Capturing the Friedmans

Knowing some of the parties involved in the actual case I was curious to see the film to see how they came across on the big screen. I was however reluctant to see it since the furor over who did what or who didn't or who's lying or not was clouding my perception of the film from the get go.

I let time pass and finally sat down to watch the film once I thought things had calmed down.

As a document of a family on the path to destruction I am floored by the film. This is a heart breaking exploration of how things are not what we think they are and how character flaws can and will wipe out the ones we love.(Although I think Character flaws is the wrong term)

A great deal of the later half of the film dances around whether Jesse, the son who pleaded guilty to the charges, was really guilty. Its here I found the film to be slightly flawed because to me the film wants to have it both ways, him guilty and innocent. I think the film makers should have picked aside, since what they have done here seems less than subjective and fair (to either side)

This is a tough film. If you can't handle frank sexual talk about child molestation then stay away. However, if you want to see an excellent film about a family in crisis then see this film.

9 out of 10.

Outstanding documentary, which demonstrates how quickly life can fall apart for anyone. The center of attention, of course, is Arnold Friedman, a pedophile whose personal issues create a firestorm that destroys his own life, but more tragically, the lives of his children. There are so many facets to this documentary that it amazes me that they could all be captured in the film's running time. Several important issues are highlighted; front and center is the hysteria surrounding pedophilia that emerged in the late eighties. Amidst the background of the McMartin and "Little Rascals" trials and the culture of quack psychology (repressed memories, hypnotic suggestion) emerged the case of Arnold Friedman.

The most interesting aspect of this case was that Friedman was a pedophile - there is no doubt about that. The question is whether he was guilty of the crimes charged, more than 300 charges of child abuse. Furthermore, could his son and assistant, Jesse, also be guilty? The filmmaker does not force out any answers to that question, but the testimonies of his accusers and the incompetent buffoonery of the police involved in the case lead one to conclude that the answer is a resounding "No."

The crimes are only part of the story. The true story lies in the destruction of the Friedman family. Arnold, the eccentric intellectual and apparently loving father turns out to be feeble and a pedohpile, a man crippled by guilt. Elaine, the "loving wife and mother" who is frozen out by her family turns out to be a weaker human being than her husband, bowing under pressure to administer horrifying "advice" to her youngest son. The brothers, lead by the eldest, fight a losing battle to save their family. One of the most tragic and moving pictures I have seen in ages.

You really have to be open-minded watching this, because it deals with subject matter that's so easy for us to condemn without the will to examine. We have a man, Arnold, who is accused of child molestation after porn magazines are found in his possession. We have his son, Jesse, who is accused of being his accessory in the molestations. Jesse says that he was abused by his father at a young age and that he enjoyed the attention. Then Jesse says his lawyer made that up. A man slouched on a couch, inarticulate and seemingly placing himself in a sexual position while being interviewed for the film, gives testimony against the Friedmans that led to 35 criminal counts. Jesse claims he is innocent. Someone is lying.

This is rich, complex stuff, and the filmmaker doesn't put his own views into the film. He doesn't question the interviewees outright -- although he does "catch" one guy, and contrast different remembrances, some of which indict the Friedmans, others that wave away all accusations. The story gets told to us largely through Arnold's home videos, and so we're witness to the family's self-destruction. This is Shakespeare, and there's a shattering moment when Arnold's wife, Elaine, asks, "Where did this come from?"

The film is craftily put-together -- there's a shock left until the end, the kind of thing that calls into question what we've just seen -- and the filmmaker looks at the situation as a family drama, with the backdrop of the trial, where understandably furious parents try and attack Arnold ("You raped my son!"). But the film also has this sense of sleaze -- or, at least, the sense of something iffy: the sex is inherently "dirty" -- Arnold bought gay-related magazines, and the film has mentions of incest. There's a kind of public hysteria that exists, where people throw their hands up into the air when anything deviating from the sexual norm is mentioned, and refuse to even listen to an argument that suggests there might not actually be anything wrong. But I think it's important to stand back and analyze the situation before we make our decision about Arnold. He does, in fact, eventually admit to abusing one child, a son of a friend, so he is a molester; whether or not he abused the children that he taught and that is the subject of the documentary is another matter; my own feeling is that the evidence is pretty sketchy, and that he was made an example out of for possessing magazines. (And he does openly admit to having experimented sexually with his brother -- whose admission at the end of the film is revelatory -- and his lawyer says that Arnold expressed arousal at one young boy bouncing on his father's lap when the lawyer visited Arnold in jail.) It's my belief that there's nothing wrong with Arnold's pedophiliac desire and owning of child pornography. (Although obviously the purchasing of pornography fuels the industry which in turn exploits and abuses more children, but I'm talking specifically about his mental state.) If he didn't act on his desires, then he does not deserve to have his life and his family's life torn to shreds.

