Lang nu shen long jian

As a rule, even though I am a dyed-in-the-wool hardcore fan of martial arts films, I have to go on record and state that I have a blazing hatred for ninja movies. Good movies about ninjas are few and far between, such as Super Ninjas, the Kozure Okami (Lone Wolf and Cub) series and the outstanding Challenge of the Ninja (aka Shaolin Challenges Ninja), so when you find a good one, cherish it. Most of the others are simply mediocre like the suckass Sho Kosugi flicks of the 1980's (Revenge of the Ninja, Enter the Ninja and others), or else just awful like the Swedish-made Ninja Mission, one of the handful of films that I have walked out on. Then there are films like Challenge of the Lady Ninja. This film is an unmitigated turdstorm, replete with horrid dubbing, a ridiculous plot, martial skills that veer toward the superhuman, and camera-work that makes one ask if it was lensed by Stevie Wonder. That said, it stars Chia Ling as a Chinese woman who somehow joins a clan of Japanese ninja and masters their skills. Chia Ling can throw down with the best of them (as seen in the unjustly ignored classic 13 Evil Bandits, aka Against the Drunken Cat Paws), looks terrific in a red ninja outfit, and is lots of fun to watch here, but the real selling point here is the fact that Challenge of the Lady Ninja is the martial arts film that Ed Wood might have made if he were still alive. This is in many ways the Plan Nine from Outer Space of kung fu films (and there are a lot of strong contenders for that dubious honor), what with a painful script, terrible acting and my favorite element: despite the fact that the story takes place in World War II, we see 1970's Cadillacs as period automobiles. The plot is utterly beside the point; just sit there in amazement as the film unfolds and realize that it is practically impossible to intentionally make a bad movie that is as entertaining as this one.

A Chinese girl living in Japan takes the final test to become a NInja. Once she passes she is told that her father has been killed back in China and she goes home to mourn him and to find out what happened. Arriving there she finds out that he father was killed by the man she was betrothed to who is now collaborating with the Japanese against the Chinese. (This is this the first mention of the film taking place during World War Two). Using her ninja skills she breaks into the bad guys house but is set upon by four ninja in his employ. She is wounded and only escapes thanks to a man in a skull mask. Vowing to put a stop to the evil going on she sets out to train a group of woman as a ninja army to help her.

This film is a great deal of fun. What can you say about a film that introduces the bad guy with the Empire theme from The Empire Strikes Back and where the lead wears a bright red ninja suit? It just goes from the minute the film starts straight to the end, making it up as it goes. You're never more than five minutes from any sort of action sequence so the pacing never flags. The plot often seems like its being made up as it goes along, but it doesn't matter since it all just carries you along. How can you not love a film where a female ninja power is to be able to appear in a bikini in order to arouse your enemy into an act of stupid lust? This is great popcorn movie. If you get the chance see it with a big bag of popcorn and an empty mind and you'll have a great time.

(Note: reading reviews of this film there appears that there are a couple of different versions some where the dubbing makes the bad guy the brother of the ninja instead of the betrothed; and some with no nudity and some with a few bare breasts. I have no idea which title is which version, however I don't think it will really make a difference which version you see)

While Hong Kong movie studios succeeded in pioneering new and innovative directions for their movies, Taiwan movie studios never outgrew their old school kung-fu movies. This movie is probably their last gasp at trying to hold on to the kung-fu movie format, only that they've mixed ladies in skimpy swimsuits to spice up the action.

Taiwan movies seems to be made by a committee of old school (or just old) producers that learned their craft in a certain way, and never changed. This movie was made in the late '80s, but looks like something out of the '70s. Their quality is never high, and by the end of the '70s they were no match for the quality of Hong Kong movies.

Hong Kong kung fu star Chen Kuan Tai stars in this movie. Chen is one of the few kung fu action movie star that successfully made transition into more modern movie format. He looks good in this movie. I can't say the same for other actors. The ladies that's supposed to be the babes in this movie looks too old to be playing this type of a role. They probably were babes for the age people who made this movie.

Quality wise this movie is about par for a Taiwanese movie. You can look for better quality movies from Hong Kong, and they're a better bet for this type of an entertainment.

The ninja stuff (magic tricks & abundant wirework) is mostly cheesy and ridiculous, but there are some enjoyable parts to this movie: the training sequences (these ladies ARE flexible), one's woman specialty which seems to be seductive stripping & dances performed by a mirage of her (you can definitely see why no man can resist her), some of the fight scenes when they stay on the ground, and a couple of outrageous plot twists near the end (which pretty much cancel the entire film!). The arguably most impressive fighter is a henchwoman who is identified as a Tae Kwon Do expert; she has a fight against the Lady Ninja of the title that soon turns into a water-y wrestling match. And although I have nothing against water-y female wrestling matches, I do have to wonder if it was done this way simply because our lead could not keep up with the TKD expert in a straight fight. ** out of 4.

I am lucky enough to have a friend who has this movie, and I have got to say that anyone who loves B-movies MUST find this somehow. Just look at this list!

• Bad English dubbing

• Inconsistent and unexplained plot elements

• Racial prejudice against Japanese (this was made in Hong Kong, after all)

• The kicker: The Empire's theme from Star Wars is the introduction music

It begins immediately. No credits or anything, you pop in the tape and the movie starts immediately. Stuff happens, most of which has been mentioned by the other reviewer. I won't bother to explain all of it. Suffice it to say, FIND THIS MOVIE NOW!