Shoot'Em Up - Que la partie commence

Clive Owen, Paul Giamatti, and Monica Belluci star in "Shoot 'Em Up," a 2007 film that I believe is a parody of the action genre. It has to be.

Owen plays a former black ops who helps a woman deliver a baby and then finds himself on the run with the baby as hundreds of people chase him and shoot at him.

I won't go into the whys and wherefores. I will only say that it is non-stop action, with Owen shooting in all kinds of situations - sliding on oil leaks under cars, having sex, sitting, standing, running, jumping, parachuting out of a plane -- he never stops. When he's not shooting he's punching, knifing, or slamming someone's head somewhere. Or eating a carrot.

Monica Belluci is the hooker he asks to help care for the baby as the two of them run for their lives, the baby in tow wearing a bullet-proof vest.

The body count is unbelievable.

Exciting, fun, bloody, violent, and preposterous, you'll be on the edge of your seat rooting for him to make the world safe.

Someone once told me that movies are made for 15-year-old boys in Taiwan. This kind of action film definitely is. You can sit back and watch car chases, thermal guns, nudity, you name it - you don't need to know a word of English.

Clive Owen comes up against Paul Giamatti, and the two actors couldn't be more different. Owen is deadpan and deadly, Giamatti is a showman who can play an evil character like this or comedy with equal facility. I understand he recently played, of all things, Hamlet, and received wonderful reviews.

I really hope Clive Owen plays James Bond. I think he'd be wonderful.

People who rate this movie poorly obviously do not realize that it is a comedy. If you go into it hoping for awesome action and realistic events, prepare to be disappointed. The entire movie is just completely ridiculous action sequences that not only would never happen but never COULD happen in any possible way. It's as if someone took every action scene that got cut from other action movies for being too outrageous or physically impossible and jammed them all into one movie. That is what makes it so funny! There were scenes with no dialogue that had me rolling with laughter. There aren't any dull moments either with someone getting shot pretty much every 10 seconds. The movie was not what I was expecting, but ended up SO much better. It's just plain fun!

I wasn't really sure what to make of this movie before I went to the advanced screening. I heard from a friend of mine at the Chicago Tribune (she's female, and you'll see why that matters in a second) and she said, "It was so stupid! It was like, BANG BANG BANG, EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE, BANG BANG BANG! Then gallons of blood and we move on." For some reason, the little boy in me that loved the scene in Predator where all of the soldiers shoot at open woods for a complete minute, got very excited. She wasn't kidding, either, that's just what this movie was. Don't worry about the plot, it's not really a concern. Don't worry about the script either, the lines are so over the top and shallow that you know a man wrote this script without allowing anyone to comment on it.

At the same time, this movie is just plain fun. You will find yourself laughing from the moment the movie starts to the ending (which you won't be glancing at your watch while waiting for). There are funny lines, funny situations, and stuff that is so impossible in the real world that you can't help but chuckle. Various moments during the film, I found myself applauding along with the audience, maybe not for the film, but for how writer/director Michael Davis got our hero out of another situation.

The directing, as opposed to the writing, was done very well, especially for a movie like this. If you take the directing too seriously, the script won't work, which is probably why Michael Davis did both. Clive Owen delivers another strong performance, adapting to the cheesy script and outrageous events like a participant in a prank or gag. Monica Bellucci plays the most serious role in the film, and still takes to mocking her life and situation in this movie like the rest of them. My favorite character would still have to be the sly Paul Giamatti, who is given some pretty crazy situations himself but they are coupled with the only lines of any intelligence (or longer than about four words).

By the end of this movie, I was having a lot of fun watching a plot unfold that I didn't really care about. That doesn't deter the film, though, because it's kind of like a stunt show, you're not really concerned with the story. I loved it and, apparently, so did most of the audience. It really reminded me of seeing, well, a live action movie that was more like a video game (we even have coordinated colors for the costumes of the "bad guys" in the various "levels"). I'd like to use this film as an example to my (former) favorite critic Roger Ebert as a perfect example of how video games can be construed in the same light as video games, because Roger, this is clearly a movie made by a large video game fan.

Given the choice, I prefer my action films to be as brutally realistic as possible, but if film-makers are insistent about going down the cartoonish violence route, they might as well go the whole nine yards, as in Shoot 'Em Up, a relentlessly OTT slam-bang actioner that starts out all guns blazing and doesn't call it quits until writer/director Michael Davis has thrown every possible crazy idea he can come up with onto the screen.

This wild, anything goes approach could be compared to the previous year's Crank, but unlike that film, which was crippled by unlikeable characters, unnecessary vulgarity and a glut of irritatingly showy editing tricks, Shoot 'Em' up remains a classy and often clever piece of film-making despite its highly preposterous plot: Davis's effective direction is cool and slick without resorting to migraine inducing visual gimmickry; stars Owen and Bellucci effortlessly ooze sex appeal and charisma, whilst Paul Giamatti, as ultra-vicious killer Hertz, is utterly loathsome; there are some inspired visual gags for the eagle-eyed; and the never-ending gun-play is both brilliantly inventive and absolutely blistering. Hell, the film even manages to deliver an ironic anti-gun message whilst all the bullets are flying and people are dying.

In short this film is everything Crank would dearly have loved to have been, and then some.

7.5 out of 10, rounded up to 8 for IMDb.

A film that aims to be a parody on the extremeness and over-the-top tendencies of the action genre, and succeeds in becoming entertaining and exhilarating. I doubt there will be a more entertaining piece of work this year. It was so over-the-top and hilarious. Some of it did go a tid bit too far for me (the firefight while jumping out of a plane, the fact that there wasn't a single cop to be found) but all of the wild absurdity combined with an encompassing metal soundtrack and perfectly choreographed action made it one of the funnest movies I've ever seen. The clash of Clive Owen and Paul Giamatti certainly added a great stride to it, with Clive's deadpan hilarity and Giamatti's winning charisma. It's this extravagance and extreme unrealism that makes the film entertaining, but can also be a flaw from time to time. But it is absolutely impossible not to have an uproarious time watching Clive Owen shoot an umbilical cord to separate it from the mother, kill numerous people with a simple carrot, and (in my favorite scene of the film) have raunchy sex with Monica Bellucci whilst laying out an endless supply of armed hit men. Certainly something I could see myself re-watching time and time again.