Most Haunted

This is one of those shows that deserves it's own drinking game. Every time the host shrieks or cries, take a drink. Every time Derek says "Slaughter", take a drink. Every time they say that a place isn't haunted, drink a whole fifth of Everclear.

Where does one begin to unravel how stupid this show is? Yes, they go to interesting places. Yes, the UK is filled with spooky places to investigate, but it's amazing that EVERY site they travel to is chock full o' ghosts.

Yvette Fielding is about as scientifically minded as a carnival barker at the freakshow. She flips out as soon as the light are off, and every bump or cobweb is a sign that someone is trying to contact her.

Derek Accora is ridiculously cheesy, especially when he goes into trances that supposedly lead to him "channeling" an evil spirit. And his "spirit guide" Sam, Derek's imaginary friend whom he thanks profusely throughout the show always manages to give him half-correct clues that lead them to another room where Yvette will nearly pee her pants.

Be sure to take a drink whenever the disclaimer at the bottom of the screen suggests that there's no proof to back up whatever Derek says. It happens often, so you'll probably be toasted after one full episode.

I actually do believe in ghosts which is exactly why I hate television shows such as "Most Haunted" - they simply cash in on the paranormal phenomenon knowing full-well that it will grab the attention of everyday people.

I've had my own experiences in the past, and read supported stories, to convince me there is some type of supernatural force out there - but "Most Haunted" certainly isn't a study of that. It's an exploitation - and a fake one - not only of ghosts but of its viewers, too.

The lead psychic, Derek Acorah, seems to get possessed every time he walks into a room. The Mirror (UK) recently uncovered evidence proving Derek is a faker - he was supposedly "possessed" by a fake ghost character invented by a sceptical co-star to test Derek's honesty.

I think this show is just a really poor and deceiving program that shouldn't even be on the air anymore.

I first got interested in Most Haunted when it started a couple of years ago. It is an interesting idea - take a film crew, a self-proclaimed "parapsychologist" and "spiritualist medium" to some of the country's allegedly "Most Haunted" locations for a night and see what happens. This show has quite a strong following here in the UK, where it is probably the No. 1 programme on the Living TV channel which, given its programme lineup would be more accurately described as the "Psychic Telly Channel".

I have to say that I now suspect that all is not quite as it seems here folks. Presenter Yvette Fielding and husband Karl Beattie (also the "director" on this show) are behind the production company that make this programme. As I see more of these shows I've come to realise that this is purely populist entertainment chasing ratings rather than a vehicle for serious investigation of the possibility of real paranormal behaviour. Nothing wrong with that really I suppose - those ratings show that there is a market for this stuff and that is what commercial TV is all about. This is a product, and originally it was quite cleverly packaged and presented and even had a certain (limited) seriousness attached to it.

But the game is up I think. Most of the time the crew seem to be intent on scaring themselves by poking around in dark corners with all the lights deliberately turned out because "the ghost's prefer the dark". Yeah right - and it adds atmosphere for the viewer's at home doesn't it?. The crew seem to be trying to recreate a kind of "Blair Witch lite" on primetime TV". Yvette may be a likeable enough TV presenter, but she's a totally hopeless investigator of the paranormal. She (and most of the rest of the crew) seems to get completely freaked out by the smallest noise and at the first signs of any real possible activity they run in the opposite direction. What is this, a serious investigation or some kind of live action Scooby Doo? If you are seriously looking for evidence of the paranormal, you don't run away from it when you find a few hints that it may exist. "Spiritualist medium" Derek Acorah is generally unconvincing. I don't believe him and I find it hard to believe that he is not briefed in advance by the production crew before he arrives at the "haunted" locations. After all, the purpose of this show is to generate ratings and so they need their "medium" to "produce the goods" in order to make it all look convincing. Sorry if that sounds cynical people, but nothing in this program is done scientifically, no matter how may "EMF meters" get waved about. This show is not investigative - it is entertainment and that is all.

You only have to watch one of the (increasingly frequent) Most Haunted Live shows to make you suspicious that things could very well be engineered behind the scenes of this programme. These live shows are "Dumb TV" at its very worst. Painful viewer phone-ins of "weird" events at home - stopped clocks, barking dogs etc. Stage psychics doing "automatic drawings". Webcams on which online viewers report seeing things for which there is no subsequent evidence. Yvette supposedly complaining about why she has to go poking around in the dark (possible answer: for the money honey?) Sending the "sceptical scientist " Matthew out into the cold and dark as some kind of "punishment" while the audience brays... this is Trash TV.

