Replica

Yes, the auteur who gave us "Birdemic" and "Birdemic 2" somehow came up with enough backing to make another movie, 66 minutes of hilarious ineptitude. Quite explicitly a Hitchcock homage, with a little "The Birds" and a lot of "Vertigo," it deals with cloning, genetic engineering, and the most boring young lovers ever committed to film. They're a self-obsessed computer chip salesman and the gene-splicing surgeon who replaced his kidney; given that she looks 22 and can barely get a line out without stuttering or correcting herself, and later portrays the Kim Novak-like double (like I said, "Vertigo") with no differentiation whatever, it's not a credible romance. There's also a wildly overacting villain, an investigator who can barely speak English, familiar San Francisco locations, CGI sets that look like they cost three dollars, and James Nguyen's signature, endless shots of cars pulling into driveways, cars pulling out of driveways, cars pulling onto the road. The music's almost competent; the matron playing Evelyn's mom actually acts, and the editing is seemingly from a four-year-old with a pair of scissors. The sound drifts in and out, the overdubbing is.wretched. Let me add, I watched this on Rifftrax, with even Kevin and Mike and Bill unable to contain their laughter at Nguyen's incompetence, and I had a great time.

Like exercising a Stock option at NCT software, this movie was worth the wait. More riveting than a sales pitch for serlr pnals or poorly simulated coitus in a bikini. Just when you think James Nguyen couldn't possibly top his previous works of genius, you find out you are right. Once again, the house from Birdemic steals the show with its riveting performance and super accessible driveway action. One major addition was the directors brother as the totally convincing and definitely not wearing his own clothes from home detective investigating a car accident. If you don't see this movie, you are better than me.

Words can't even BEGIN to describe what a train wreck this "movie" is! I'm pretty sure that James Nguyen either A) Never saw a good movie. B) Has a SERIOUS mental health issue or C) Lost a bet with someone,and the loser has to make a couple of HORRENDOUS movies. I thought "Birdemic" was the worst movie I have ever seen..then...good 'ol James Nguyen throws me THIS CURVEBALL?!?!?! This "movie" is (thank God) a very short watch. I just can't fathom how these "actors" got the parts for this flick??? It sure wasn't an audition...if it WAS...dear Lord,I would LOVE to see who didn't make the cut!!! The woman doctor / replica is SOOOOO BAD that it makes it actually kinda FUN to watch,and the Asian detective is probably worse than the female doctor...I was laughing SO HARD that I had to go back and see what I missed. IF you decide to watch this crapfest...one viewing should do it for you...I think seeing it once is MORE THAN enough...seriously...I think watching this "movie" more than once will lower your IQ to that IQ of a radish.

I might have given it a lower rating, but my goodness is this not an amazing movie. Watch it. Laugh at it. Enjoy yourself. I myself was making independent films during this time, so I can understand the struggles, frustrations, and hard work that is involved in creating something like this. I look back at this time with joy, and see others experiencing something similar to myself (Happy to know I'm not alone!)

While the story might seem to be all over the place, and the acting is hindered by bad audio (again something I know all too well), it's still a fun watch...even better clocking in under the 70 minute mark!

This film comes to us from the same director/writer who brought us Julie and Jack and the more well known Birdemic. Out of these three horrible films, this one ranks the worst of the trio of terror! Watch as people move about as no human being does, stammer over lines and shake profusely to indicate excitement. Listen as a bird in a cage literally chirps loudly enough to drown out the actors in the film! Be amazed by a opening credit sequence that looks like a screen saver when screen savers were first created!

The story, like most of the director's films is all over the place focusing on a salesman and a very awkward romance. He goes farther than he did with the other films, making the salesman Joe in this one literally stalk his prey and then have the horrid romance that ends in tragedy as his beloved dies in the slowest looking crash in movie history. Before the body is cold in the ground he is trying to put the moves on a new girl because she looks like his lost love and he even wants her to do her hair like the dead girl. Yeah, as I said the film has a creepy vibe.

So we get another bad film from the director who apparently never saw a real human being before because he obviously does not have the ability to direct one to act anything resembling how a real person acts. He does a good job directing real birds I guess. Joe comes across as really creepy, but the girl playing Evelyn/Claudia is cute...albeit a lousy actress!

So, if you want to watch a film where people do not act human then I suggest all three films I have mentioned. This one is the worst of the lot as it takes til nearly the end to get to the point forcing you to watch flashback scenes of absolutely mundane events that shed the light on nothing! The only thing good is seeing the lead girl in a bikini, but lets be real, you can see that and more in an adult film and quite honestly the acting is better!