Mortelle Saint Valentin

The picture begins in the 1980s at a High school party, a young geeky named Jeremy Malton is insulted and humiliated by young girls and boys.Years later the same girls(Katherine Heigl,Marley Shelton,Denise Richards,Jessica Caufield,Jessica Capshaw),nowadays grown-up and beauties are threatened by someone who send them a rare Valentine's day cards.After one of the girls is brutally murdered in the anatomy lab by someone wearing a cherub mask.Later are killed one at time,always appearing the masked psycho-killer.Then ,the Police inform them which Jeremy has not been seen from many years ago,and are suspects all their boyfriends(David Boreanaz: Bones, among other).

This slasher packs suspense,terror,gory killing and beautiful girls.The chief excitement lies in seeing what new and spectacular death can be executed by the cruel murderer that seems to dispatch some new victim every few minutes of runtime.The picture gets restless horror,shocks,tension and takes accent as the suspense as well as the terror when the gory murders happen.In the wake from ¨Prom night,Scream and I still knows what you did last summer¨,the movie take parts here and there of these movies.It's all frightening entertaining ,if predictable but we have seen the previous films,but also its predictability is redeemed in part by the wonderful protagonists.The film displays a colorful cinematography by Rick Bota and adequate music score by Don Davis(Matrix and sequels,Jurassik Park III).The motion picture is professionally directed by Jamie Blanks,he's composer and director and made a similar film titled ¨Urban legend¨.The movie will like to psycho-killer genre enthusiastic but gets some decent scares and a twisted ending. Rating : Average but entertaining.

Scenario: Studio big wig to hack producer--"We need a horror film for Valentines day--give me a storyboard(sketch) by the end of the week!". Next Week: Hack producer shows scene of guy in cupid mask shooting preppy chicks with arrows, nothing else--what else can you do for Valentines day? Studio big wig: "We cant keep up a film for an hour and a half with that crap--steal stuff from every hackneyed horror film you can think of--especially 'Scary Movie'".

Next week hack producer produces about 20 minutes of cool death scenes with some half baked originality.

Studio big wig: "I like it! now get me a cheap ghost writer to fill in the other hour and I think I can get Denise Richards!"

That's pretty much it, throw in a few relatives of some semi-famous actors looking for a break and you have "Valentine".

A bunch of good looking slasher scenes looking for a plot.

I hope Denise makes it big before her looks go!

Valentine has a great premise. It takes all that Halloween stood for and tries to update it. It fails of course, but you have to give it full marks for trying. Where as a lot of films try to be original and fail at that as well, at least you can say that there is a masked killer in this film, he is incredibly strong, he walks and still catches his victims as they run and he finds original and quite disgusting ways of disposing of his victims. So I give the film credit for trying. But like most other films that have tried to follow in Screams footsteps, it does fail quite miserably.

Valentine is a story about a geeky kid that just wants to be accepted in the sixth grade. He is at a dance and asks all the pretty girls to dance and they all say no. Some of them are disgustingly mean to him and tell him that they would rather be boiled alive than to dance with him ( guess how that character dies? ). Then one heavy set girl decides she will make out with him and then when all the popular guys catch her doing it, she says that he forced himself on her and they beat the tar out of him and he is sent to reform school. That is the beginning and it is well done. It sets up the killer on the loose with a revenge plot quite nicely. We of course skip ahead about 15 years and we have beautiful women in college lined up to be slaughtered. The opening death is extremely laughable but has its moments of nice touches and subtle homages to films like Halloween. It is worth mentioning how the first woman is killed because it is a lesson in horror mythology of all the wrong things to do to attract a killer on the loose on a college campus.

A young woman just comes back from a disasterous date and decides that she is going to go do an autopsy at 11 o clock at night. Then to top it off, she is wearing a flimsy tank top, has large breasts and she decides to keep the lights off in the autopsy room, because, well you know, you don't need light to disect a human being. I started to ask myself why she was allowed to disect a corpse with no supervision this late and with no lights on seeing as she was only a med student. Horror movies are always filled with silly situations ( Friday the 13th's, no one wipes after they are finished in the bathroom, people always go to investigate noises and so on ) but this is one of the sillier ones. Then when she is grabbed by the corpse, instead of leaving, she stays in the room to see who it is. And then when the things chases her, she doesn't go for the door, she tries to hide in the other rooms. DUMB! DUMB! DUMB!

