Route vers l'enfer

Normally I am forgiving of most low-budget "young folks in danger" types of low-grade horror films because they sometimes rise above expectations, the shot-on-video HIGHWAY TO HELL being a good example. But this one is a mess of missed opportunities. Same premise as HILLS HAVE EYES, but a group of teenager/early 20s rather than a family. That in itself is a missed opportunity (but not a big one) because we all know where horror films go when there's a gang of gregarious kids around. There's a stupid and unnecessary prologue where we see 2 girls get killed that pretty much gives away the whole story in 3 minutes. If these kids were any goofier, they'd be in a cartoon instead. There's no build of suspense, the frights are few, the cannibals look like friends and family of the film-makers with very little make-up or reason to be the way they are. And there's too many of them anyway. The cannibal hide-out is a cave and then it's an old building, then a cave again. There's no good sense of where anything is here. The leader of the cannibals, while plenty big enough, has the most ludicrous facial appearance and isn't at all scary, his mate is just a screaming mimi. With a decent effort on makeup and a bit of style and maturity this could have been pretty good, but save your time and watch HILLS HAVE EYES instead. Heck, even HILLS HAVE EYES 2 is grade A compared to this.

Cannibal Family, aged 6-60, seek bunch of annoying morons to meet in desert locale. Morons must be extremely smug, GSOH. Must be able to endear themselves to audience by doing impressions of deaf people. Applicants must be familiar with the plot of The Hills Have Eyes, but not the good parts. Note to applicants, mobile phone coverage limited, industry standard. Cannibals enjoy dining out al fresco, dancing and bad acting. Very little to offer by way of gore, cannibals will more than make up for it by way of annoying clichés and pulled punches. Cannibals enjoy little back story, romance and maybe more. Hotpants preferable. Serious applicants only.

N.B Applicants will suffer great tedium and perhaps career death.

DETOUR is not only an extremely poor clone of THE HILLS HAVE EYES. It also contains one of the most annoying, idiotic characters to be found in any horror movie.

Ever!

You'll know who it is as soon as he opens his mouth and utters his fabricated "urban slang". Basically, he's a hillbilly type with delusions of being a gangster. He's pitiful and as painfully irritating as a bad case of Shingles!

As for the movie itself, it's about more young, beautiful stickwomen and male models in danger. They're threatened by some very nonthreatening, desert-dwelling "cannibals" that look more like tourists who might have wandered onto the set by accident.

There is no suspense, terror, or originality to be found here...

Okay, yes, obviously this is a rip-off of "The Hills Have Eyes." Let's accept it and move on. Most movies these days are ripping off something else, and if the studios can get away with it, so can the indies. But this flick transcends the stigma of "low-budget-straight-to-video-horror-rip-off" for the simple reason that it is incredibly entertaining! Simply put, this is a fun movie to watch. It takes the hackneyed set-up of a bunch of kids taking a shortcut into cannibal mutant territory and delivers it in a fast, interesting, and completely watchable way. Besides the tacked-on opening, I have no gripes with this movie. The cast, the script, the direction, and even the cinematography are all above par, especially given all of our pre-conceived notions about this genre. From start to finish, it's a fun ride (and the Loopz character is a special treat). Plus, the DVD has some good bonus features (the commentary is great). Seriously, if you're a horror fan (especially of 80's slashers, which we all love to love I guess), you're not gonna go wrong with this one. Joe Bob would say check it out.

This update of the classical Craven's movie The Hills have eyes emerges from the mass of the direct to video slasher road movies of the last few years for a very good use of colors in its cinematography. This is the only redeeming feature for a movie with a young cast that could be used with more reasons in a Playboy soft core movie (and one of the actress has indeed been in a Palyboy video), it is totally boring as a real horror movie, with ridiculous special effects (with running blood that is really colored water), almost no new ideas in the use of the killers or in the killings their-selves and an hysterical cast. Anyway, it could be enjoyed by the fans of the genre because the production values are really very high for such a blame.