Searching for Haizmann

The problem with this movie is that it should have been photographed more poorly. I actually can't remember ever thinking that until watching SEARCHING FOR HAIZMANN. It's a problem because this is yet another BLAIR WITCH PROJECT knock off, coming long after the cycle seemed to be mercifully over.

As soon as BLAIR WITCH started making money it divided people sharply into the "one of the greats" and "not even a film" camps of opinion. Regardless of if you thought it was a fake display of bad acting and shaky camera work I think you would still agree that virtually all of the rip offs and attempted parodies of BLAIR WITCH prove that the original does contain enough unrepeatable lighting in a bottle moments that it should be left alone. Well a good case has been made by the makers of the, starts-off-well-but-ends -badly, THE LAST BROADCAST to prove that it inspired THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT which in a way makes BLAIR the best of the knock offs of the basic relatively new mockumentary genre.

This time the real, or claimed to be real, subject matter involves a lost soul-eternal-man-antichrist named Haizmann who three kids who are internet pals decide to go after while at the same time hoping for some romance along the way. A documentary crew decides to go along for the ride. Are you convinced by any of this set up yet?

Now searching for the Antichrist hasn't previously proved to be a fertile ground for movie characters to use to find true love, or at least a roll in the hay, and it's a pretty bogus reason on the surface, but then again much of the downtime in Robert Wise's near masterpiece THE HAUNTING is filled by the characters trying to drink and joke their way into proving life after death so perhaps SEARCHING FOR HAIZMANN still might have a chance. Actually it's kind of a reversal of the crappy horror movie set up where kids go out to have a roll in the hay and decide to "have a seance" or "raise the devil" or "go into the haunted house/ funhouse/woods/etc..." as part of their evenings fun. The lesson here I guess is that going out to party and have sex really should be enough fun for everyone, and isn't that a message we can all get behind?

SEARCHING FOR HAIZMANN starts off with some dreadful fake actors pretending to not be actors talking to the camera that immediately let you know you're in trouble. After that things occasionally get better before they ultimately get worse. Along the way it tries to recreate, sometimes more than once, it's own version of BLAIR WITCHES instantly trademark moments, like the panicked run through the woods and the tilted angle final shot. The acting here can't be just said to be bad as much as it's confused since you have actors trying to act like they aren't acting. To try to alleviate this endemic problem one character is actually supposed to be an actor in "reel" life.

So I'm back to my "it should have been shot more poorly overall problem." It all looks the same. Doesn't matter if it's supposed to be "real" footage of things happening, or videotaped "interviews" it all looks artificially lit and theatrical albeit in a low low budget fashion. The rather good music and spooky 5.1 sound job further reminds you always that you are watching a movie not a documentary. One of the unsung virtues of THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT was it's excellent use of sound but it never made you think you were watching a movie as the sound effects do here. Of course nothing wrong with fiction films that are just fiction, but HAIZMANN'S story structure has to have some of it be "real" to hold your interest and it never is.

The film's opening credit sequence features a colorful if video looking series of overlapping images and computery- looking graphics that are supposed to be old texts from ancient books. Later in the film some of these same title graphics are layered over top of events occurring in the film which only further reminds you you are watching a movie during what should be shocking moments. Actually it reminds you of the opening credits which make you wonder just when all this tediousity might end.

Another problem is that the scope of this story is too large for the filmmakers to pull off. BLAIR WITCH was set is largely in a too bland looking forest, here the story spans both time and the globe, yet all we see are the interiors of various crew member's apartments.

Despite a case of budget impoverishment they did manage to get performances from a number of name (or former name) actors. Their presence is distracting but Clint Howard and especially Tippi Hedren come off well. Stephen (ANIMAL HOUSE, THE UNSEEN) Furst seems to loose weight as he gets older and is doing a rather good Woody Allen impersonation here in his small part that of course totally takes you out of any mood of being scared. The three "kids" who are the leads are pretty bad, though Jenny Mollen as Grace Robin does manage to have a few good hysterical moments.

