Mike Hammer, Private Eye

This syndicated show is a much grittier version of the show that was on the network in the 80's. Hammer is a tougher guy and is much more like the Darren McGavin version of the 50's which I liked best of all. There are no better scenes than when he tangles with the D.A. Barrington played by Kent Williams who should have gotten an Emmy. I hope that Stacy makes newer episodes as this character will never die.

A good detective can spot a fugazy in his sleep. That suit at the bar with the phony Rolex might fool that blonde with the big eyes, but guess what, pal, she's no blonde. And those big eyes? Well, let's just leave it at that.

There once was a pretty good series called. "The New Mike Hammer"(1984-89). It was good, sometimes very good. I liked the cast. I liked the plots. I liked the witty dialogue. OK, maybe at times it was only half-witty, but I liked it. And I looked forward to watching it. Sure it was filled with eye candy, but so what. I like candy, see, and lots of it. Keep it coming!

Which brings us to this piece of ... sure, it's called "Mike Hammer, Private Eye", but if you look closely, you'll see "Roleks" written all over it! It's got it all - crummy acting, ridiculous dialogue, non-existent sets, and all the production value of a student film. Yeah, OK it's got eye candy. Well, somewhat.

And geez, Stacy, I know she's your wife, but why do we have to suffer?

"Mike Hammer, Private Eye" was nothing more then a watered down version of the 80s classics. Slow, and aging, Mike Hammer lacked the true "intimidation" a younger version of himself had. The 80s show was grittier, tougher, and more lively, while today it seems looser and more sophisticated. I tried getting into it, but I was FAR more upset that A&E canceled the old Mike Hammer reruns, then this old watered down version got canceled. Big disappointment, thankfully Stacy Keach went on to better things!

Mike Hammer (Stacy Keach) is a hard-boiled private investigator in New York City. Velda (Shannon Whirry) is his loyal assistant. In the pilot, Mike is looking for the killer of his friend Mike Farrell. The episode ends with Mike hiring the son Nick Farrell (Shane Conrad).

Stacy Keach returns in the late 90's to relive his earlier 80's success. In a way, I think this is a missed opportunity. They are now fully in the computer age and Mike Hammer is a complete computer illiterate. He is a man outside of his time. He is a 50's character living in the 90's. That's what this show should be about. He should be smoking and prevented from smoking in every other episode. They may have made that point once. There is one episode where he tried a cell phone and it looks utterly weird. I'm glad that he dumped it at the end of the episode. He should be having more fun with that aspect.

The franchise is populated by babes with boobs and men with bent noses. That does not bode well acting-wise. In fact, 90's erotic thriller queen Shannon Whirry is the best actress in most episodes. There are few future stars in the cast list. I've been rewatching a lot of the old shows and the good ones have surprising future stars in them. It's not the case here. This show is what it intends to be. Stacy Keach gets to return to his former glory. The humor is rather clunky. They need to get rid of the pizza in the opening credits. This show would work better if he is the old guy working the new world. This feels old and it refuses to revel in it.

The episode I just watched was number 20 of 26 that are packaged in one Mike Hammer set from 1997 and '98. The production values were low budget filming in Ventura, CA for New York. There are some exterior establishing shots of The Big Apple, but much of the location sets look like anywhere but New York.

The episode is called The Maya Connection. Some of the dialog is haunting and maybe prophetic. The very first line in this show is a voice-over saying, "Saddam Hussein... We should have got him when we had the chance." The accompanying visuals show someone loading a rifle.

There are a couple of establishing shots that show The World Trade Center towers. Later in the story we hear a voice-over saying, "The real victims of war are the people who live at Ground Zero." It all takes on a new meaning in today's world.

Maxwell Caufield is good as the guest star. I could visualize him in a James Bond type role. He is a secret agent in this. Maxwell is at his best in Grease 2. There is a lot of action and plenty of wise cracks, especially from Stacy Keach, our Mike Hammer.

The story is much too disjointed to follow. It doesn't matter. It has some action and comedy and some really weird stuff. A scene in the back seat of a taxi seems to be an Altoids commercial. The best comedy sighting in this is Stacy in drag as an Iraqi woman.

Worth the $11.99 for 26 episodes.

Tom Willett