Colony Mutation

****minor spoilage****

A female scientist and her husband are both employed at the same genetic research lab. When hubby is caught two-timing with another girl on staff, angered wife douses him with a bottle of experimental tissue-regrowth serum. What results is one of the more interesting monster ideas to come along in quite a while...this guy transmogrifies into, literally, a modular being. His arms, legs, head, torso, and...yes...his penis...all become mobile parasitic predators, detaching then reassembling after feeding...and they're ALWAYS hungry.

A pretty damn cool premise, isn't it? Cryin' shame that David Cronenberg wasn't involved...it's an innovative biopunk horror concept which seems right up his proverbial alley. These tantalizing prospectives were, instead, commandeered by a nameless and faceless amateur personnel. The ill-starred contrecoup of their collective efforts, COLONY MUTATION, is one haywire direct-to-video dropping.

This faineant backyard production is atrociously lensed, spotlighting some of the most unconvincing special effects you'll ever see. As expected, performances are uniformly inanimate, though the male lead draws out a somewhat creditable antagonist character. This is a sad song of squandered potential, but sort of endearing as an inside-out-and-backwards oddity.

4/10