Embrace of the Vampire

...I found this quite dull. First, there's barely a story - much of the movie is devoted to sex scenes that stop the story completely, and have no real significance in altering the "evolving" plot.

So if there's a lot of sex, there must be some merit, right? Actually, I found the sex and nude scenes flatly directed - despite the flesh and activity shown, surprisingly a lot of these scenes have nothing erotic to them.

We don't learn a lot about the characters. For instance, why does the vampire character only have a certain time to live? How did he get to where he is in the movie? How did he find the heroine? And so on. None of this is explained. And speaking of the characters, none aroused any sympathy - in fact, all of them seemed annoying.

And though the movie is supposed to be about vampires, there's hardly any vampire action!

Yes, You-Know-Who gets naked enough, but that's not enough to save this movie, or even make it worth fast-forwarding.

Okay I am a huge vampire film fan. I saw this movie and I laughed! Alyssa Milano plays Charlotte, a young virgin fresh out of a convent and entering college. She has a handsome and sweet boyfriend named Chris who is willing to wait till she is ready but even he has his sexual frustrations. Charlotte becomes the target and object of a nameless Vampire's desires (played by The Krays Martin Kemp). The Vampire is dying or in threat of being put in a deep sleep unless he takes the blood of a virgin, but not just any virgin: the reincarnation of the virgin woman he once loved before he became a vampire. The idea is for the Vampire to seduce Charlotte and "put doupt in her heart" against her faithful but sexually frustrated Chris so that she will willingly surrenders herself to the Vampire. The Vampire does this through dreams and hypno spells and he also puts a voodoo out on Chris who also dreams that tell him that Charlotte is in danger. Then the film follows a series of pseudo-sensual, soft porn seduction scenes and campy horror scenes. The film is classic Alyssa Milano: she is incredible to look at! She is sensual and brave enough to bare her breasts before the camera on more than one scene. I hated at how over exaggerated and poorly written this film was. The Vampire seduction scenes are good, but after awhile he gets so boring and so repetitive. So if you like soft-core porn, vampire, horror, B- films: this is the movie for you otherwise this is a comedy!

Embrace of The Vampire stars Allysa Milano, who grew from a cute little girl on "Who's The Boss?" into a stunning young woman with apparently surgically enhanced boobs. She is sexy and always fun to watch whether she's in something good (Charmed) or not so good (Hugo Pool). This movie falls somewhere in the middle. It's not great, but still entertaining.

Martin Kemp, former pop star, has built a respectable acting career with his role in The Krays and several British TV shows. He plays a cursed vampire who must seduce an 18 year-old virgin or he will die. Milano is the virgin, whose boyfriend is pressuring for sex. Charlotte Lewis and Jennifer Tilly, the most talented performers in this film, are the ones with the smallest roles.

This is one of the better bad movies I've seen. If you've ever wanted to see Allysa's boobs and butt, you will love this movie. She would be worth watching even if she'd kept her clothes on.

This movie is pretty lame, honestly. If you're a fan of Alyssa Milano, the rather constant nudity will be a big plus, but there's nothing else to recommend it. It's not creepy. It's not tense. The plot is confused and wandering. There's no air of suspense. The writing is awful.

Vamp movies for some reason seem to have erotic tinges. That's fine. But it can't be the whole purpose of the movie. Of course, if all you want to do is ogle Alyssa, that's fine. Then it's a great movie. But for no other purpose.

The story, if one is to be found, is about a young college girl about to experience life for the first time. Turns out that she just may be the reincarnated wife of a late Count who never could cope with her death. Seems he returned home from battle one fine day only to find his beloved wife had killed herself on the false rumors of his death. Well, same Count becomes a vampire through some convenient miracle (because it was needed to have a shred of a plot) and then begins to pursue and court her in modern day. The rest is her inner struggle (alright, that's a stretch) between life, ghostly erotic dreams, voices, seduction, school, being away from home, falling in love, and clove cigarettes.

This movie started out with a really good and captivating plot; Alyssa Milano naked, involved in multiple erotic lesbian scenes. The only problem is that the producers tried to fill in the empty spaces of the movie with... a movie. Why didn't Ms Milano just film a short segment for Playboy or Spice and just be done with it?

Alright, seriously though... if you're interested in partially naked women kissing other partially naked women then this movie is for you. If you are interested in any other form of entertainment then I would skip this movie. The initial lesbian scene with Ms Milano and Charlotte Lewis does actually

come off as a good first time, nervous lesbian encounter for a young college women. (Not to mention the scene first introduced me to clove cigarettes)

All in all this movie is a shame; Ms Milano has undoubtedly proved herself a more then so-so actress. (I loved her in The Canterville Ghost). As for others, Jennifer Tilly does actually act nicely in my opinion. This isn't saying much but I do always enjoy watching Ms Tilly enjoy herself enjoying others in movies.

Nuf said.