Snakeman

Here we have Snakeman, or maybe it's really some other title, telling the story of a nasty snake monster in the Amazon which has a penchant for munching on people parts. Stephen Baldwin, the not-too-talented younger brother of Alec, may be the Snakeman, I don't know. We can't be sure because the plot involves the snake monster eating everyone. It has nothing to do with a "snakeman". Why do they make movies like this? Because they get suckers like me to watch them, that's why. Terrible CGI effects only cheapen this Anaconda rip-off. Some of the gore effects are quite amusing, as when the gun-for-hire decides to pull his own guts out of his stomach after being bitten there by the snake monster. Think we'll see "Snakeman Returns", "Snakeman Forever", or "Snakeman: The Beginning"? Let's hope not.

This was one hell of a stinker. Comparing this to an early Dr Who episode from 1960's Who had the worse scrip: The Snake King Who had the worse dialog: The Snake King Who had the worse acting: The Snake King Who was more predictable: The Snake King Who had the most fake special effects: The Snake King (This is going against cardboard cutouts, men in wetsuits, and obvious miniatures.) The Snake King did have one advantage over the Dr Who episode it was in colour.

It does have a good drinking game if you have a drink every bad line or when a henchman gets killed you are more likely to pass-out from alcoholic poisoning than pass halfway through the movie.

I watched it on the sci-fi channel. I couldn't help laughing at the special effects and the story line. Stephen Baldwin was horrible in it! Bad acting overall from everyone in the movie! Sci-Fi should be sick with themselves about this load of garbage! The story goes pretty much like this, Some researchers go out in search of a fountain of youth that is supposedly somewhere in the jungle. But there is one problem though, to get to the so-called fountain of youth water they have to get past the deadly predator (the snake king), or should we say CGI King. The storyline as I mentioned earlier is totally silly, the snake doesn't even attack some of the people for some reason, what's up with that, maybe he knows them (they must be buddies! Come on, please!) Also when the snake kills the people, it looks ridiculous. Also you never understand why the snake has 3 heads. Please don't waste your time with this garbage!

Can bad movies ever get any worse? Maybe. But for the moment, Snakeman beats everything in its shear awfulness. The snake is just SO fake, even the one in Python would choke on its own tongue. The actors are bad, they couldn't act if there lives depended on it, even if they sold their souls to Sponge Bob Squarepants first. I don't understand why the many-headed snake is actually a good creature, it seems to enjoy tearing and ripping and killing people in various and imaginative ways, yet it gives the Mysterious Indian Tribe that Stinks its great gift of eternal youth... This mystifies me. The teams that are sent to the rather fake looking jungle seem to be well equipped with big and savage-looking automatic rifles, large vicious snakes are probably commonplace in the jungle... Not a good film, if it appears on your TV, switch the channel or it will take a little bite out of your intellect.

I was real surprised with "Snakeman". It was actually a pretty good little independent movie. First, it was well shot. The director chose to use film instead of digital (which a lot of B-movies) do. And there were some great jungle shots of the Amazon. Second, the movie was fairly well acted. I really thought everyone in the film was a pretty seasoned actor. Stephen Baldwin was definitely a good hero. Third, they had some real cool production design. They had snake pillars in the jungle. I love that whole look.

The only real downside was that there were some fairly bad CGI shots of the snake. But, it's definitely entertaining if you're looking for that whole "monster in the jungle" concept.