Strangeland

This movie looked pretty good a first. A somewhat original idea for a horror movie, I was looking forward to this movie to come out. I rented it on DVD, and I just had to laugh. Dee Snyder needs to stay out of the horror movie business! Probably the movie business altogether. The movie starts out promising, but goes downhill from there. The "bad guy," Captain Howdy is laughable, and the piercings and tattoos make you laugh, instead of making you scared! The actors in this movie are horrible, and I'm shocked they ever landed parts in their lives. I just found out the girl from Freaks and Geeks is the young girl who is tormented by Howdy, and I think she was awesome in Freaks and Geeks, but here, she's just like the rest of them. When it comes down to it, she doesn't even have any lines in the entire film, and her part is just a tiny piece of the puzzle. The detectives in this movie are fake, and both of them can't act for nothing. Like I said, the start of the film is ok with an internet stalker/murderer played by Snyder, but his character just isn't scary. Not much in the movie is scary, and most of it is just a way for Snyder to try to freak you out with horrible scenes of girls tied up naked with hooks going into their bodies, etc. I wouldn't waste my time on this movie. It's a bad movie, and an even worse horror movie.

1/2 out of ****

This film has officially taken the beauty of a human body, and made it something ugly. It's really too bad. This film is very stupid and really quite unpleasant. Sure, it may not be no CHAOS(2005), but it is certainly very cheap and dumb. At least it actually has a real message though. Beware of strangers on the internet. This is a good lesson and a good message, so for that, the film at least has something to be proud of. But otherwise, i feel that the film is a waste of time and money.

The plot revolves around Captain Howdy, a foolish goofy looking man who enjoys kidnapping young people, tying them up, and... piercing them?!?! now obviously, this guy is a sadist, but not in the traditional sense. You see, this is all he does. He doesn't kill them(at least on purpose as it seems), he doesn't appear to sexually violate them, he doesn't even really threaten them all that much. At least at first! There comes a point in the film where a particular thing happens to him for a particular reason by some particular people. I don't dare to reveal what, but somehow this causing him to not only pierce, but rape and kill. It doesn't really make much sense.

Listen, if you are a fan of horror movies or Dee Snyder, you deserve better. I just happen to think that one of the most attractive people in the movie making business is Linda Cardellini, and she is in this film. But she is wasted and used and her body is shown being distorted and destroyed in this terrible film. I think that it is awful that she was used that way in a film like this. I find this film to be very boring and ponderous and not at all scary. don't watch it.

Rated R for strong graphic torture/violence, language, nudity and sexuality.

It was hard to expect a lot from Strangeland. Its star and writer is Dee Snider, formerly the frontman for the metal band Twisted Sister and not known for his acting. It's also a bloody horror movie, which can be hit or miss for even the most fervent of fans. Oddly enough, though, the result is a passable representative of the genre, with Snider's Captain Howdy a memorable, if underexplored, villain.

Two teenage girls, in the early years of the Internet, encounter someone calling themselves Captain Howdy in an online chat room. He invites them to a party, and naturally they accept. Seems legit! I mean, his profile information makes him look like a cool dude! What could possibly go wrong? A lot, turns out. The girls go missing, and soon teen Tiana (Amal Roe) is found in the trunk of her own submerged car, hands and feet bound and mouth sewn shut. Her friend Genevieve (Linda Cardellini) is nowhere to be found.

Genevieve's dad happens to be a cop named Mike Gage (Kevin Gage), and he and his rambunctious young partner try desperately to find Genevieve. It doesn't take them long, because all they have to do is visit the same chat room, and using the leet hacker skillz of cousin Angela (Amy Smart), find the name of the last person to whom Genevieve chatted, strike up a conversation, and away they go. Very little cat and mouse follows, and it isn't long before Mike finds the good Captain, who's as wacked as you'd expect him to be, what with the sadistic attitude (setting aside the facial tattoos and multiple piercings). Turns out the guy's really into S&M, such as putting pins through people's skin and suspending them from a ceiling or in a really small stand-up cage.

From there on out, it's a cat-but-mostly-mouse game. Captain Howdy is much more interesting than anyone else in the movie, even redneck Jackson Roth, played by Robert Englund. Mike Gage makes for a boring lead. Snider appears to be having a lot of fun, pontificating like a megalomaniacal Batman villain, and is a good fit for the movie. Kind of a shame that more Strangeland movies weren't made. They weren't made, by the way, partly because of the film's sluggish second half, in which Howdy appears to be running a race in which everyone else is crawling on their backs. Yes, their backs. And it's kind of a shame, because the character is so strikingly charismatic. Was Captain Howdy always insane? We'll never know

Admittedly this film is far better than the sinister Rob Zombie junk. (sorry Rob fans)

At least Snyder put some substance, plot, and decent action into this. Have to hand it to him: he's not a bad actor. Especially in a psychotic role; which some may accuse of him as being cliché'. However, it is Dee Snyder. He wouldn't unrealistically portray a warm, loving father. Keep it real. And while I was never a huge fan, nor follower of metal music, I loved Twisted Sister. And Dee Snyder is my all-time favorite. Here he almost brilliantly resurrects his Capt. Howdy personae.

And featuring Robert Englund; a very noted actor, whom of course revolutionized horror movie history with his iconic Freddy Krueger. Here we are subject to an opposite, non-sinister role as Jack, much like Englund's nice-guy character Willie, from the classic V - TV series. Snyder obviously is an Englund fan (like the rest of us :) and deliberately cast him in this film, as honorary appearance. No doubt Englund is brilliant, and could easily pull off a crime-drama psychotic serial killer as well.

Overall, a few sinister scenes do drag a bit, and lack some intensity. However, Snyder does pull this thing off, for the most part.

As a simple but interesting story, Strangeland is in the middle of good and bad. It borrows too much from other flicks, like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Some lines ("What a rush?") are kind of terrible. And the Twisted Sister references that no one picks up on are laughable: the "we're not gonna take it" sign that the angry mob is holding and Dee's character "Capt. Howdy". Yes, it's in the Exorcist, but it is also a Sister song. On a good note, Dee Snider is a creepy looking character. The first time you really get a good look at him he's intense. And there are a few gross sadist scenes, one involving piercing an unwilling man in the most dreaded of all places. That part made me wince. And that's fairly hard to do. Also, I loved the fact that Robert Englund plays a character that is the exact opposite of his role in A Nightmare on Elm Street. Instead of playing the killer, he is the leader of the mob going to find the killer. Krueger fans will know what I'm talking about. It's a brilliant and appropriate piece of casting that genre fans should appreciate. Overall, the good outweighs the bad, and I would recommend watching it (at least once). You have to give Dee some credit, there are a lot worse movies out there.