Un ado en danger

Due to insomnia - must be to many energy drinks or no decent Internet porn perhaps - I found myself watching what must be the funniest movie this side of " Tell Your Children: Reefer Madness" (1939) http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0028346/ Seriously people, I am reading comments on here by people that seem to be taking this film seriously. This is some sort of American in-joke - right? We have a family and school so concerned about a lad watching a bit of porn and - shock horror - it is inferred that he may even be masturbating!!! And his parents and school want to send him to a therapist due to his...um...addiction? (By the way, the constant energy drinks he was taking was bloody hilarious - "this is USA TV. We'll have no direct references to masturbation here. O no. Like a Jane Austin novel when a couple ...um..consumate their relationship and a red rose is described on a table, we will just show the poor bugger drinking an energy drink.

There were moments in the this movie that could only be described as coming form a creator who has graduated form the Ed Wood School of film direction It will send you blind you know - which is oddly what I thought might have been an improvement to watching this bile of old horse poo.

Here is this perfect family -- nice Mom and Dad, clean-cut kids. The 13-year-old boy is not only a good student but a star of his high school swimming team. He's got a girl friend, Amy, who is as cute as a button, and moral too, since she won't go all the way with him. He does a lot of homework and things on the PC in his bedroom.

Enter pornography.

The boy discovers he can find pornography on the internet and meet girls of questionable values too. He arranges a date with one of them, who happens to be a fellow student, and five minutes after their first meeting -- no, LESS than five minutes -- she moves from her side of the drug store booth to sit next to him, presses his hand against her breast, and asks, "Why don't we go to my place? My parents aren't home." Well, I'll tell you. Things just go from bad to worse. This clean-cut, polite, industrious 13-year-old kid becomes "addicted to porn," as his Mum puts it. He can't stop. He neglects his clean-cut moral girl friend, he puts off studying and lies about it, his swimming deteriorates, he gets up in the middle of the night to creep with a demonic smile into the family room where his parents have moved his PC.

He somehow gets his friends' names on some email lists and they get snotty with him, slap him a little, and call him a "twisted freak" and complain that they get a lot of Spam now. He begins -- and I know this is difficult for us perfectly normal adolescent boys to believe -- he begins to dream of beautiful half-naked girls swimming around him in the pool. It gets even worse. He swipes him Mum's credit card and begins charging porn-site membership fees to her account.

Not that he's all bad, though. He finally winds up in the bedroom of this high-class slut from his high school. She jumps him on her parents bed and begins tearing at his clothes. "Can we go a little slower?" he begs. "Sure. We can go as SLOW as you like," the nubile nympho hisses. But it's no use. "This isn't how I imagined it would be," he says, disappointed and awed by the too-frank advances of this Jezebel. She throws him out, his virtue intact. I don't know how it ends. I couldn't sit through it. But anyone who is able to take "Reefer Madness" as a serious description of a social problem ought to enjoy "Cyberseduction."

As for criticisms, I wouldn't really know where to begin. I guess we could start with the generalization that every 13-year-old boy who has ever lived on the planet Earth loves to look at dirty pictures and masturbate. Also a goodly but undetermined portion of females of all ages and mature, happily married men.

It's not even arguable. I've asked everyone I've met, "Do you masturbate"? First, lots of total strangers on the street, then the nice police officers, now the other patients here at the Institute. They all say, "Sure." If that isn't "normal" I don't know what is.

When I was a kid we didn't have PCs, just the bra ads in a Sears and Roebuck's catalog. A classmate of mine was caught using one of the photos in such an add for an unintended purpose and was punished by being made to memorize Tennyson's "Charge of the Light Brigade" -- every line of it. That kid is a doctor today.

Theoretically, I suppose, it's possible to take any normal activity too far, so that it becomes an obsession. (This could be a movie about a kid who decides to eat nothing but rib eye steak -- and lots of it. He can't stop because he's "addicted to steak.") The media have been doing their level best to turn the internet into a social problem -- just as they tried to do with Satanism, hypodermic syringes in cans of Pepsi, and missing children on milk cartons.

I don't know why it hasn't taken off yet. It would seem to be fertile ground. Here we have this complicated machine which maybe the parents don't understand much about. Mum and Dad probably know there are "chat rooms" hanging around in the box somewhere, although who knows what goes on in them. Then too they must be aware of internet pornography. All they have to do is watch a movie like this, and there are a couple of them floating around.

There's no point in going on about it. It's a meretricious piece of trash designed to add to the worries of parents who are already stressed out over second-hand smoke, peanut allergies, and trans-fatty acids. I'd start to think about it, though, if my kid did nothing but watch slasher movies and play video games in which over-muscled behemoths made each other's heads explode in a shower of glee, gore and glia.

Never saw such a one-sided, stupid, prude botch. The only thing they forgot to tell is that masturbating causes blindness. But then it isn't even necessary as the main character just stares, and stares ... but let's assume the movie tries to imply he's masturbating. Let's repeat: Watching porn and probably masturbating has several consequences, for example:

• You look old and tired: Every teenager not sleeping enough looks like that. What does a typical geek look like?

• You'll fail at sports and school: Can be true, but it's not a consequence of porn, but of any obsessive behavior, computer games or sports (yes, too much training can have an impact on studies, but then we in Europe don't have a tradition of giving sportsmen and -women a free ticket through higher education) can also lead to the same results.

• You want to sleep with your GF: Hell, which teen boy doesn't want to? I would worry more if he wouldn't!

• Your friends turn against you: LOL! Usually it's more like who knows the dirtier jokes in any normal school :)

I really like the earlier comment about his small brother playing GTA. It's true, his Mum doesn't care her younger son just killed a "drug dealer" (Lesson: we don't need judges anymore). Doesn't our society have more problems with violence than with sexuality? Let's do a piece of logic (it's as wrong as this movie, but let's try). Islamic Terrorists don't watch porn, it's an affront against their religion. Ergo: NOT watching porn makes you a terrorist.

Well, all the uptight Victorian people out there will love this stupid flick.

How can this movie have a 4 star rating???? I just happened to watch this movie on TV while trying to get my son to sleep...

I must say it's the worst movie I have seen in ages....

Internet Porn Kills!!! Was the message.....

wow.... Is this movie made by any religious fanatics???? Be afraid... be very afraid....

The young boy who finds porn on the internet (or at least some sites with girls in panties and shirts..) And then starts to mess up in school, mess up at home... and mess up his relationship with his dry girlfriend... And he start swimming worse in the swimersteam to!!!

When his mom finds out you could swear that she just found out that her son has raped and killed about 100 people... based on the reaction... but its more worse than that!!! he has brought porn to there house!! and its just keep popping up!!

i thought i would see some T:s and A:s in this movie... but there was NONE!!! so now i have to go pornsurfing to see it... And after that my life will be ruined and I will have to try to kill at least myself...

It's a fact of life that we guys are hard-wired to be stimulated by visual images. Women apparently find that objectionable, but I'm tired of apologizing for being male. This movie depicts a teenage guy with raging hormones and no other outlet for his sexual energy who turns to Internet porn. He's naturally curious about the female body, and the Internet helps him explore that interest. Like all hobbies, this one can be over-indulged, and when he starts losing sleep and doing badly in school, then it's a sign that he needs to dial it back a little.

How dumb is it that he leaves his door open while he surfs the Net? Especially after being caught the first time? His father should have bought him, for his twelfth birthday, a lock for the inside of his bedroom door, and talked to him (and the rest of the family) about his right to privacy.

I don't normally watch this channel. I wonder if all of their programming is this silly.