Meat Market

Y'know what really gets my panties in a bunch? When a bad movie comes out, and then the people behind it go around to all the movie websites and pose as fans, leaving tons of "Oh wow, it was wonderful!" messages all over the place. I'm the victim of this sort of crap. I read reviews of Meat Market in a couple of places, and they were drooling with approval and gushing with praise. I encourage you to take a closer look at the other people posting here on IMDB about this and other Sub-Rosa movies. Notice anything familiar upon closer inspection? Yup, you got it. If the movie's any good, why do you think they need to trick people into buying it? Meat Market is a travesty. I bought this puppy because I'm a long-time Zombie film fan, and had heard that MM was supposed to rival Dawn of the Dead in its own way, even though the budget was low and it was technically a B-movie. No biggie, thought I, cuz I love b-movies, too. Eagerly I grab my new purchase and race for home and my trusty DVD player, a fellow movie buff in tow for the shared experience!

Right away I can tell something's wrong. The acting wasn't just bad, it was can't-watch-the-movie-because-the-horrible-acting-is-upstaging-everything-el se kindof bad. Truly horrible. Then I begin to realize that the writing was also at fault. The dialogue was just plain stupid. People simply don't talk that way; another distraction from the "story." I glance over at my friend (we're only a short way in at this point), and he's looking back at me like I just shoved an anthrax-coated toothpick in his eye. Back to the movie... Supposedly, the dead are walking the streets, and people are running for their lives, shooting at the fake zombies if they're lucky enough to have guns. Apparently the zombies only congregate where there are cameras, because the background is still filled with moving cars, and other "normal" aspects of life. Sheesh. Corpses that are "killed" miraculously appear again in other scenes, as do a couple of victims that I was pretty sure had gotten killed a little while ago. The police act like Keystone Kops, the make-up and special effects are just plain horrible. Wanna look like a zombie? Rub some blackout under your eyes and wrinkle your clothing. Viola! Tom Savini would be embarrased. The plot continues to get more bizarre and make absolutely no sense, and while you're still mentally trying to get this atrocity to make sense, you're hit with more strangeness from left field, such as vampires that suddenly appear in skimpy, ridiculous outfits and continually pose for the camera wherever it's at while spewing forth the worst dialogue in stunted, I've-never-acted-before-in-my-life speech.

I can see how this may have looked good on paper as an initial idea. Zombies and vampires, world falling apart, gun-toting survivors, etc. Yeah, sign me up, sounds great. Unfortunately, both the script and the execution of the idea (makeup, effects, acting, dialogue, etc.) are so bad the movie literally isn't watchable. My friend got up halfway through the film, gave me a dirty look like I'd just played the worst dirty trick on him ever, and walked out. I gave it another five minutes and gave up, too. Dirty trick indeed. On us. Do yourself a favor, don't even rent this. Even Mike, Tom Servo, & Crow couldn't sit through this one. You've been warned.

I bought this film without know or having heard anything about it. I was determined to buy SOMETHING that night, and this was the only interesting thing, so i bought it. There are some really great aspects to this film, as well as some really horrible things. It's films like this one that enforce my belief that horror fans should NOT make their own horror movies. And by that, i mean it becomes inevitable that you are gonna try and pay homage to your faves, and throw in your own little inside jokes, and just all around try and be clever when you are, well, not. Also, i know its difficult to pull a budget together, and sometimes we just want to put something of ourselves out there so badly that we are willing to make a lot of compromises. And maybe it's just time for me to expand my mind on this subject, but for now, I CANNOT STAND WATCHING MATERIAL SHOT ON VIDEO!!! There should be some kind of warning on the box or case letting you know how a film is presented. Its just difficult to take a film seriously when it looks like you got a couple of friends together and borrowed you Dads Cam-corder to make a spooky movie. All that said and out of the way, i will say that this film is pretty good. I can honestly say that the filmmaker himself is going to be a fine director someday. The zombie make-up is VERY good. Better than a lot of movies that HAVE found financial backing. The writing is ...o.k... i think it might have come off a little better if a little more detail was paid to the acting (again, the same scenes could be shot on film as opposed to video and might have worked. It's the fault of the medium). One of my favorite pieces of the film is the storyline of Vampire vs. Zombie. I have always wanted to see this conflict in some form. Both undead, but in different ways. The film makes some interesting choices with that storyline, and id like to have seen more conflict there. Another good thing about this film is that it ALMOST never reverts to making fun of the genre or digresses into sophomoric jokes. For the most part, this movie does take itself very seriously, which gives it more integrity. I do recommend this film for zombie lovers, if for nothing else, to glimpse the early work of someone who will most definatly blossom into a great horror director.

