I haven't seen the first Circuitry Man, which might be why Plughead Rewired left me so baffled. Or perhaps the reason for my bewilderment is that the film is a load of old twaddle - a confusing, sloppily directed mess with a terrible script and shoddy acting. Yes... that sounds more likely.
The plot? I wish I could tell you with certainty what the film was about but I'm not 100% sure. It all has something to do with cyber-villain 'Plughead' (Vernon 'Bennett from Commando' Wells), who is trying to control influential people via 'longevity chips'. But there's much more to the film than that, very little of which makes sense...
Traci Lords plays sexy blonde Norma (which is actually Traci's real name, fact fans) who is being blackmailed into assisting Plughead (although why he needs her help in particular is never explained). There are two crazy criminals who have escaped from a prison work detail on the Earth's surface, where it is so polluted that people must wear oxygen masks to survive. Hot brunette cop Kyle (Deborah Shelton) and synthetic pleasure android Danner (Jim Metzler) attempt to track down Plughead to put an end to his tyranny. And a pair of kooky lawmen speed across the planet in a supersonic car.
The action is all very scattershot, cutting between characters with little regard for narrative cohesion. Random nonsense includes Kyle digging up desert carrots to counteract pollutants in the atmosphere, the lawmen looking at mugshots on a Viewmaster, various characters interfacing via cables plugged into their necks, and matter transportation. The visuals are cheap and nasty throughout, with terrible sets and shoddy special effects (the use of a really naff 'negative image' filter being the absolute pits).
Wells, in the titular role, hams it up a treat, but the worst acting comes from Nicholas Worth as escaped criminal Rock, who is almost unbearable: even the lump of rock that he carries around with him puts in a better performance than he does.
2/10. Plughead Rewired narrowly escapes getting the lowest possible rating thanks to a gratuitous sex scene between Kyle and Danner (busty babe Shelton getting topless), the presence of pouty ex-porn star Lords (who doesn't get naked for a change, although she does squeeze into a figure-hugging little black dress), and Plughead exploding at the end.
