The King's Guard

Oh dear. What an unmitigated disaster. The script was rambling, the cast was bored, and the direction ... well, I can't say I noticed any. How two actors such as Eric Roberts and the tremendously talented Ron Perlman were cajoled into doing this tosh is beyond me. It's a shame the video cover depicted horses and the budget obviously didn't stretch to affording them - not an equine in the whole film.

Although I must say the costumes were delightful.

Oh, and the out-takes were a revelation.

Just fast-forward and watch the bloopers. Don't bother with the rest...

How on earth did they get Ron Perlman and Eric Roberts to do this tripe of a film? Just awful!! I love these types of films in general and I love some films that are rated very low but this film I can see why it has a very low rating - it's terrible.

I don't think any of the actors were "into this" - not really. The actors are half-hearted with their acting. Now the costumes and sets are gorgeous but the story and halfway acting does not do it for me.

I skimmed through the film and it did not pick up. I'll have to try another film... I'm sorry but I can't do this one.

2/10

It started off great!! The odd hazy soft focus required some getting used to, but I was eager to see a fun film. But it got dumber, and then it got dumber. Some of the reviewers didn't like the swordplay. Well... it was kind of lazy. No real sense of aggressiveness or anger to it. The acting was bad. There were some attempts at humor, which seemed childish. Some of the reviewers said it was a children's movie. Yeah, maybe. But the movie poster seems to show a drama. This film was not for me. I couldn't finish it.

This certainly isn't the greatest movie ever made, but doesn't claim to be. It's just an adventure film with romance that's fun and thoroughly entertaining with a surprisingly good cast of newcomers. Trevor St. John as the lead definitely stood out (he's now on the soap "One Life to Live" and very nice to look at) I thought about a film in the same genre that came out about the same time, " A Knight's Tale" which also had a handsome male lead and romantic princess connection. The other quirky characters were also fun to watch. I think it warrants a good sequel with a somewhat bigger budget, if you know what I mean. It's a great movie for kids. Lent it to a friend and her little daughter could not stop watching it over and over again. A great movie for the family. It doesn't really warrant the PG 13 rating as I do not normally let my 10 yr old son watch PG 13 and am very careful about what he watches, but this was just fine. The outtakes are hilarious. Review from a 10 year old boy: "My favorite movie. It's funny with lots of action. Two big thumbs up!"

Hmmm, the cast first. Well, I am a big fan of red heads and Khrystyne Haje, who plays Roxanne, was the only reason I stuck with this sucker. She is as pretty now as she was back on the old American TV series "Head of the Class." The other female lead, Ashley Jones as the princess, was also a delight to watch, though no one would accuse her of being a great actress from watching this movie. Trevor St. John plays the captain assigned to guard the Princess and he acquits himself well enough. He reminds me a Cary Elwes, who was the lead in "The Princess Bride."

How in the world did Ron Perlman(from "Beauty and the Beast fame") and Eric Roberts get signed to this?? I suspect Mr. Roberts had some connection to the production beyond simply appearing in the film. The credits were revealing in that Roberts had his own driver, production assistant, costumer, and make-up artist, while the rest of the cast had to share a seperate team.

In fact, the blooper reel at the end was, in my opinion, also quite revealing in that almost all of the clips were of Roberts blowing lines. Almost none of the other cast were shown on the blooper real and I was left wondering whether Roberts was the only one unable to keep his lines straight or instead used his clout so that the rest of the cast just wasn't included. I wanted to see the three main female leads gaff it up a little but no luck.

The script took few chances, surrounding a paper-thin plot with all the standard fairy-fantasy tale cliches. One interesting twists was that one of the King's Guard was played with some flair by a black actor (name unknown) with light homosexual overtones. He kept complaining about his pink hat with a big pink plume and about his clothes getting dirty. There wasn't really any sexual innuendo involved but quite a bit of lifestyle innuendo. It was something I hadn't seen before in this type of movie and the actor did a fair job with the script he was given. An interesting diversion...

The sword-play and stunt work was pretty weak. I have a little experience with sword-play and I suspect what was shown in the movie was more a result of a limited practice schedule. I have seen much better sword handling in a variety of situations and I think the actors just needed more practice before shooting. Especially since with a movie, the editor can do a lot to make it seem more dramatic by good cutting from shot to shot.

And there were a lot of shots. The filmakers did take time to get a lot of angles in the film. Clearly there was effort to do a lot of conceptual layout work before committing anything to film. It's just that what they ended up with wasn't very special. The cinematography was one of the best aspects (relatively speaking) to the film. A lot of it was shot using natural sunlight and all the actors looked good in their costumes - another bright spot in the work. It was clear that this film was shot entirely in one physical location with a cheesy-looking "ruins" serving as the focal point of action. The credits gave a big kudos to such-in-such a ranch...

"The King's Guard" would make for nice family-friendly viewing for all ages but won't hold adults attention for any length of time. While there are plenty of deaths during the film there is no blood or gore of any kind so younger kids are safe with this one. Unless you are a fan of one of the cast members go rent Princess Bride.