Flyin' Ryan

This film was so bad I almost want to give it a ten from all the belly laughing I did through it with the poor acting, bad dialog and special effects I could have done in my toilet.

Here's why I watched it: A friend of mine went to Family Video, approached the counter and asked, "what's the worst movie you have?" The clerk, informing my friend he had never been asked that before, suggested this film. A great suggestion - give this employee a raise. It's as bad as "The Wild and the Free".

The story is that of a boy who moves to a new town with his mother and must face a gang of tough-talking skaters. And he gets help fro ma little girl (the only good part of the film, Geneve Ruppert) and his dead great grandfather, Theodore McGoogan McGwire.

None of the actors have been in films before or since and maybe never will. They're awful. The camera-work looks like a home video most of the time. The "flying" effect is so poor that you can't help but laugh. And the children speak very strangely, with words like "basshole" and "magic transcends logic" (which I'll never hear a 12-year old say). I take back Geneve Ruppert being the only good part. One line from a character about coffee and butt-grabbing was also funny.

Don't rent this film unless you're planning on getting drunk or are intentionally looking to waste your time. Luckily, I was one of these two things.

This is simply the most God awful garbage I have ever seen. I might deem myself an expert on Flyin Ryan, for I have seen it more than thirty times. The story is about a kid who moves to the middle of no where, for no reason, and gets picked on immediately by this chubby no good kid named Dirk (and his skateboard crew). Ryan gets chased by him, which leads to one of the best chase scenes ever created (yes, even better than Bullet) which involves moon physics, tennis balls, a karate teacher jumping over a moving motorcycle, dune-buggies, and, lets not forget most importantly, RYAN CAN FLY BECAUSE OF HIS MAGIC SHOES. Ah yes, this movie was completely funded by Heelies®, the shoe company as seen throughout the movie. But this movie, on Paper looks terribly exciting. Unfortunately, with a mere $300, and a video camera, you reading this could have made a better movie. None of the actors featured in this cinema have gone on to be in any movies since, and if they haven't committed suicide yet, they will within the next five years. This movie is the real reason why Siskel from Siskel & Ebert died.

FLYIN' RYAN is awesome. Every kid wants to fly, especially when the bullies are after him. In this movie, Ryan (a red-haired kid) moves with his mom up to a country house owned by his great aunt. The house might be haunted. At least that is what Ryan's crazy old great aunt thinks.

But haunted houses don't bother Ryan as much as the group of local skateboard bullies. The lead of the bullies, Dirk, is a tough, but funny, short kid.

Dirk has it out for the new kid and he and his buddies hassle him and push him into the lake. A local girl, Nicki (she's really cute) becomes Ryan's friend.

When Dirk steals Ryan's dog. Ryan has to fly over the lake and rescue the dog at the goldmine.

THE GOLDMINE is AWESOME.

Funny and filmed in a small town with lots of animals, Flyin' Ryan is great for kids.

Funny movie, when drunk... The acting was awful and so was the screen play. The only good part in the whole 84 minute movie was the 10 seconds of the Karate guy jumping over a random motorcycle. The movie was distasteful and was a complete disaster. I would never let my child watch this movie. This movie was a bomb. For a movie called "Flyin' Ryan" he doesn't do a whole lot of flying. There was ass grabbing..... enough said... and a creepy hermit dog.. There where so many scenes in this movie that had nothing to do with anything that the movie was supposedly about. Ducks biting each other? THe same shot of the same deer every twenty minutes? No wonder none of the actors have been in any other movies.. except for the motorcyclist.. and hes a stunt guy. Sad and depressing as it was.. it did make me laugh quite a bit. But other than that.. god this movie was pretty sad. It wasn't something that humanity should be exposed to.

Let me start by saying, that I had my doubts. I consider myself to be a film connoussier of sorts, however this move was so bad that I had to laugh. In fact, I think it is the best movie that has ever fit into the "so bad it's funny" category. From the bad acting to the ill-formed storyline, this movie tries desperately to make a lot of sense, but fails to do so in every respect. For example, the main character, Ryan, receives a pair of "Heely" shoes (the entire movie it seems, is one, overgrown add for those shoes) from his grandmother. BUT...they have not wheels, so poor Ryan still cannot fit in. That is when he somehow ends up at an isolated store (it is randomly on the shore of some lake), where a mysterious guy dressed in mid-ninteenth century dress from the American West tells him something anectdotal and then takes the wheels off of a model plane and gives them to Ryan. My two favorite scenes however, are the one where a girl randomly has two extra ATVs, and gives them to the bullies giving chase to Ryan, and the time that Ryans small dog is kidnapped by the bully and considered as a candidate for Guard Dog at the bully's cousins guard post at some random processing plant, which Ryan flies out of. If I has all the time in the world, I could not tell you how much this movie sucks, but it sucks really funny.