As for their "evidence" - it also doesn't really seem to have occurred to anyone that those "orbs" (visible only on night-vision video cameras, and the only "evidence" that the crew ever find) could be due to the way that these cameras operate. Anyone ever think of trying some simple tests like putting two cameras side by side and see if you get the same result on both? No. Or put two cameras at different angles focused on the same area and see if they both pick up the same thing. No. Never happens. A few noises and air draughts in buildings that are many hundreds of years old does not constitute evidence for the paranormal no matter how much Derek, Yvette et al may try to play it up. This is showbiz folks - the 21st century, satellite TV equivalent of telling ghost stories around the camp fire. Watch with a healthy dose of scepticism and don't accept at face value everything, or indeed anything that you see here. Remember the objective of these programme makers is to sell their product at the highest possible price. These people are salesmen, not scientists.

At first we were impressed that Derek (aka "Degsie" to fans) could pull out historical facts from the ether with the help of his psychic guide Sam (an ethiopian who lived centuries ago).

We so wanted to believe!

The show Most Haunted has been a huge ratings winner for a little cable channel in UK - and the show crossed over onto our basic cable in the USA. It does nicely for Travel Channel in the USA.

After a little digging and googling - and reading about some behind-the-scenes entrapment by the crew who planted fake info to Derek before tapings -- we are now bigger fans than ever.

We know from media reports that he was slyly given anagrams of the words "Derek Lies" (Rik Eedles) and "Derek Faker" (Kreed Kafer) and he grabbed onto the names he overheard from the crew and sure enough these fake names of souls promptly came through during the taping !! Brilliant! We love this show anyway!!

Derek may give hope to millions that there is something in the next world, and sweet souls are in "visitation" among us -- but to us - "Degs" is simply a classic TV showman.

A few seasons into the series - Degs began to get possessed during seances. He would bellow and hiss as the supposed spirit persons who were hanging around old cellars, castles and manors.

In one classic show, he became possessed by the spirit of a pagan hag and barked at an interviewer when asked "her" name -- Degsie hissed: " What's YOUR name, leper ?!! " After these entertaining possessions, Derek usually collapses into a heap, is escorted out and his work is done. ("Derek, come forward!")

Derek (a former footballer turned spirit medium) supposedly arrives at these "haunted" locales "with no prior history of the building." However, many of these locations are famous "haunted" UK tourist destinations (many with "ghost tours" available to the public).

Sometimes Derek forgets a date or a surname - but he usually covers by getting distracted by another spirit and the question is never answered.

The show is hosted by a former UK child star named Yvette Fielding. Co-hosted by her campy historian colleague and part-time ghost walk tourguide Richard Felix, with "base line readings" taken early in every show by Phil Wyman (thru season 4). Phil is a husky and cute lad prone to wearing tight dance club Tshirts. I love Phil!!

Watch for: Yvette sitting in a dark empty manor and asking ever so politely "is anybody here?" --- "please make a noise if you can hear me." --- "a noise...a bump...anything".

Watch for: Derek being "drawn" to "an area" and after being prompted by Yvette if he'd like to go towards another room, he says "may we?". (Yes! we want to yell-- That's why you are there!)

Watch for: Derek to use A lot of descriptive words to reveal very little info.

The MH producers perhaps became hostile towards -or- jealous of Derek's antics & fame - and he left the show after 6 seasons to star in his own spin off series "Derek Acorah's Ghost Towns" (where he has even more over-the-top possessions, and brings celebrity to ordinary people's haunted houses. In the spin off series, attention seekers drop by the "Ghost Truck" for pre-interviews. How handy!).

Most Haunted was a cult sensation in the UK - with French & Saunders even spoofing it on their BBC comedy special.

After 7 years of investigations and a parade of psychic mediums, the show has uncovered little in terms of proof of hauntings or the paranormal- except the occasional bump in the night, TV sets that turn on & off, and those frequent "light anomalies" (which look a lot like dust floating past digital handi-cams).

Most Haunted with Derek Acorah and his predictable enthusiasm, edginess and histrionics is a terrific way to pass an evening in front of the telly --with or without "a grounded soul in visitation".

If this is a show of real investigations, they are going about it all wrong. Yvette screams way too much. My group was professional, we did not scream or run like chickens with our heads cut off.