Stormswept

This could have been a good erotic thriller. What sexual goings-on that are present at least exude a degree of passion. And the women are all yummy. The idea of a mansion haunted by a spirit that unleashes sexual and then homicidal tendencies is a good premise, it just didn't make it to the end. The only thing I can figure is that about 3/4 thru the shoot, somebody made a deal with Kinmont to grace the video cover, get top billing, and spend about 10 minutes of screentime doing and saying nothing. Trying to fit her character into the script resulted in the scrambled mess Stormswept became. The 'flashback' sequence is so hacked up it is practically non-existent. Which is all too bad, considering it was pretty well shot, and the actors are fairly convincing, especially in light of what they're asked to do. Worth at least one watch for voyuers.

This movie would have to get better to be bad. Do not be fooled by the plot summary on back of the box. It is a poorly shot badly acted story about people you do not care about. It is not so bad as to be campy fun. Just say no.

This movie falls into the dubious Genre of, What the hell did I just watch? I use the term movie generously as a movie is equal parts cinematography and story. Stormswept is seriously lacking in the latter. It builds itself up as low budget horror/soft-core porn. Unfortunately, it only get's the low budget right. The story is laughably absent and plays like the filler between porno scenes. Only those are written better. And just when the movie finally looks like it's getting it's act together and get's moving on a story, It not only fails to deliver but gives us an ending that makes so sense whatsoever. I seriously couldn't spoil this movie even if I wanted to. Because the ending makes no sense at all.

In the end, there is no reason to watch this. One could argue Boobies, But with the internet today, one can NOT be that hard up for what brief bits of nudity that exist in this horrid purgatory of a movie. If you want decent soft-core with a spoonful of plot and a dash of Satanism, Watch Damien's Seed.

Update: Upon second viewing (about 30 years later). I find myself lamenting what was good about this movie. There is actually the kernel of several good ideas here. The idea of being trapped in a haunted house, with a randy ghost, has been done before, but then someone going crazy and killing everyone during an orgy is a swerve that could give a lot of weight to an otherwise standard softcore porn fluff. Sadly, this fails even at softcore porn given our first sex scene doesn't happen until the 55 minute mark. In two hours we only get three sex scenes total.

Ultimately, While we do find out who the killer is, they are horribly underdeveloped. And I struggled to remember who they were. Honestly even the top billed actress really served no purpose and could have been left out entirely. Again the premise was interesting but it goes nowhere.

So in the end, No it was not a joke. Someone clearly cared about this movie, but lacked the skills to make it.

This seems to have been an attempt to make a mainstream "psychological" horror film with a bunch of great looking actors that can't act very well, despite a long list of "B" movie credits on many of the cast's parts. This meant mostly a lot of dead air until the extremely brief nudity and violence scenes.

My guess is that they paid so much for the cast that they could not afford a director, although it is very well photographed.

Formula: "B" movie - nudity - violence - acting = very long boring trailer.

I...don't get what they were trying to do, but I can tell you with confidence that they didn't accomplish it.

I'm gonna keep it simple: The film quality is terrible, the acting is bad, and the editing is atrocious. It stars the blonde female cop from Samurai Cop, so...yeah. You know it's gonna be bad. But not entertainingly bad like Samurai Cop. Just bad bad like the Samurai Cop sequel.

It couldn't beat my 15-minute cut-off.