Alien Arsenal

Please, somebody, tell me why I sit through movies like this -- multiple times, no less! I can't get enough of the wooden portrayals of stereotypical characters. I usually have no problem suspending belief when watching these movies, but were we really supposed to believe that "Ralph" and "Baxter" weren't actually just good looking kids badly in need of a makeover? Come on. And the "aliens?" They were all pale, blonde, and muscular... are they from the planet Minnesota? This movie is such a freaky scene, mostly because of the intense sincerity put into the filmmaking. The copy I rented had a "making of" feature at the end and then a promotional announcement for other Full Moon Pictures films. The most incredible thing is that all the Full Moon Films look exactly like Alien Arsenal. Is that a good thing? A bad thing? You be the judge.

It's premise is similar to Laserblast (1978), with nerd friends being bullied, who stumble onto the arsenal. Ralph and Baxter made a great wisecracking team. Don't take it too seriously, just enjoy it for what it is.

A typical teen powertrip fantasy where nerdy highschooler and his tomboy friend stumble upon alien weaponry in the school basement. They go about dispensing temperate justice for wrongs committed by the school jocks and preppies. Meanwhile, aliens, disguised as students, try to reclaim the armor and zapguns. In order to approximate cutting-edge filmmaking, the camera slowly rocks from side to side. I'm surprised i didn't vomit from seasickness! Standard stuff from Full Moon pictures. Danielle Hoover as Baxter the tomboy is about the only character with her head on straight and is the only shining light in this tepid little tale.

Strong performances by Josh Hammond. Good story line about good overcoming evil. Nice "cameo" by Ryan Van Steenis from the Killer Eye, turning in another strong performance. The movie is a good one for the kids

Teen comedy. I watched the first half hour; then it got bad. Even beautiful Danielle Hoover couldn't keep me interested. I fast-forwarded to the end, which isn't worth talking about.