims to be his wife. When he goes to a restaurant, the waitress (Liu) pours a pitcher of cold water on him -- he doesn't remember having any relationship with her, but she's plenty angry.

Slowly he starts to realize that he was a secret agent undercover as a janitor, and that his enemies want something he has.

To be honest, the outtakes shown at the end were funnier.

Cedric the Entertainer, as he is called, is funny with a nice presence, but this movie was just a lot of slapstick and shootouts. Lucy Liu was sexy and tough in her role -- it turns out she's an agent.

There just wasn't much to it as far as humor. Mark Dacascos is so handsome, it was almost worth watching it for him.

I don't have too much to say -- if it weren't for the fact that Nicolette Sheridan prances around in her skimpy underwear, a five year old might enjoy this movie.

Cedric the Entertainer is certainly a talented comedian, but with a script this boring and stupid, even he couldn't breathe life into this horrible mess of a comedy. Despite the bad reviews, I was still slightly eager to check out the movie. The year has just started and already I have a candidate for the worst movies of 2007. The spy comedy has been done to death. And the fact that the writers had nothing new to bring to the table didn't help. I must've chuckled a total of 5 times, and received no laughs whatsoever. As the movie (thankfully) approached its conclusion, I jokingly thought to myself, "This is probably one of those flicks that contains a gag reel over the closing credits." Well...I was right! I frequently disapprove of gag reels over the credits of good movies. When you show a gag reel after a bad movie, it's like rubbing salt on a wound. The only part of this movie worth checking out is Nicolette Sheridan doing an erotic dance in her lingerie. If the movie ever makes it to HBO On Demand, I suggest you just fast-forward to that particular scene, mute the sound, and watch it in a loop. Yes, it's that friggin' hot! As for the comedy, expect your usual assortment of bland, crude, sitcom-style gags. If you can't see the punchlines to each gag coming a mile away, you might want to consider getting a cat scan. In one scene, a janitor (one of Cedric's co-workers) is interrogated by a federal agent in a restroom. The agent points a gun at him, urging him to give him some information about Cedric's character. The janitor is an aspiring rapper, and goes on a whole rant about how he wants to be shot, since he wants to be the first rapper to write his songs while in a coma. He bends over, begging the agent to shoot him in the backside. The agent eventually leaves the restroom, as the janitor keeps screaming out, "Put a bullet in my a**! Put it in my a**! Put it in my as**!" And--guess what--one of his fellow janitors strolls into the restroom as he continues to scream out, "Put it in my a**!" Unless you're a teenager who will laugh at all things scatological, you might want to consider putting a bullet in your own rear end for finding an outrageously stupid gag like that funny. My God! How screenwriters actually get paid to write this crap still boggles my mind! A man of Cedric's talent is capable of doing much, much more, as he's shown in the "Barbershop" movies. But when given rotten material like this, he attempts to mend each failed joke with improvisation, which in turn makes the jokes even more annoying.

For a James Bond prototype, this isn't that bad. One of the few that deserve more attention then they really get. The only other 'Bond' prototype that is as funny as this one would be Johnny English. Yes, we all have seen the plot, but it's the twist to the storyline that keeps it interesting. This time our hero wakes up in a hotel room, on the bed next to the dead man's body. It starts out more of a mystery, then quickens the pace just before the half way mark comes. Cedric is clearly at the top of his game both pyhsically and in his jokes. For sure he does a better job at keeping his material censored, heck, depending on the child, this could even be a kids movie.

Ever since Cedric the Entertainer burst onto the scene with his critically acclaimed, scene-stealing performance in the original "Barbershop," no filmmaker has quite figured out how best to harness the considerable talents of this longtime standup comic. In the years since that film was released, C the E has appeared in one monumental turkey after another, with his latest endeavor, "Code Name: The Cleaner," marking what we can only hope will be a professional low point before he begins his gradual ascent back towards some degree of cinematic respectability.

In what is clearly one of the lamest, dopiest and most ill-conceived spy comedies in movie history, Cedric plays an amnesia victim who wakes up in a hotel room next to a dead FBI agent and a suitcase stuffed with hundreds of thousands of dollars. Unsure of who he is - the possibilities range all the way from an undercover spy to a local janitor - or how he managed to get himself into such a predicament, the mystery man, Jake, is soon on the run from unknown forces out to nab him and the valuable computer chip it is believed he has in his possession.

This is such a perfectly ridiculous piece of celluloid-wasting cinema that it is scarcely worth the time it takes to watch, let alone comment on, the movie. Suffice it to say that Cedric needs to start looking into getting himself a better agent, while his co-stars - like Lucy Liu, whose career is clearly in as much trouble as Cedric's - should begin deleting this film from their professional resumes as quickly as is humanly possible.

I had seen the trailer for "Code Name: The Cleaner". It looked like a spy spoof. However, more importantly it starred very hot movie starlets Lucy Liu and Nichollette Sheridan ("Desperate Housewives"). Gathering from the trailers Cedric the Entertainer's character is suffering from some sort of amnesia. He finds out he has a white wife played by Nichollette Sheridan and a mansion. Cedric the Entertainer says, "I must be Lionel Richie." I thought that was hilarious. However, I am old. Audiences today are more familiar with the arrests and eating habits of his daughter Nicole Richie. Thus, this is the inherent miscalculation of "Code Name: The Cleaner". The movie was probably funny to those making the movie, without a tangible audience in mind. Too bad. I really like Cedric the Entertainer—he is funny. But he is so off the mark here. Sexy Nichollette Sheridan is whacked out as the femme fa-tale Diane posing as Jake's (Cedric the Entertainer) wife. The only thing that could have saved the movie is if her lingerie mysteriously slipped off her stunning body. Really, too bad. Lucy Liu looks fabulous and looks killer in the marital arts action sequences. Her fight scene with Sheridan could have been a lot longer. Also, too bad.

There is little redeeming in "Code Name: The Cleaner" other than its stars. For that blame the lameness of Director Les Mayfield and the horrendous writing of Robert Adetuyi and George Gallo. The tell tale symptom of this miserable collapse is that the most entertaining part of the movie are the outtakes at the end. Seems at least the cast and crew were having fun. One can only hope that there is more of Cedric, Sheridan, and Liu in the DVD release. Don't hold your breath.