Rottweiler

Spain's Fantastic Factory strikes again with this Brian Yuzna (Beyond Reanimator) directed hokum. Dante and Ula are playing infiltration (apparently a rich boy's game of sneaking into third world countries) and when it goes horribly wrong they are caught by the authorities and separated. When Dante makes a daring escape and then finds himself being hunted by the titular title character which is now more Terminator than dog. It eats everything. It destroys everything and it can't be stopped. How will poor Dante find his beloved Ula with the Doginator on his trail? Well where shall I begin? The script is pretty ratty even for low budget fare. Giant leaps in logic and plot inconsistencies are plenty in this tale. Unnecessary flashback sequences try to unlock or more correctly infer a twist in the ending but it fails to generate anything to sustain you that far. Things just don't jell in the end. The acting by the no name cast of Spanish actors is pretty straight as one would guess with a script that requires the lead to get attacked, shoot a shotgun, have sex with the local bimbette (while she holds a gun on him no less) and wander the desert starkers for 25 minutes you can't expect much and you end up rooting for the dog. The dog effects however are the only bright spot of the film as the kills can be pretty bloody and cool and the animatronic dog was actually pretty spiffy. Heck, the dog gives the only worthy performance here.

A fugitive escapes from a Spanish prison and is tracked down by a robot dog in the distant future. Oh, Brian Yuzna, why did you make this awful, awful movie? In general, I like the films he makes through his production company, Fantastic Factory. Faust, Dagon, and Beyond Re-Animator were fun, well-made horror movies. Hey, even Arachnid had its moments. But this…ouch, this was absolutely unwatchable. To start, it was boring as hell. The action was uninteresting and bland, the acting was often very poor, and the visual effects were crappy. Then of course you have our "hero" running around nude for about five minutes of screen time and one of the most tasteless sex scenes I've ever seen (I actually felt sick to my stomach during it), not to mention that even the gore is badly done and uninspired. To be fair, Yuzna gives the film a pretty decent look via desolate Spanish locations and the effects on the robot dog (From Vincent Gaustini, who was also responsible for the effects in Dogma, Requiem for a Dream and the made-for-cable adaptation of Stephen King's Thinner) weren't bad at times. Oh, and the opening title sequence was actually quite cool and creative. These three pros, unfortunately, do absolutely nothing to make the film more watchable. It's painful, terrible, and all-around bad.

Just don't see it.

1.5/10.

Brian Yuzna's directorial career started off well with the innovative and freaky Society, followed by a serviceable sequel to Re-animator and the excellent Return of the Living Dead III; but since setting up his own production company, Fantastic Factory, in Spain, Yuzna's output has been surprisingly bad, with Rottweiler being the biggest dog of them all.

Set in the near future, the film sees a risk-taking young couple, Dante and Ula (William Miller and Irene Montalà) caught by the authorities as they play a game called 'infiltration', which calls for them to try and illegally enter a country without papers. Dante is sent to a high security prison, but is soon presented with an opportunity to escape into the surrounding wilderness, where he finds himself relentlessly pursued by a savage, cyborg tracker dog.

Admittedly, the above synopsis sounds like it could shape up to be a quality piece of sci-fi/horror entertainment—kinda like Westworld crossed with Cujo—but that is only half the story, and how the plot develops after Dante's prison break is simply insane.

However, since the sheer unpredictability of the narrative is the one of the only enjoyable aspects of the film (the other main 'positive' being the gore), I'm not going to spoil things by revealing too much, suffice to say that you should prepare yourself for some unbelievably poorly executed action, including a silly chase sequence involving numerous shots of Dante's naked ass, the least harrowing rape scene in movie history, the hilarious sight of the dog disposing of a gun (twice), and a priceless shot of a surprised chicken that is easily the best moment in the whole damn mess (the bird certainly gives a more convincing performance than the rest of the cast).

It's quite hard to talk about a movie such as this without insulting someone or without swearing. I think that the guys at IMDb should reconsider their position about that, because if we could use certain (forbidden) words these comments would be much easier to write.

OK, here we go: a man escapes from a prison and he's pursued by a dog... hell yeah! Well Brian Yuzna is not only a dreadful director, he's also so slapdash (the lack of money is not an excuse), and he's learned nothing throughout all those years he's been in the industry. He does not have the faintest idea about cinema, he can't narrate, and he makes a mistake after another.

PS: the funniest thing about "Rottweiler" is that it was made with the money of some Spanish public institutions. So, now we not only subsidize the local rubbish but also the foreign one.

*My rate: 0/10

To call this one a dog would be way too obvious a joke, but it certainly is also an odd duck of a movie. It's set in a futuristic Spain (and filmed there as well), where a prison escapee, Dante (hunky William Miller) embarks on an increasingly weird odyssey to reconnect with the girl he left behind, all the while pursued by the title canine, an unstoppable cyborg with steel teeth. Much of the story is told in flashback, as we see the sequence of events that led to this point. One has to assume that the novel "El Perro" upon which this is based makes at least some things clearer, but it's hard to say just what the screenwriters and director Brian Yuzna are thinking, as this thing often alternates between utter cheese and incredible surrealism. It's extremely laughable; that chicken reaction shot has got to be, far and away, one of the brightest moments along the way, which speaks volumes for "Rottweiler"'s W.T.F. quality. It gets awfully repetitive, with tough guy Dante surviving one encounter with his four pawed nemesis after another, and gives Miller awfully crummy dialogue, even having him say clichéd garbage like telling the dog to fry in hell. The entire episode with the mother and daughter has to been to be believed, as the lady gets a look at Mr. Miller in the buff and forces herself on the guy. That does, though, lead one to note just how much beefcake is thrust in the viewer's face, with Miller obliged to do protracted scenes of nudity. Overall, the viewer may have a hard time wondering what to make of all this. It's not without some entertainment value, but, ultimately, it's just too hard to care about this story and the characters fail to spark much interest. The dog himself is pretty cool, though, and there's a sufficient amount of gore and nastiness to give the movie some spark. If one is going to watch it for the presence of legendary Spanish horror actor Paul Naschy, note that he's in just a few scenes, but he makes the most of his screen time, delivering a delicious performance as the villain, although he can't really save it. Prospective viewers should proceed at their own risk. Four out of 10.