Paranoïd

Alba fans be warned: This review contains the odd spoiler.

Jessica, Jessica, Jessica... (sigh). Those almond-shaped eyes, pillowy lips, wavy dark hair, strokeable olive skin, utterly perfect body, cute speaking voice, tight flawless behind... Like Cindy Crawford, Rosanna Arquette and Mariah Carey, Jessica Alba is one of those women who occupies a very special place in my affections. If only "Paranoid" was as appealing as she is.

Made by Sky Pictures (and sad proof that Sky is not the HBO of Britain), John Duigan's thrill-less thriller casts the gorgeous and sexy Jessica as an American model doing some work in London, who's plagued by a stalker, on good terms with her ex, and is persuaded to spend some time at a friend's house in the country, only to find that said house is seemingly entirely populated by weirdos (Iain Glen, Ewen Bremner, Jeanne Tripplehorn etc). The only interesting aspect of the movie not related to Miss Alba's charms is that our heroine is perpetually surrounded by weirdos even when she doesn't know it.

SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!

Her flat in London is spied on by a neighbour (Kevin Whately) who, though basically a stalker (he found her address book and thus started to be fascinated by her), is ultimately the one who rescues her from death in the end. Unfortunately they never meet, thereby denying us the closest thing we'll get to a "Dark Angel"/"Inspector Morse" crossover. But the last scene (revealing the identity of the phantom phone caller) indicates the poor girl still has her share of creeps in her life, without even knowing it.

WE NOW RETURN TO OUR REVIEW, STILL IN PROGRESS.

"Paranoid" does occasionally successfully conjure up an edgy, pervy atmosphere, and the cast does try their best, but the low budget and the off-key writing and directing from Duigan (on unfamiliar territory here, literally because he's Australian and figuratively considering his far superior dramas "The Year My Voice Broke," "Flirting" and "Sirens") defuse any impact. Jessica's performance is even more sullen and depressed than her character is supposed to be... and her lack of energy is certainly shared by the viewer. (Why she and Jeanne Tripplehorn were in this movie is beyond me. In fact, why ANYONE was in it is beyond me.) Unexciting and occasionally unpleasant, anti-Murdoch advocates ("See the kind of tosh Rupert puts out?"), Kevin Whately devotees and die-hard Alba fans are the only ones who need apply.

By the way, note the mocked-up "FHM" cover that she appears on at one point. Jessica has never done the famed lad mag in real life, an oversight I demand be corrected forthwith.

I thought this movie wasn't extremely bad. It did run a little long..but maintaining your interest for about the middle 3o mins and a slighty good ending which left you with the feeling that the movie was semi-good. Alba wasn't really good ... I agree that it looked like she was constipated with the acting she was portraying. final grade 5 out of 10. I mean dam it has a 3.2 right now... i really doubt it deserves that.

I have a game. I believe I can find something interesting even intriguing in any film. This one tests me sorely because everything about the film itself is completely without merit. The only interesting thing is Jeanne Tripplehorn's presence. What a fall from grace! She was in one of the decade's blockbusters `Basic Instinct.'

In that, she was both attractive and showed some real acting promise. Not great, but promising. Rather like Ms Jolie or Theron at the time of this writing. She was also in the decade's hugest bomb, where her performance was harmoniously bad. How uneven a career. She was a strong harridan in the clever `Sliding Doors.' but helped `Mickey Blue Eyes' tank. "Till There Was You" was weakened by her. Now she shows up in a TV level piece of tripe. She could have saved this for me, because she had the chorus role. But she just didn't have the stuff. Is it drugs? Is it just random ups and downs?

I have not seen her in `Timecode.' That promises to be an important film for me. Let's hope for the best.

After reading the reviews at this site, I was expecting and extremely bad

movie like the undead or similar. However for a low budget film I thought it was very watchable and worth renting.

The biggest problem with this film was the lead actress Jessica Alba. Her performance was mediocre at best. The support cast however were more than competened and with a better lead actor the film would have been more than decent. Unfortunately Jessica let the film, the cast and the director down

Its is worth a watch

The stressed top model Chloe (Jessica Alba) is invited by an acquaintance to a dinner party with some friends of him in a house far from London. She faints and when she wakes up, everybody has left the house but the owner Stan (Ian Glen) and his weird family. She decides to stay until the next morning, but during the night she finds that the group indeed abducted her to use and tape her in sexual orgy.

What a weird and bizarre movie this "Paranoid" is! I am a fan of Jessica Alba, but she is simply awful, with one of the most ridiculous face and performance I have ever seen on screen. I liked the rude but definitely perfect definition of another user about her expression: "seems related to a struggle with constipation". The story has also a huge inconsistency, with a very bad direction and screenplay. Last but not the least, the Brazilian cable television NET summarizes in their crap magazine that "a woman is stalked in a haunted house after having troubles with her car". The same happens in the IMDb Plot Outline: "A young woman is stranded at a mysterious lodge after her car crashes nearby." What movie are they referring to? My vote is five.

Title (Brazil): "A Casa do Mal" ("The House of Evil")