As the film goes on, it becomes clear that Arnold, this somewhat meek, nebbish figure, probably isn't the monster he's made out to be. One student made claims against him, we learn, to "get them off my back," meaning the investigators. That claim led to 16 criminal counts. Some of the charges against Arnold sound horrific, but are pretty unbelievable, like the idea he lined the children up naked in a leap frog position, and then proceeded to penetrate them one by one. (The simple mechanics of male-male intercourse don't make it that easy.) The police claimed that Arnold had stacks upon stacks of child (or, really, adolescent teen) pornography; yet his wife never managed to see them, and the photos of the house taken during the investigation show nothing. These are the reasons that prove Arnold's innocence, not the comments made, like the one by Jesse's friend, who says that he couldn't be a violent molester because he was so quiet in everyday life. (We all know how wrong-headed that idea is.) This is a terrific documentary; the investigation and the children's memories all swirling together, but what makes it so crushing is how it affects the family. The looks and the words and the shadows of doubt they cast on one another is far worse than any jail sentence. 9/10

I do not dispute the director's craft. This film is enthralling and engaging, and he keeps it interesting albeit frustrating to the end.

What I do dispute is the director's lack of opinion and apparent siding with this family.

If Arnold and Jesse didn't do anything inappropriate, I can imagine they would be flabbergasted with such charges and be wondering to themselves the entire film "where is this coming from? I'm absolutely perplexed". But they're not. The entire film Jesse and David are constantly WHINING and incredibly defensive, constantly saying "nothing happened." When, things DID happen.

• the police found stacks of child porn in Arnold's office. Fact
• Arnold admitted to abusing Jesse. Fact.

• Jesse admitted to his lawyer (who's more credible than he is) that his father abused him and he abused (and was willing to admit to abusing) computer students. Fact.

• there was a computer game with naked men and women used by Arnold to test the boys willingness to engage.

Arnold, David, and Jesse make themselves out to be these spoiled, whining, brats throughout the film. There's no remorse for anything. There's no empathy for any of the victims, including themselves. There's nothing but absolute denial when the evidence is clear as day.

To me, the BIGGEST VICTIM OF THEIR CRIMES IS THEIR MOTHER. The abuse I saw her endure during this film is absolutely atrocious. I'm glad she found someone decent to live out the rest of her days, because her sons and husband treated her like GARBAGE. It was infuriating the watch. They deserved what they got simply for their treatment of her. It was despicable.

What is perplexing is the wide range of testimony from the computer students, with some saying they were molested several times and some saying they never saw or heard a thing. One picture shows the students having fun in the class. This is the biggest question I have - why do some remember and some don't? I do think it's possible the police may have interrogated inappropriately, even to the point of using hypnosis and planting false memories. If this was true, it would be a massive injustice and proof the police were part of the hysteria.

But to me I have biggest issue with Jarecki and how silent he is on the direction of the film. This is a subject that should infuriate you but he treats it so lightly, allowing footage of the sons berating their mother for having any emotion and making us listen to the sons WHINE CONSTANTLY without offering any evidence of Jesse or their father's innocence. All they did was deny. Everyone deserves a fair shake but to me this entire family was in complete denial and clearly couldn't deal with this situation. I don't blame them, honestly. So why doesn't Jarecki call them out?

Wow! This movie was nothing short of absolutely fascinating!!!!!! It really leaves you with more questions than answers. Just when you think you've got a little shred of truth, your theory gets blown out of the water.

I watched this movie alone, and I've been wanting to dissect it with somebody ever since. To me, the most sympathetic people in the movie were Jesse and the Mother. Yes, the mother was weak and she dealt with a lot of the issues by not dealing with them, but she was at least honest, and honesty was a very rare commodity in this family.

Also,I really tended to believe Jesse. I don't think that his father molested him, but I think that the father might have molested David (the clown). David was sooooo deep and heavy into denial - he completely villainized his mother and held his father accountable for as little as possible.

This movie leaves A lot of fertile ground for amateur psychologists...It is probably the most fascinating "case study" of a dysfunctional family that has ever been documented.

It kind of makes me wonder how must families would end up looking under such close scrutiny....