Production values though suffer, especially in the prop department, there are some pretty fake looking headless chickens in one scene and some really bad paintings supposedly done by the demonic Haizmann over the course of many years that look like they were done by a fifth grader five minutes before they were plopped down in front of the camera. Now maybe those were real chickens and maybe the actual paintings did look like that. So what? They both look bad and fake here. I've never heard of Haizmann and though the filmmakers claim in a short extra that he's real that of course proves nothing in the context of a mockumentary like this.

The DVD presentation, I watched, is decent by the low standards of Brentwood Entertainment that is. Some artifacting comes and goes but the 5.1 sound is nice and there is a short extra, curiously called a commentary, that is actually an interview with the directors.

Too busy trying to be real in parts to take off as real suspense or horror, too artificial to be convincing as a documentary SEARCHING FOR HAIZMANN ends up as being not much of either.

'Searching for Haizmann' is a creepy ride. The characters find themselves getting deeper and deeper into the dangerous world of Satanic worship and you sure have to share their fear. It's not a 'jump-out-of-your-seat' thriller, but more an insidious mind infection of 'what if' that keeps you checking you own front door to make sure it's locked. It's truly the first film that gave me nightmares in about 10 years.

The great part is the film also has a sense of humor, and like many of the great horror films it doesn't take itself too seriously. Take for example Stephen Furst-- Flounder from 'Animal House'-- in the role of a college professor obsessed- and I mean obsessed-- with the occult. Or an innocent enough looking kid's Ice Cream Truck vendor by day who, when he trades his white hat and white Bermuda shorts for his black cloak evening wear, reveals himself as sinister minister of the occult. You'll also see cameos by the great Tippi Hedren as a psychologist examining the occult and Clint Howard who plays an intense gallery owner who at once creeps you out and makes you laugh.

Now, this is obviously a film made on a low budget and some of the production values can suffer a bit. But the nice part about an independent like this is the plot doesn't have to follow some kind of dumb Hollywood agenda. And with that the plot turns in ways you will never guess.

The film follows Julian a self-taught teenage documentary filmmaker on his quest to know if the devil is living among us in human form. He's seeking Haizmann, the 16th century painter who supposedly sold his sole to the devil for eternal life on Earth.

As luck would have it, Julian gathers together a couple of gorgeous babes who share his interest in the occult to accompany him as they set out to interview Satanic scholars and worshipers and attend a devil-worship ceremony. It would almost be a stretch that this film geek gets a couple of hotties to get on board his project, but think M-TV's 'Real World' and you'll remember the kids love to get in front of the camera. And this film obviously takes a page from reality TV with the characters sometimes sharing revealing 'confessionals' directly to the camera which in some of the film's 'documentary' footage.

All in all, the film is spot on and the story and twists are intriguing as Hell, if you'll pardon the pun.

This is probably the worst movie I've seen in a while.. Think of the "Blair Witch Project", only cheesier and dumber.. Add some pseudo-documentary inserts and the corniest ending ever, et voila - you've got searching for Haizmann. The "actors" can't act for two cents of worth, making this work seem like a cheap student movie shot for 500$. This is farther accentuated by lack of professional lighting (such as shadows without any associated natural light sources), as well as numerous synch problems (one second a girl is topless, then the camera shifts the angle, and suddenly she's fully clothed.. Alternatively, the protagonists' "on the fly" clothing changes was annoying as well). It's really a shame that this movie undermines such an interesting subject with such a poor execution. Avoid. 1/10

Searching for Haizmann is a well executed, well crafted horror film that utilizes one of the best means of conveying a story-the mystery. Events and characters unfold as our protagonists search for the truth, and ultimately before the truth finds them. The director takes this convention a step further, allowing his narrative to unspool thru interviews and pre-recorded segments. While this may seem like a gimmick similar to the Blair Witch Project and Cannibal Holocaust, the cinema vertie style lends itself nicely to the overall style and adds to enhance the atmosphere of dread. A nicely ambiguous ending further adds to the surrealistic environment and proves to be an interesting twist.

Don't be fooled by some recognizable names here! nope, this is zero grade garbage with nothing of any interest going on at all. you can't even laugh or gawk at the "stars" slumming here (is money that tight for them? or are favors owed for some unimaginable reason?). my gawd, this was a waste of time.