Figuring out who the killer is is fun, I must admit and they do a good job of concealing his identity until the end so you have to give it credit for that as well. But this is not really a scary film and it is not even a well done film. It had it's moments but when it leaves the theater, no one will really remember anything about it. Nothing really jumps out at you. I think Jamie Blanks has an idea of what it takes to scare an audience, he has probably tried to emulate many of the greats like Raimi, Hitchcock and Carpenter, but he can't quite seem to hit the perfect note. Maybe if he keeps trying he will get it because there are scenes in here that are close to perfection but then they end too abruptly or without the proper pay off. That is what made Halloween so elusive in it's brilliance. The pay off was so horrific and so perfect that to try to duplicate it is almost unfathomable. Valentine comes close but ultimately fails.

This is not as bad as some horror out there but it is not in the same league as some of the new horror films that have made audiences embrace horror again. Sixth Sense, Blair Witch, Stir Of Echoes, The Gift are all pretty good films. Valentine is on the brink.

6 out of 10

Ok. I'll say it right now - I'm NOT a fan of 1990's horror. Scream, I Know What You Did, etc... they can do without me. I'm a fan of 80's slashers, though - and the Italian horror films of Fulci and Argento.

While Valentine does share much with it's 1990's brothren (hot young cast, pulsating soundtrack), it also has much to share with 80's slasher flicks, and the films of Argento (please, fans of the maestro do not crucify me yet).

First an explanation of the 80's comparison, it should be a fairly obvious comparison. A young boy is tormented and rejected by his schoolmates, and comes back later to seek revenge. If that wasn't typical enough of the 80's, he also dispatches of victims in a way that reminds me of Prom Night. It's a very nice - you know who it is, but you don't - type of feel. As for comparing Valentine with Dario Argento's films - just look at the style of the killer, and then view "Tenebre." The black gloves, the relentless stalking, and even the death scenes (at times) could be seen as "style over substance."

All in all, Valentine is a fun, but sometimes slow moving, horror flick that is just a cut above the average horror films of late. It might not be such a big improvement, but it's definitely an effort.

A loose adaptation of a novel by Tom Savage, the 21st century, post-"Scream" slasher "Valentine" offers adequate entertainment, but not much more. It doesn't offer much that is fresh or interesting. Of course, it may still appeal to die hard lovers of this time-honored formula, especially the way that it concentrates on a very attractive, largely female cast. A bunch of friends start to get threatened and then killed by a mystery murderer who wears a creepy cherub mask. It just MIGHT be that geek whom the girls spurned back in junior high, but they can't know for sure.

Amusingly, many of the male characters are portrayed as being smarmy, self-serving jerks. Even nice guy Adam (David Boreanaz) has a character flaw; he's a sportswriter with a weakness for the bottle. It is because this particular slasher is so female-centric that it works to any degree. Some horror fans may appreciate the fact that director Jamie Blanks ("Urban Legend", "Storm Warning") downplays gore (for the most part, there are still some violent moments) in favor of straight suspense. All in all, the film is slick, and watchable, but hardly inspired, going through its paces with some competency but no nuance.

The cast doesn't rise above their material, but the gorgeous ladies (Denise Richards, Jessica Cauffiel, Katherine Heigl, etc.) and the hunky Boreanaz are entertaining enough to watch. Marley Shelton is the main focus as Kate, herself a journalist who is trying to learn to trust Adam (Boreanaz) again. In an amusing twist, even the requisite detective on the case (Fulvio Cecere) turns out to be a lech.

There is a prominent plot point involving nosebleeds that had some veteran horror fans recalling the 1982 thriller "Alone in the Dark", which did the same thing more memorably. The story plays out in a way familiar to any "Friday the 13th" series fan, where you have a final girl discovering various dead bodies during the final act.

You could certainly do better than this, but you could also definitely do worse.

Six out of 10.