The Janitor

Hi, All Gore fans,

No, I didn't say Al Gore. All gore. Good gore. More gore.

This is a film that I believe was a remake of The Sound of Music but slightly different. This time Julie Andrews is a janitor who is played by a bearded guy. His partner is a Dick Van Dyke look-a-like but who sounds more like Howard Stern after gargling Pennzoil.

The movie begins with a clever title sequence, well edited, and has correct spelling. There is a killing before the title and then it becomes violent with nice music here and there. Good comedy seminal fluid inserts.

Costuming is very well done. Acting is superb, but does not detract from the occasional bloodspurt. Death scenes are funny.

Lionel the Janitor is sort of a combination plate of Jonathan Winters, Charles Bronson, Hulk Hogan, Leo Gorcey, Steven Segal and a touch of Shirley Temple.

His partner is more of a cross between Dolph Lundgren and Tex Ritter with a voice somewhat reminiscent of Mr. Ed.

This is a very funny slasher movie that is well made. I hope the team works on some more stuff soon. Perhaps a western.

Tom Willett

Poor Lionel is tried of taking crap from the workers in the building that employs his Custodial services, so he goes on a rampage mutilating anyone who looks at him the wrong way. Mr. Growboi s a fellow janitor who looks to Lional as a son and helps him cover his bloody tracks. However Mr. Growbo isn't someone you should spurn. With horror comedies, they either work or they suck. No middle ground here. Fortunately this one works, coming off as a moderately well acted version of a Troma film (Lloyd Kaufman even has a cameo). It's gory, has gratuitous toplessness, and is frequently quite fun. The character of Lional kinda reminded me of a cross between Peter Jackson circa "Bad Taste" and Orville Ketchum from "Hard to Die" and "Sorority House Massacre 2". My hats off to Andy Signore, TJ Nordaker, and everyone else involved in the production. You guys know how to bring a tear to the eye of a drunken jaded exploitative horror fan.

Eye Candy: Rachael Ann Bennett, Crystal LeBard, Stephanie Medina, and Tusdi Rodriguez get topless

My Grade: B

DVD Extras: Commentary by Andy Signore, John Carreon, and TJ Nordaker; a 58 minute Making of; "th Office is Closed" short film; Lackadaisical Music video; Photo gallery; Deleted scenes; and the trailer

2 Easter Egg: Bruce Cronander improvising & missing his cue; more nudity set to music

I don't know how anyone couldn't like this movie. That is, unless your idea of a good horror movie is "Scream." I was in a unique position while watching this movie. I am a huge gore fan, a filmmaker, and a former part-time janitor. As a gore fan, I enjoyed seeing all the obviously fake blood and guts being sprayed everywhere. As a filmmaker, I could appreciate how hard these guys had to work to put together this film on a shoestring budget. And as a former janitor, I loved seeing a fellow custodian murdering all the jerkwads that ticked him off.

And on top of that, this movie is hilarious. The script, the performances, the subject matter, and the guest appearance by Troma's Lloyd Kaufman...all hilarious. Even if you don't appreciate the cinematic genius that is "The Janitor," at least you'll find it funny. I showed it to a group of mainstream movie fans, and they all loved it.

I rented this movie from NetFlix a few days ago, and immediately bought it after watching it. I can't wait for their next movie to come out, and according to Andy Signore (I emailed him to tell him how great it was), it sounds like it's going to be another winner.

Give this movie a chance. Help some really talented filmmakers continue making amazing movies.

Blood, breasts, and cleaning products rain supreme in this soon to be classic film. Filmed with entertainment in mind, this gore flick has lots of sick humor! There isn't much justice my words can do. Just see it. This is is total B-Movie. B= best, breast, blood, bludgeoning, and bucket of cleaning solution. See it! The characters are unique and fun, the girls are hot or at least highly killable as some of the dudes scream like girls and get the plunger! Warning contains some of the best video ever seen of girls "having fun." Was seen when they first played this online. Is a must see film for parties and other large gatherings where feeding off one another's reactions makes it over the top.

The movie-industry has been due for a good slasher film for a long time. It seems the contemporary film industry has led the horror genre to fall into two clearly distinct categories: the M. Night recipe of infinite plot twists that confound the viewer and ultimately leave him unsatisfied, or the psychological horror tripe in which the climax is the protagonist awaking to realize that the entire ordeal was all a dream. These shortcomings are compounded by a level of seriousness that rivals Pentagon Briefings, which leaves the viewer mumbling "Bueller? Bueller?" in a vain attempt to make sense of where the last two hours of his life went.

"The Janitor" shines because it isn't meant to be taken seriously. Nor is the viewer expected to see it as a dramatic, break-through work that rattles the conventions of society while leaving the viewer with a single tear-trail on an ashen cheek. With so many first-time filmmakers attempting to take Cannes by storm with this cookie-cutter film making style, it would almost be prudent to call the thought process of first-time directors Signore and Nordaker groundbreaking. It follows: Slasher fans like violence. Slasher fans like dark comedy. Slasher fans like beautiful naked women. Let's make a film with violence, dark comedy, and nude hot chicks that would make my great-grandfather pop a boner.

And they have done just that. Signore and Nordaker have accomplished in their first attempt what many veteran directors have yet to achieve: they have made a film that is enjoyable to watch that does not, by any means, remain in the realm of good taste. And that is how it should be; similar to Raimi's early work, "The Janitor" keeps the viewer on the thin line between face-stiffening laughter and gore-induced queasiness. As the film begins to stray more towards one side, the filmmakers skillfully pull the viewer back with clever writing and savvy editing. It is clear that Signore and Nordaker have created a film that is both enjoyable and entertaining. It is also certain that the directors of "The Janitor" have a promising future in the film making industry. Finally, this viewer will ensure that he never forgets to put his office cleaner on his Christmas Card list, lest he stray to far into the custodial closet, never to be seen again!