Barbarian Queen II: The Empress Strikes Back

Ok, I'll admit it. I'm a Lana Clarkson fan. Her torture scene in "Barbarian Queen" was one of the best mainstream "B" movie bondage scenes ever. Lana can moan and twitch with the best of them and make it look like fun. "Barbarian Queen II", supposedly the sequel to the first film, really doesn't have anything to do with the original. None of the characters from the first film are back and Lana is the only returning actor, and even her character's name has been changed. Like the first film, you can see most of it in fast-forward mode on your VCR and just hit play whenever you see Lana in a dungeon.

In this film, Lana is a noblewoman whose evil brother usurps the crown and gains rule over the land. Lana escapes into the woods and gains the friendship of a band of woman warriors by defeating their leader in a mud wrestling match (Lana gets topless at the end of it). They attack the castle in an attempt to restore Lana to her rightful rule. Unfortunately, the attack is defeated and Lana is captured. Those who have seen the first film will appreciate these scenes.

Lana is (again) bound to an upright rack, though initially clothed this time. The torturer makes a brief speech before removing her top. Just as he is about to begin the day's activities, a young girl enters the room stands in front of the rack and announces "I will enjoy this part when I am queen." Lana retorts and the torturer starts his demonstration of the new rack. This time, instead of a silver hand with a needle embedded in the finger pricking Lana's body, the rack itself is lowered onto a bed of sharpened spikes. This shot would've been much better if we could've seen a full-view of Lana tied to the table. Instead we have a profile of Lana's head and the other two actors bending over into the shot. Obviously, Lana is NOT tied to the table but is just leaning over, too. Such a waste of potential.

Anyway, while everyone is away at dinner, Lana manages to free her hands and escape. She's soon recaptured while trying to decide what to do with a magic sceptre (apparantly the source of power) and is sentenced to death by torture. Just as this movie is "Barbarian Queen II", so too we get to see "Lana On The Rack Twice" and I'm glad we do. I have to give Lana credit for these two movies and their torture scenes. She really does do a good job of playing the strong defiant torture victim, though I wish the second rack scene had been a bit longer with more build-up and drama. Same with a later scene where the young girl places a spider on Lana's arm as Lana is on her back on another rack (or perhaps the same rack rotated horizontally). It would've been a better scene if Lana's character had been conscious and could squirm as the spider is placed on her arm and crawls up her shoulder. It could've made the similar James Bond scene look like amateur film.

"Barbarian Queen" and "Barbarian Queen II" were made several years apart and in that time Lana Clarkson became more "womanly". Don't worry - they're real. And they're spectacular. I'm hoping that Lana can be convinced to do a "Barbarian Queen III" and give us 3 long rack scenes, if she's still got the body for it. Lana, if you see this, hit the gym and let's get one more film on that filmography, girl. Do it for your fans. We're counting on you.

Anyway, Lana is eventually freed by a knight and they go on to defeat the evil ruler and liberate the land. You can take her top, but you can't take her FREEDOM!

Well, this film is what it is. Some of the criticism is a bit overwrought. Yes, the plot is odd, and the production values are low. I would describe it as campy rather than just simply bad. The filmmakers cannot be oblivious to what they are putting on the screen. In the sword fighting scenes, the actors don't really even try to make it look real. Lana Clarkson looked so beautiful here, and that is sort of the point, not the medieval plot and staging. I had forgotten that Miss Clarkson was the actress murdered by Phil Spector. So sad.

Lana Clarkson is back as A barbarian Queen (her name's different) in this Z-grade flick. The tale has something to do with a queen being outcast and joining up with other rebels to fight the king and his snotty brat of a daughter to get a magic scepture, but you didn't choose to watch something called Barbarian Queen 2 looking for plot did you? Copious amounts of T&A are what you're after, perv. Fortunately, it has a liberal dose of those. But it seems Lana spent more on her chest than the film makers spent on the movie. There's cheap, there's low-budget, there's NO budget, and then there's Barbarian Queen 2. Pretty watchable late at night while in a drunken stupor though. We'll miss you Lana, it's sad that a piece of excrement felt the need to take your life.

My Trash movie grade: D+

Poorly done, poorly scripted, poorly shot, just a film disaster. It looked like more budget was spent on hairdressing than the costumes or props department got. Sad tale of a group of women forced to live as outlaws in the forest with only their never seen hairdressers as company. The late Lana Clarkson "stars" and shows off her chest to save the day. Mudwrestling topless, tied to a torture rack, showing off the latest in forest mini skirts, it's all in a day's work for these babes. If you have lots of time on your hands watch this film. It usually plays about 3-4 am on the various movie channels, so plan on staying up late.

This is a follow-up to Barbarian Queen, but certainly not a sequel, although Lana Clarkson is back as the female protagonist (slightly changed name, Amathea). This time she is rivaling her brother, who has unjustly usurped the crown on the basis of a presumed death of their father, but on a more mundane level his principal advisor Hofrax is her chief nemesis, along with her brother's daughter. The characters are different, but she is once again leading a few elite women warriors and peasants to justice. Greg Wrangler plays her love interest (Aurion). Pretty much the same stuff, with less often, less intense bondage etc. but a nice mudwrestling scene near the beginning. In movies like this, when I think some of the acting is pretty bad (this does not include Lana), I guess I have to be understanding in realizing they have programmed, wooden lines and delivery, so... Overall, I felt this one fell a bit short of the original.