Great, another low-budget zombie movie attempt that adds absolutely nothing new. On top of that, it's a really poorly done film, with bad effects, a non-existent story and some real bad directing and acting throughout.

The foremost problem of this movie is that it's thinking too highly of itself. It obviously very blatantly tries to be like another "Dawn of the Dead", with as a big difference that none of the persons involved with this movie were very talented ones. It tries to do too much with it's gore and action, while the movie clearly didn't had the budget for it. The gore isn't very convincing, just like it's make-up effects and seem to be only put in the movie for that sake of having some gore in it. Same goes for all of the nudity and sex scenes. They are so terribly pointless and random. The movie should had been way more creative and should had tried less to impersonate other successful genre movies from the past.

It's a real poorly put together film, that doesn't even really follow a good clear main story. It makes the movie all the more pointless to watch. What makes it all the more worse is the fact that the movie is totally lacking in some good or likable enough characters. This movie could had uses a main hero but instead now we got some flat characters, you don't even remember the names off. There are also far too many characters in it. Seriously, this movie should have had only 3 or 4 main characters at most in it, to keep things at least somewhat more engaging and easy and more pleasant to follow.

It's a straight to video movie that also got shot on video, which just isn't the best or most professional look for a movie. It makes it look all extremely amateur like, which in essence is of course right, since this movie got made by non-professionals, without a decent budget backing them up. But saying that this movie is bad simply because it didn't had a decent budget behind it really wouldn't be a fair assumption. The movie is bad in many ways, that aren't necessarily budget related. The pace and setup is really poor, as is its editing, writing and acting. All things that just simply indicate that none of the persons involved with this movie are among the most talented ones around, which is still the foremost reason why this movie simply fails to deliver.

As far as low-budget horror goes; this is isn't the worst attempt I have ever seen and I didn't hated it watching as much as lots of other modern horror attempts but this still remains a movie that you should simply skip, even if you're a lover of zombie flicks.

3/10

http://bobafett1138.blogspot.com/

this flick is rather popular with the horehounds and I agree, it do has a lot of gore. But gore doesn't make a movie. And that's what this flick doesn't actually has. It's an extreme low budget flick but still it's worth picking up.

It shows that all the money went to the effects used. Not to make the zombies who look rather good for a low budget but for the effects used. From the start you will see zombies being shot or people being bitten by the horde. The only thing people dislike this flick is the acting itself. The acting is amateuristic and laughable when they are having conversations. Just watch when the 3 vampires are having a talk with the survivors. Another thing that some have problem with is the nudity here and there. The opening of Meat Market shows a couple who are making it out. There's no nudity and we only see the girl in her underwear but the guy shows his hard-on even as it is clear that it was a fake penis, towards the end of this flick I guess we have the real thing when a vampire is making love. The stupidity lays in the fact that they are making love while soldiers are clearing the building. Of course a zombie is shot and all his blood sputters all over the couple. But there's more real nudity here and there.

It's really the blah blah that will make you go for the zapper to turn it off. If it wasn't for the gore I would too. It spawned two other Meat Market flicks and has a following. You've been warned, really bad acting but, sigh, the gore makes it watchable...and the scene's with the luchador.

Gore 2/5 Nudity 2/5 effects 2/5 Story 1,5/5 Comedy 0/5

Where do you start with something this terrible? Shooting on video is always a good sign of the badness to follow. Why do these 'home movie' enthusiasts never, ever get real actors? Most struggling actors will work for free and they will do a much better job than the producer's buddy. The only entertainment in this is just how bad the sound and editing are. The sounds of 'eating' were added whenever a zombie attacked, but it sounded like they had swallowed the mic. My favorite sound was the audible friction created by the plastic pants on the thunder-thighed lesbo vampires...embarrassing all around. And why wouldn't you (I guess I'm talking to the makers of this) at least read a book on how to write screenplays because there was no discernible story or ending! And, finally, for god's sake spend the money on film school…if you went then go again and pay attention this time!