Prehistoric Terror

Plenty of action for fans of these big mutated bug creature movies. Since the focus is just to showcase the inflated insects chasing and feeding on screaming extras, the feeble plot full of familiar devices really doesn't hurt. It's low budget stuff all the way, but fun.

Many Sci-Fi channel flicks like to mix some "bad victims who deserve to die in a poetic justice way and you can't wait until they get it" with some "good innocent victims in the wrong place at the wrong time who ought to live but some of them don't" types. This routine of course insures plenty of blood, and so it is this time: crooks want to get at some valuable jewels or something underground in a mine somewhere, and trick a guy into leading them to it. Said guy has teen daughters, etc. Guess what? You'll never guess! Giant bugs are there, too! The bugs are cheaply rendered, the CGI animation look like somebody glued a magazine photo of a bug on your TV screen, and slid it around with a pencil.

Familiar territory, and most of the actors failed Drama 1A. But it still can entertain if you take it for what it is, campy fast food b-budget sci-fi/horror.

I see the beginning of a beautiful friendship: sci-fi recipe films and cheap Romanian actors and studios. I actually watched this to see what Romanian actors would do and, unfortunately, they all did horribly. I can't really say that Monica Barladeanu played badly, given that the scenes with her were either she looking beautiful, looking interested and nodding to what a guy is saying, either screaming. Marius Chivu wasn't completely awful either. Colm Meaney was his usual self, demoted from starship engineer to silly bad guy, while everybody else just played stupid, unrealistic roles and stinking at it.

OK, the plot: giant bugs live underground, but they only get out when Americans come near the cave. It's a natural mutation that occurred somewhere in ancient Egypt, so maybe they are attracted to Jews, not Americans. Anyway, these smart bugs realized that living individually, having a normal size and eating dung is not a good way of life, therefore they elected a queen, covered her in expensive jewelry and proceeded on obeying her every command. Come on! There is no plot! Giant bugs, stupid weapons, women screaming, some entrails and blood, bugs stick together for the explosive finale, the end.

Conclusion: not even cult status bad. It's a mediocre type of film, the kind of movie where all extras are Romanian, but have German or French names for whatever reason. Stay away from it.

I saw this movie and while it wasn't really too bad for this genre, I had problems believing a few things:

1: The main character is a very good caving expert but they go into this very "perilous" caved in mine with out basic safety gear like helmets.

2: After 58 years, the power is still on in the mine and the lights still work. This was lucky because nobody seemed to be carrying any torches or lights.

3: After 58 years, this mine, beside a lake, has no water in it.

4: The second thing that they all do, after turning on the lights, is to jump on this rickety old wooden elevator to descend 2000 feet. This seems foolish to me especially for some caving "expert".

5: The two-way radios do not look like low frequency cave radios and their reception seems really really good after going through 2000 feet of rock?

6: Can you really get these rocket-propelled anchors that you can shoot into rock that will then hold firm enough to swing from? If so, shouldn't you test them before using them to swing across an abyss?

7: Why does a "caver" need a rocket-propelled emergency beacon?

8: The main character carried a very small back-pack. It seemed barely big enough for the rocket-propelled anchor with about 15 feet of rope, rocket-propelled emergency beacon and explosives that he took. I am not an expert but I would have taken more caving equipment like torches, ropes, helmets, slings, harness.

9: Why do the "laser rifles" need to be cocked (but not reloaded) every now and then? Where does the rock go when it is disintegrated?

10: I didn't know that emeralds actually generated their own light. But they looked pretty.

11: I saw baby monster beetles coming out of a dead mans mouth. If the young are only 2 inches long, then why are the eggs nearly a foot long?

12: Why kill the old man if that meant that they would only be able to make one trip down the mine to get emeralds? Why not leave him alive and sneak down as many times as they wanted and get as many emeralds as they wanted? Why are the bad guys so dumb?

13: Why kill Colm Meanie before he has helped carry emeralds to the surface?

14: Who keeps a loaded shotgun hanging on their living room wall?

In all sincerity, I really like finding a movie with this many gaffs.

Plot

Disguised as extreme adventurers, a group of high profile thieves unknowingly lead a group of wealthy tourists on an expedition through an abandoned salt mine that is guarded by ancient creatures.

Cast

Christopher Atkins stinks up every scene he's in, which is sadly most of them. Veteran Colm Meaney looks very out of place and Angela Featherstone and Chelan Simmons both deserve better.

Verdict

When you go in to a Scyfy Original you need to know something, you're likely in for a 90 minute migraine caused by bad writing, awful cgi and more goofs and inconsistencies than you could possibly imagine. Why do we put ourselves through them? I'll let you know when I've figured it out myself!

Caved In is one of the worst I believe I've seen, it doesn't even have the novelty factor of those of the past decade or so and their insistence on combining things to make a premise such as Piranhaconda, Arachnoquake, Ghost Shark, Dragon Wasps etc. A group of people go into a long since boarded up mine which is mysteriously illuminated and face off with giant awfully animated bugs, throw in a sideplot about criminal element and the obligatory goofy kids and you have Caved In.

Awful head scratching stupidity.

Rants

I must applaud user cbrow on his review and list of goofs, there's stuff in there I hadn't even picked up on and demonstrates further that Scyfy can't think much of their audience, either that or they are just dumber than a pierced bag of farts.

The Good

Meaney and Featherstone are always appreciated

The Bad

Goof after goof Dreadful cgi Lead has no place in the industry, he's that bad.

In 1948, a group of miners finds a gallery full of emeralds in a salt mine in Switzerland, but they are attacked by giant black beetles and only one of them survives. In the present days, the explorer John Palmer (Christopher Atkins) is ready to take vacations in Greece with his family when he is contacted and invited by a stranger called Vincent (Colm Meaney) to lead his team in an expedition into a mine in Switzerland. In return, Vincent offers a large amount to John and the cottage nearby a lake and the entrance of the mine for his family spends the vacation. John accepts the offer, and while leading the group underground in the tunnels, he finds that their ambitious leader Marcel (David Palffy) is a very dangerous man. When John meets giant black beetles in the cave, he orders the group to return but Marcel threatens the safety of his family, forcing John to lead the team to the deep location of the emerald mine.

"Caved In" is a B-movie with the usual flaws of this type of film, such as bad acting, silly lines, poor effects and a flawed and in this case corny screenplay. However, it is funny and entertains if the viewer likes those low-budget horror / sci-fi from the 50's and 60's. The blonde Chelan Simmons spends her time screaming and saying the most stupid lines of the story. The teenager Stevie Mitchell is young and has time to dedicate to another profession, or at least try to study how to act, how terrible his acting is in this film. Colm Meaney, Angela Featherstone, David Palffy and Christopher Atkins have good performances and Monica Birladeanu is extremely gorgeous. In the end, I did not totally dislike this forgettable film. My vote is four.

Title (Brazil): "A Caverna Maldita" ("The Damned Cave")