Airborne

I saw this movie for free during Toronto's FantAsia '98 Festival, and I wanted my money back. The director was present (and was in fact was one of the organizers of FantAsia) and someone asked him, after the film, if he had a hat full of cliches that he picked from to make the film. This film is BAD. It's worse than Highlander 2. It has NO redeeming features whatsoever. Cliche after cliche. Avoid at all possible costs. There is nothing to see here. Please move along.

I love most movies and I'm a big fan of Sean Bean so I thought that I would at least LIKE this movie. Also, I'm Canadian and this is a mostly-Canadian movie so I was prepared to cut it some serious slack. Nothing could have prepared me for the garbage that is "Airborne". Steve Guttenberg as an action hero? Give me a break. The acting throughout the movie was so bad I am going to have trouble sleeping tonight. I now have only two wishes in my life.

1. I hope that you never have to sit through this movie. 2. I wish I could get those 6 hours back. Oh wait, the movie's under 2 hours - it only seemed like 6 hours...

Don't watch this. Seriously.

This is one of the best comedies ever to be put on video, the trouble is, 'Airborne' is not meant as a comedy. Its meant as a one of those high octane, action thrillers with plot twists around every corner. I cant even begin to describe how bad the acting is in this one. The only person who comes out with any kind of credibility is Kim Coates who, as always, is excellant. The rest of the cast, Im afraid, are nothing short of dreadful. Especially Steve Guttenberg. I've always thought he was a terrible actor and his performance in this one proves it. His facail expression never changes throughout. This film is a pretty dire effort.

I had a pretty good idea that "Airborne" would be a bad movie before I actually watched it, because it was a production by Le Monde Entertainment, a Canadian outfit that made nothing but bad B movies during its run. So why did I watch it voluntarily? Two reasons, one being that it had Sean Bean in its cast, an actor I feel is very underrated. The second reason was that the movie promised to have Steve Guttenberg given the atypical acting job of playing an action star - and I thought that might be worth a few unintended laughs.

However, I was disappointed by both promises. Sean Bean has only what could be called an extended cameo - it's obvious he knocked off his few brief scenes in just a few days of shooting. As for Guttenberg, while there are a few (mild) chuckles seeing him act tough and swearing, he's for the most part pretty bland and not that lively.

In fact, the rest of the movie is just as bland and unexciting as Guttenberg. There is far more talk than action. And when the action does come, it's pretty badly handled, being poorly directed, choreographed, and edited. Part of this is probably due to the fact the movie clearly didn't have an adequate budget. The movie has a cheap look and feel like one you would associate with a 1990s Canadian television show.

If you think I am slamming this movie for being a B movie, I'm not. In fact, I *love* a great number of B movies. But this particular one simply doesn't cut it.

Wow... this is the kind of movie that makes you wonder who's idea this was and what soup kitchen are they eating at now. To say this was bad is an insult to the bad movies we all know and love.

When I saw Guttenberg's name in the TV guide I figured it would be a spoof... maybe it should have been. Could have made for a better movie.

Look for the scene where they are in an airplane in mid flight with the door open and there is no wind what so ever. They could have sprung for a fan at least.

Look for several Canadian & c-list actors in the movie. This is the kind of movie that litters the b-rate cable stations you never watch except on a rainy Sunday.