Die Hard Dracula

Is there a point where a movie goes beyond campy to just plain dumb? I didn't think so - but Die Hard Dracula is pushing the envelope way into the realm of stupid. It has plenty of camp which I was expecting - the music score was inspired with only 3 songs Ride of the Valkyries, Blue Danube, and some obscure 70's wakka wakka music. And the effects from blue screening the main character over a CNN documentary of Romania, to the magic chest of gold with it's own internal lighting (if you close the top does it shut off like a fridge), to the rubber mouse being pulled across the floor for ambiance, there is plenty to entertain anyone who loves trashing movies.

But I do not think anybody in the production of the movie took it seriously, they set out to make trash from the beginning. You have to try to be this bad. The dialog drones on like the computer who reads weather warnings, the plot was just thrown together as the movie went along, and the cheesy mother/father dialogue should have been delivered to a child of 8 not 18 going on 43. They couldn't even find a stone building to film the interior scenes in - instead they found some Black and White cow wallpaper and "made do".

But what I think really turned me off to this movie is that I felt they tried too hard to be "bad in the good way" and ruined the whole fun of ridiculing the movie. It kind of felt like teasing the class clown... you get no pleasure from it and he gets the attention he wants.

Thanks a lot for ruining my fun guys... This movie had lots of potential for all time camp, but no, you had to try to be this bad.

There is better movie trash to watch, bail on this one.

In general, I tend to appreciate low-budget films. Either I admire them for being creative within limited resources, or I laugh at them for utterly failing to accomplish their goals. Thus, I went into this film at least expecting to be mildly amused. Unfortunately, the movie falls into the most unwatchable category of film: the failed comedy. The script isn't much to begin with, and the cast is very weak; combine these two things with inconsistent, hard-to-understand fake accents, and you have an unwatchable mess. Since the whole thing is supposed to be funny, the viewer can't even have the luxury of laughing at it for falling short of its ambitions. Unless you enjoy cringing, I'd recommend looking elsewhere for entertainment.

It's hard to even put this in to words. This movie honestly looked like a group of people threw this together in a week using a camcorder. I believe they started off trying to make a serious movie, then tried to make it a comedy when they realized how bad it was, and then failed at making it into a comedy. From what I could gather (Without skipping through) A guys girlfriend drowns, he goes to Europe. Dracula wakes up. People turn into bad acting vampires, and there's a bad ending. European women must be really trusting, because they have no trouble walking up to shrouded, hideously disfigured strangers, completely unarmed. There's all of 2 seconds of female nudity in the film, but believe me, you'd be better off watching "Porky's". God forbid you actually buy this thing like I did. I suppose I should have taken a hint when a new DVD only cost me 5 bucks. This is also one of the only dvd's I've seen that had no menu or scene selection. Even Crummy bootlegs usually give you that much. Please don't think that you can buy this thing just to make fun of it. The bad comedy makes even that joy impossible. Movies like this are the basic reason why independent films are so heavily frowned upon. I'm sure the makers had good intentions, and they probably enjoyed making it. But even Troma films have a certain degree of cheap disgusting charm to them, this one is just soul less.

I am honestly surprised at how low a rating this movie has received here. I've seen far worse movies, that have much higher ratings. Don't get me wrong, this is not a good movie, or even a "so bad it's good" movie ( such as "Autumn" (2009) ).

The thing that strikes me as the biggest single issue, is lack of creativity. Every possible chance the director had to suck the life out of this movie, he went for.

Here is a list of some of the issues I had with this little train wreck:

The editing. Many scenes were cut short, most notably the dinner scene. Many more seemed like there was some footage missing. The editing department was not very kind to scene transitions.

The script had to be written by a 12 year old. No adult could have come up with a storyline like this, unless he was very intoxicated.

The twist ending .... What?! Why?! How The?!

The acting. The folks who were in this were trying there best to act, but it is apparent they are not actors.

Sound was OK for the most part, except for certain scenes like the hayloft were noise obscured dialog.

All the central "good" characters were always in the same room.

Character's behavior "out of character" ( to put it mildly ).

Character interactions were very wrong.

Dracula - the whole character was wrong.

Dark blue day-for-night shots.

Plot points brought up, and dropped.

What little set design there were, looked more at home at a high school play, than this movie.

Special effects were so cheap, the movie would have been slightly better without them.

Of all these bad things I have said about this movie, there is 1 good thing I can say. It had some pretty good footage of the Sedlec Ossuary .

Bought this movie at a 2nd hand store for a $1, so i wasn't expecting too much. But i have to tell you, it was hilarious!!! Why would you be expecting an Oscar winner with a title like this? Come on don't be so serious! The best part was the villagers with the changing accents. "Let's get torches & pitchforks" & then the father more concerned about his daughter being in bed with the guy than her being carried off by the Dracula. The other part everyone enjoyed was the flying coffin with the song of the Valkyrie's for a theme. "The only way to travel" hahaha!!!We watched it with a group of people and maybe that made it better as we had our own running commentary. Would we watch it again.. oh yeah!